The Infinity Axiom
by miss.eli
Summary: Axiom - a premise so obvious as to be accepted as true without controversy. Edward and Bella were best friends until a perfect storm of circumstances, insecurities, and misunderstandings separated them. But some things are just meant to be, even if they take a slight detour.
1. Chapter 1

Too slow for those who wait,  
Too swift for those who fear,  
Too long for those who grieve,  
Too short for those who rejoice;  
But for those who Love,  
Time is Eternity

~Henry Van Dyke

o-o-o-o-o-o

"Ben, can I borrow your Algorithms book? I gave mine to Marcus during lab and I don't want to go all the way across campus to get it back," Edward called to his roommate. His request was met with silence. He glanced into Ben's room and realized he was playing World of Warcraft. Again.

Edward sighed. Trying to talk to Ben when he was raiding was like trying to talk to Alice during the semi-annual Nordstrom's sale: basically impossible. But, he really wanted to get a head start on the homework so he wouldn't have to spend his whole weekend in one of the computer labs.

"Ben. Ben. Ben!" Edward had to resort to shouting when his attempts to draw Ben's attention were ignored. Ben finally turned and glared at him over his shoulder. "Where's the book?" Edward asked, shooting a glare right back.

"Backpack," Ben grunted, tilting his chin towards his bed before turning back to his game. Edward rolled his eyes. Honestly, you'd think the man could handle more than one word answers, or at least point rather than gesture with his head. Heaven forbid he remove his hand from his mouse or keyboard.

Edward rifled through the stuffed backpack, finally finding the battered, second-hand copy of the Algorithms text book. As he pulled it out of the overfilled bag, another slim book came out with it, dropping to the floor.

Edward crouched to retrieve the smaller book, but startled and nearly fell over when he saw the half-naked female torso on the cover. The woman was reclined on a bed covered in crisp white sheets, creating a stark contrast with her lightly tanned skin and lacy black lingerie. The focus on her body was soft except for her hand, which was playing with a delicate pearl necklace draped above a pair of lusciously round breasts. He noticed the delicate script "2015" in the corner and realized it was a calendar.

He hadn't expected his friend to be carrying such a provocative item in his backpack of all places. Plus, Ben had a steady girlfriend; they'd been together since middle school, and this just didn't seem like the kind of thing Ben would go for. A Star Trek calendar, absolutely. A nudie calendar, not so much.

Ben glanced up at Edward's startled huff, and as Edward rose to his feet holding the book, Ben's eyes widened in horror and he banged his head against the back of his chair in frustration.

"Shit, you're not supposed to see that," Ben groaned. "Angie's gonna kill me."

"Hey, I won't tell her. Everyone looks at stuff like this," Edward said gently, trying to soothe his friend's distress.

"No, she knows about it. It's her pictures, actually. I just promised her I wouldn't show anyone."

Edward glanced at the calendar again, confused. From the pictures Ben had up of him and Angela, he'd gotten the impression she was more of a cafe au lait skin tone than the peaches and cream skin in the picture. He decided he must have just been mistaken.

"For what it's worth, she's smokin' hot in these pictures," Edward said, then cringed, realizing how that might sound.

"Nah, that's not Angie. She just took the pictures, put it all together for a couple of her classes," Ben explained.

Now Edward was thoroughly confused. "So why can't you show it to anyone?"

Ben sighed. "The chick in the pictures is her roommate. Apparently she's super self-conscious and Angie practically had to beg her to pose for the shots, promise her that no one except the teachers would see the final product."

"Then why do _you_ have it?" Edward asked.

"Angie wanted a guys opinion before she turned it in, wanted to make sure it worked as a 'marketable item' or something," Ben shrugged.

"Uh, I'd say mission accomplished."

Ben laughed and nodded in agreement. Now that Edward had seen the calendar, Ben didn't seem overly anxious to retrieve it, so Edward started flipping through the rest of the pages. As he perused the provocative yet tasteful pictures, he noticed the model's face was either cut out or obscured in every shot.

It struck him as odd, since she seemed to be attractive in the few pictures where her face was visible but in shadows or blurred. Then again, Ben had said she was self-conscious so that must be why.

As Edward flipped through the pages of the calendar, something tickled the back of his mind, but he couldn't quite put his finger on what. Having made it through all the pictures, he decided to go back to a few that had particularly caught his eye. They may be fairly tasteful shots, but they were still extremely sexy, and Edward was mentally cataloguing the images for later _personal_ use.

He paused at the image for May. The girl was wearing a sheer, pale pink top that was actually fairly modest, although the panties she had on barely qualified as underwear. But that's not what had caught his eye. She had on the same pearls from the cover picture, but mixed in among the strands of pearls, Edward noticed another necklace.

He swallowed convulsively and brought the picture closer to inspect it. He was right - it was a delicate, jeweled infinity symbol. Just like the one he had given...Edward shook his head in denial. There was no way.

He scanned the other pictures, and more memories jumped out at him. A cluster of freckles on her shoulder that he would trace gently while letting the sunshine dry the moisture from his body after swimming. A small scar on her wrist, a burn from a cookie pan that he had held under cool water while she whimpered against his shoulder.

"R2..." Edward breathed in disbelief.

"What?" Ben had turned back to his game, but now craned his head around to peer at Edward in confusion.

Embarrassed, Edward cleared his throat and tried to act nonchalant. "So you said this is Angie's roommate?" His cover was blown when his voice cracked on the last word.

Ben eyed Edward warily, then slowly nodded.

"Know her name?" Edward asked, hoping his voice didn't betray his eagerness.

"Bella, I think," Ben answered.

Edward sucked in a surprised breath upon hearing his suspicions confirmed. Ben was looking at him like he had lost his mind, but Edward didn't notice. He was too busy trying to process the revelation that this gorgeous, scantily clad woman was, in fact, his Bella. The R2-D2 to his C-3PO.

He sat down heavily on Ben's bed, staring at the calendar in front of him, trying to reconcile the truth in his mind. He vaguely heard Ben say his name, but didn't respond.

Bella Swan...he didn't have a single childhood memory that didn't involve her. He'd been in love with her since before he even knew what that meant. But he hadn't talked to her in almost two years, though not from lack of trying on his part.

He glanced at the picture for May again, focusing on the infinity necklace. He had given it to her just before his family moved away, a promise that he would always be there for her. But, by the time his family had settled into their new home in Alaska and Edward had finally gotten internet access again, he had found himself unfriended and blocked when he tried to message her on Facebook.

That had broken his heart. He hadn't understood at the time why she suddenly cut him out of her life, and he still didn't. He'd obsessed for months, trying to figure out what he had done wrong, why she had severed all contact, but he came up empty. And it had gnawed at him ever since.

Edward raked a hand through his hair, then sat up a little straighter. Maybe this was a sign. A way for him to finally get some answers, and maybe a chance to fix it. Seriously, what were the odds that his roommate's girlfriend would be roommates with his wayward best friend?

In that instant, Edward was resolved. He was going to get his R2 back.

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: Here we go! I'm hoping to avoid lengthy A/N's in future chapters so this one is going to be pretty long. **

**First and foremost, the only thing I own is the plot. The characters, any recognizable locations, brands, etc, are used in fun - no infringement is intended; all I get out of this is my own personal enjoyment. **

**Secondly, the current plan is to update once a week. Once the story is completed (I'm about 75% done right now), I will look at posting more frequently. But for now, weekly updates to give me some lead-time to wrap things up. **

**Finally, thank you to all of you who gave me so much love for In Flight Entertainment. This is a very different story (definitely no strippers here), but I hope you love it just as much!**


	2. Chapter 2

"Let's start at the very beginning  
A very good place to start"

~ Maria, _The Sound of Music_

o-o-o-o-o-o

**Age 5:**

The house next door to the Swan's had been up for sale for a long time - as long as Bella could remember - until one day, a shiny black car pulled up, depositing a man in a suit at the curb. Bella looked up from the tea party she had set up on her porch and watched with growing excitement as he opened the trunk of the car and removed a "Sold" sticker. Bella dropped the tea pot and ran inside to the kitchen, where her mother was scrubbing the pan from last night's spaghetti dinner.

"Mommy!" she gasped. "We have new neighbors!"

"Is that right, dear?" Renee hummed, paying more attention to the baked-on tomato sauce than her exuberant daughter.

"I bet they have a girl my age and we'll have tea parties and play dress up and be bestest friends!" Bella continued, unaware she didn't hold her mother's full attention.

"That's nice, dear," Renee muttered, reaching for another squirt of dish soap. "Go finish your tea party."

Bella's shoulders sagged and she huffed a disapproving breath at her mother for not sharing her enthusiasm about the new best friend she was about to have. She stomped out to the porch, but the tea party had lost its appeal. The prospect of new neighbors was much more interesting.

Bella made sure she sat on the porch every day, eagerly awaiting the arrival of her new best friend. Finally, two weeks after the man in the suit had ignited all of her hopes, a procession of unfamiliar vehicles made their way carefully down the street.

The moving van led the way, followed by an SUV. The SUV parked at the curb between the vacant house and Bella's home, while the van backed into the driveway.

A tall man with dirty blonde hair climbed out of the cab of the moving van and moved around to the back to open the garage door.

A pretty woman with auburn hair climbed out of the SUV and went around to the backseat. Bella's breath hitched in anticipation - it was the same move her mother made when she had to get Bella out of the booster seat in the back of the car when they went to the grocery store. The woman rustled about for a few moments then stood upright.

The seconds passed like hours. Bella was sure time had slowed down and was dragging out the moment until her first glimpse of her new friend. The woman sure was taking her sweet time, and the tinted windows prevented Bella from seeing anything happening inside the car.

She clutched her stuffed rabbit and craned her neck as the woman straightened and made her way around the front of the car towards the driveway. Of course she had the child on her hip away from Bella, blocking her view except for a glimpse of hair a shade somewhere between the woman's auburn and Bella's own dark brown.

Finally, the woman turned towards the house. Bella didn't realize she had been holding her breath until she let it out in one big gust when she realized the child the woman was carrying was not, in fact, a little girl. The hair was too short, and the clothes were wrong.

Bella's mind immediately began working out alternate options for play time. She was adaptable. Her new best friend didn't need to be a girl - she liked running and exploring the forest behind her house, too. Maybe they could work out a system - one day he got to pick the activity and the next day, she did. She could deal with a boy, as long as he was her age. There weren't any other children in the quiet neighborhood where Bella and her parents lived, so she was eager for any companionship.

The blonde man came out of the house and met the woman in the driveway. He ruffled the little boy's hair, then moved to open the back of the truck. The woman set the little boy down, but he clung to her side, peering around the unfamiliar neighborhood warily.

His gaze swept up and down the street, but when his eyes caught on Bella standing on her porch, giving him the same scrutiny he was giving his new home, he dropped his gaze before she could smile or wave. His mother took his hand and led him into the house, but when she reemerged a moment later, the little boy was not with her. Bella watched the man and woman unload the back of the truck for a few minutes until she was certain the little boy would not be making another appearance. Sighing, she went back into her house to find something to occupy her afternoon.

She trudged up to her bedroom and flopped on her bed, staring at the glow-in-the-dark stars she had carefully arranged on her ceiling. So far, her new friend was not making things easy on her. He certainly didn't seem excited at the prospect of having a new best friend. Maybe he just didn't think a girl would make a good friend. Bella pondered this for a moment before concluding she simply needed to prove to him she was just as fun as a boy. She eyed the toys in her room for something she could use to prove her worth, but after considering the dolls and stuffed animals she realized she didn't really have any "boy" toys.

Resigned, she grabbed her favorite book about animals and her stuffed rabbit, and made her way to the back yard. This was her favorite place to think - the back yard edged a nature preserve, full of tall, old trees and scurrying wild life. Her dad had built her a tree house in one of the trees, and a swing hung down below it.

She settled into the swing, cuddling her rabbit close as she splayed the book open across her lap. She couldn't read all the words herself, but she'd demanded the story enough times at bedtime to have it mostly memorized, and the pictures were really pretty. She had just reached the page about tigers when she heard a small voice say, "Those are my favorites."

She whipped her head up, startled at the presence of someone else in her little bubble. When she realized it was the boy from next door, she was even more surprised. She was so caught up in processing that he had approached her and was talking to her that she didn't realize she hadn't said anything back yet.

At her prolonged silence, he flushed and dropped his eyes to his shoes again. "I mean, I like a lot of animals...but I've always liked tigers..." he muttered as he turned back towards his house. "Sorry...I'll leave you alone."

"Wait!" Bella yelled, then winced when she realized how loudly she had shouted. She dropped into a normal volume when he turned back, but he kept his eyes on the ground. "Sorry. Tigers are cool. My name's Bella, what's yours?"

"Edward," he whispered.

"My favorite animal is a swan, because that's my last name," Bella stated proudly.

Edward finally lifted his gaze back to meet hers. "That's cool that your last name is an animal. Mine is just a word, it doesn't mean anything."

"Oh, what is it?" Bella asked, hopeful that he seemed to be more comfortable talking to her as time went on.

"Cullen." He was back to whispering.

"Well, that could be an animal. What kind of animal do you think a Cullen would be?"

"It's not an animal," Edward scoffed, looking almost indignant a her suggestion.

"I know that, but it could be. None of the animal names meant anything until someone said they did. So if there was an animal called Cullen, what would it look like?"

He shuffled his feet and dropped his eyes again. "I've never thought about it."

Bella huffed. This boy was not making this best friends thing very easy on her.

"Well you like tigers, right? Maybe it's like a tiger, except...green," Bella announced, settling on green because she had noticed the color of his eyes.

The corner of his mouth twitched up in a small smile. "That would be cool," he whispered.

"Do you like to draw?" Bella asked suddenly. His eyes jerked up to hers and his brow furrowed in confusion. "I can go get my coloring stuff and we can draw what a Cullen would look like," she explained.

He shrugged, but his mouth lifted into that small half-smile again. "That sounds ok," he conceded.

"Wait here!" Bella exclaimed, dropping her book and rabbit to the ground as she scrambled off the swing. She raced inside and nearly collided with her father, who was just coming out to check on her.

"Easy there Bells, what's got your tush on fire?" he chuckled as he steadied her with gentle hands on her shoulders.

"Me and Edward are gonna color," she announced, squirming out of his grasp and racing up the stairs to collect her art supplies.

"Who's Edward?" Charlie wondered to Renee as she wandered into the living room.

"Must be the new boy who just moved in next door," she replied.

"Well, I hope he knows what he's in for with Hurricane Isabella," he chuckled as Bella raced back down the stairs, clutching paper and crayons.

Bella and Edward spent the rest of the afternoon laying on the cool grass under her tree house, drawing what a Cullen might look like. Bella noticed Edward was really good at drawing, and she asked him to draw her a swan. He blushed at her request, but agreed. When both children got called in for supper, they parted ways grudgingly.

"You wanna play tomorrow?" Bella asked as she gathered up her belongings and brushed the grass and dirt from her knees.

Edward's eyes found the ground again and he shrugged.

"Well, I'll come outside before lunch, and maybe we can play in my tree house if you come out?" she offered.

He shrugged again, but smiled. Bella was already learning that was his way of saying "yes".

"Great!" she enthused. "I'm glad you're my new best friend, Edward! See you tomorrow!" she called just before she headed back into her house.

"Me, too," he whispered back, a smile curling his lips.

**A/N: Ok, so I know you really, really wanted to get answers to the questions raised in chapter 1. And we'll get there. I promise. Just...not for a while. I swear I'm not trying to be evil, so put those pitchforks away and enjoy the ride. As a bribe (and because I realized it will take forever to finish posting otherwise), I'm going to increase postings to twice a week for the time being.**

**Also, a million thank you's to all who have read, reviewed, fave'd, followed, and rec'd. I appreciate all of it more than you can know. **


	3. Chapter 3

Friendship is a single soul living in two bodies

~ Aristotle

o-o-o-o-o-o

**Age 8:**

"Edward! Are you ok?!"

Edward pushed himself up off the ground, dusting himself off. His palms were raw and scraped from where he'd tried to brace himself from the fall. He grimaced when he noticed his pants had torn at the knee.

He squinted at the blurry figure of his best friend in front of him. "I hate Tyler..." he muttered as he started scanning the ground near his feet for his glasses.

"Here..." Bella murmured, pressing the frames into his hand. "They're kinda scratched...I don't get why he won't leave us alone."

Edward replaced the glasses on the bridge of his nose and groaned when he saw the new scuffs on the lenses. He knew how disappointed his mom would be when he showed up at home with ripped jeans and scratched glasses. Again.

Bella slung her arm around Edward's shoulders and leaned into him, squeezing him a bit. He sighed and leaned his head against hers. "He's just jealous because we have more brains in our little fingers than he has in his whole head," Edward said, repeating the words his mom used to comfort him when he complained at home about the kids picking on him.

Bella giggled, then frowned. "Still, he doesn't have to be such a dick."

Edward gasped at her language and Bella rolled her eyes at him. He was too polite to say things like that about Tyler Crowley and his band of cronies, but Bella was reaching the end of her patience. She was sick of the way they called her fat and teased her for always having a book, the way she preferred to read over pretty much any other activity. And she really hated the way they bullied Edward, taunting him, pushing him, tripping him. All because he was so much smarter than the lot of them combined.

"C'mon, let's go hide out in the library. Mrs. Cope never tells on me for being in there," Edward suggested.

"Perfect," Bella agreed, clasping his hand in hers as they scurried inside to the safety of the school library.

Mrs. Cope smiled at them as they tumbled into the library. "Well, if it isn't C-3PO and R2-D2. Hiding from the Storm Troopers again?"

Bella and Edward grinned at the nicknames the kind Mrs. Cope had bestowed upon them at the beginning of the school year, and the moniker they had given to Tyler and his friends. Mrs. Cope had overheard the two arguing over Star Wars one morning, and teased them about their fervor over whether or not Han shot first.

Bella earned the name R2-D2 because of her habit of rushing head-long into situations without considering the consequences. Edward, on the other hand, was much more cautious and since he and Bella were practically inseparable, he was deemed to be C-3PO.

"Yeah, Tyler pushed Edward again. Tore his jeans and scratched his glasses," Bella piped up indignantly.

Edward dropped his eyes, embarrassed, and Bella placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

Mrs. Cope clucked her tongue disapprovingly. "Well, you're welcome to spend the rest of recess in here. I love the company."

"Thanks, Mrs. C!" Bella chirped, pulling Edward over towards the bench under the window. They sat on opposite ends, pressing the soles of their shoes together in the middle, and got lost in their books until the bell rang, signaling the end of recess.

"Hey, R2?" Edward began as they headed back towards their classroom. "I'm gonna marry you one day, I think."

"What?" Bella was confused by the random conversation topic.

"I mean it. We don't fight, you like Star Wars and math, just like me, and even the stuff you don't like is stuff I do like, and vice versa, , like when your mom packs you ham and my mom packs me turkey and we just trade. It works out perfect!" Edward took a big breath after laying out his reasoning.

Though everything he'd said was true, Bella was still skeptical. "I guess, but..."

"Plus you're like the best friend ever, and if I have to be married to someone, I want it to be my best friend," Edward pushed on, trying to convince her of his brilliance.

After a thoughtful pause, Bella gave a quick nod. "Ok."

"Ok?"

"Yeah. I want you to be my best friend forever, so we might as well get married, right?"

"Exactly!" he agreed as unexpected warmth flooded through him at her acquiescence.

"Not for a few years, though," Bella warned.

"Well, duh," Edward snarked, rolling his eyes. Bella rolled her eyes right back.

Suddenly, Bella's eyes popped wide. "Does that mean we're gonna have to kiss?"

Though he hadn't considered that likelihood when he'd come up with his plan, he realized it was usually part of the marriage package. The idea didn't disgust him as much as he'd expected. "Probably," he agreed.

"Ew," Bella complained, wrinkling her nose.

Edward's face dropped. "You think I'm gross?" he asked softly.

Realizing she had hurt his feelings, Bella tried to reassure him. "No, not you. Just kissing. Can't we be married but not kiss?"

"I dunno, Mom and Dad kiss and seem to like it," Edward reasoned, still feeling stung from her earlier disgust.

"_My_ mom and dad don't kiss," Bella argued. "Sometimes they argue, but usually they just kinda ignore each other. They're never around each other enough to be kissing."

Edward knew he was losing hope of convincing her, so he made one last pitch. "Well, maybe it just takes the right pair to enjoy kissing. Or arguing is part of it. Like Han and Leia. They argue all the time but they still like kissing each other. Besides, I think I'd rather be married and kiss than married and not kiss..."

Bella considered his statement thoughtfully. He could practically see the wheels turning in her mind. Finally, she seemed to reach a decision and she declared, "Ok, then, let's try."

Edward was startled by her declaration. "What?"

"Let's try kissing," she elaborated, exasperated that he wasn't following her train of thought. He was the one who brought it up, after all.

"Oh, uh..." He hadn't considered that she'd want to test his theory. Edward glanced around, checking if anyone was watching, stalling for time. Bella puckered up her lips and squeezed her eyes shut tightly in anticipation.

Edward sighed, knowing there was no arguing with Bella once she'd made up her mind. He puckered his lips and leaned in. Just as their lips were about to meet, Edward closed his own eyes. The kiss was quick and chaste, but it sent an unfamiliar tingle down Edward's spine.

He was considering pressing his lips against Bella's again to see if the tingle would reoccur, but she had already spun away, having decided kissing was ok but maybe better if you were grown up.

"C'mon, 3PO. We can't be late for art!" she sang as she skipped ahead of him down the hallway.

Edward followed at a more sedate pace, a grin spreading across his face as he watched his best friend flounce towards their classroom. Best. Recess. Ever.

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: I had several major inner fan-girl moments this week because you guys are all sorts of awesome. So thank you, as always, for your support and kind words. XO**


	4. Chapter 4

Thus nature has no love for solitude, and always leans, as it were, on some support; and the sweetest support is found in the most intimate friendship

~ Marcus Tullius Cicero

o-o-o-o-o-o

**Age 11:**

Edward slid his gangly frame through the low door of the tree house and sighed when he saw Bella curled up in the corner, wrapped in the faded patchwork quilt her Grandma Swan had made for her. Tear tracks stained her cheeks and her eyes were swollen and red.

When he'd gotten home from his piano lesson and his mom had pulled him aside to quietly tell him what happened, he knew exactly where to look for his best friend. She always went to her old tree house when she was upset or worried. She called it her safe haven, and no one but Edward was allowed to join her there.

He crossed the worn floor silently, lifted the edge of the quilt, and slid inside with her. He tucked the corners back around them, then pulled her tight against him. She melted against him and sniffled softly. After a moment, the tears started in earnest, and she started sobbing against his neck. His hands skated gently over her back in soothing strokes, giving comfort as best he could.

They sat there for a long time, Bella sobbing and Edward holding her, not saying a word. Slowly, Bella's cries softened to whimpers and hiccups, then finally she was quiet. Edward waited, knowing she would speak when ready.

Finally, Bella spoke quietly, her voice raspy from her earlier tears. "W-Why would she leave?"

Edward tightened his arms around her and sighed again. "I don't know, R2. Did your dad say anything?"

"Just that she'd left a note saying she would be in touch but that she wouldn't be coming back."

Edward's vision clouded red with hatred for Bella's mother. How could she just leave her husband and daughter with no warning, no explanation?

"M-maybe it's my...my f-fault." Bella's quiet, stuttered declaration caught Edward by surprise, and he hugged her fiercely.

"Absolutely not. Whatever the reason is, it was all her. It is _not_ your fault," he insisted, tipping her face up. Her eyes swam with unshed tears, and the lost, shattered look in her eyes broke Edward's heart. His R2 was too sweet, too wonderful, to ever be subjected to this kind of pain. He hated that he didn't have the ability to fix this.

"I told her I hated her last week," Bella admitted meekly, and a few tears spilled down her cheeks. Edward brushed the drops away with his thumbs then placed a gentle kiss on her forehead.

"We all say things we don't mean. And you're just a kid. All kids say that to their parents. She knows you didn't mean it. Whatever made her decide to leave, it started way before that," Edward murmured reassuringly.

"But you didn't see the look on her face when I said it!" Bella argued. "She had been so angry before I said it, but then she just went blank and kinda walked away. She didn't even say anything."

"Well did you apologize?"

"Of course I did."

"Did she say anything when you apologized?" Edward prompted.

"She hugged me really tight and told me she knew I didn't mean it," Bella answered.

"See? Then that wasn't the reason."

"But what else could it be? Was I a bad kid? I don't think I was a bad kid, but maybe she thought I was a bad kid. Maybe I asked for too many toys, or spent too much time getting ready for school. Or if I had cleaned my room better, or eaten that terrible broccoli casserole she made, or..." As Bella rambled, more tears flowed down her cheeks, and Edward knew he had to settle her before she worked herself up too much.

"Shhh, R2. You know none of that was the reason. You're the best person in the world," he interrupted her mid-rant.

"Then why?" she implored him, looking up at him with anguished eyes. "She didn't even say good bye..."

He sighed and tucked her back into his side. She nuzzled into his neck and clutched at his t-shirt. "I wish I knew what to tell you, R2. But I don't. Your mom's the only one who can tell you why she really left, and she probably doesn't even really know. But you've still got your dad, and my mom, and my dad. And me. We all love you."

"You'll never leave me, will you 3PO?" Bella asked timidly.

"Never. You're stuck with me forever, whether you like it or not," Edward reassured her. Bella gave a half-hearted smile at his teasing, then dropped her head against his chest and snuggled deeper against him. The steady beat of his heart thrummed beneath her ear, the sound comforting her ragged nerves.

Bella knew she could count on Edward to be there for her. He always knew exactly what she needed, and his quiet, solid presence soothed her in a way no one and nothing else could.

Eventually, her breathing evened and slowed, and Edward realized she was asleep. He shifted a little so that he was leaning against the wall of the tree house and Bella was curled against his chest. After resituating the quilt to ensure she was fully cocooned, he leaned his head down to rest against hers. "I'll always be your 3PO," Edward whispered against her hair, before drifting off to sleep himself.

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: So things are getting a little rocky. Next chapter isn't quite so rough, but it's not going to be smooth sailing for a few more chapters. Patience my dears. **

**I also want to say hello and welcome to all the new readers who've found this story through FicSisters and The Lemonade Stand; having my story recommended on those sites is amazing and humbling. And if you found this story through other means, hello and welcome to you, too! I'm happy all of you are here, however you got here. **


	5. Chapter 5

He stepped down, trying not to look long at her, as if she were the sun. Yet he saw her, like the sun, even without looking.

~ Leo Tolstoy, _Anna Karenina_

o-o-o-o-o-o

**Age 13:**

"Mims?" Bella called timidly as she peeked her head around the doorframe into the kitchen of the Cullen home. Esme was bent over a pile of bread dough, kneading away on the lightly floured counter.

"Edward's at his piano lesson, dear. He should be home around 4," Esme answered automatically, used to Bella coming to find her friend.

Bella cleared her throat awkwardly. "Uh...yeah, I know. I actually wanted to, um, to talk to you?" her voice lifted at the end as if she were requesting permission.

Esme turned her head at the tone of Bella's voice, and her brow creased in worry when she saw the look on Bella's face. "What's the matter, Bebe?"

Bella gave a half-hearted smile at the familiar endearment, then dropped her eyes to the tile floor.

"Um...I need your help." Her voice was barely above a whisper and her ears were starting to tinge pink with an embarrassed flush.

"Anything you need, dear. You know that. What can I help with?" Esme asked as she untied her apron and pulled Bella to sit at the bar stools at the kitchen counter.

Bella idly traced patterns on the smooth granite surface, stalling. Finally, she worked up enough nerve to begin her request. "I, um...I got...uh, I don't have...what I mean is, my dad isn't...um..." her voice trailed off as she struggled to find the least mortifying words to explain her predicament.

"Relax, Bebe. It's just me. You know you can talk to me about anything, right?" Esme soothed as she placed a calming hand on the back of Bella's, stilling her frantic fidgeting. Bella nodded, but kept her face down, letting her long, chestnut hair swing down to hide her burning cheeks.

Esme waited patiently while Bella took a few deep, bracing breaths as she calmed herself and collected her thoughts. Finally, Bella took one final deep breath, and presented her dilemma. "I got my period and I don't have any...stuff. And I think I need a bra. And I really, really don't want to ask my dad to take me to get that kind of stuff."

Bella was fairly certain that with as difficult as it was to come to Esme with this problem, she would very likely literally die of embarrassment if she had to talk to her dad. Not having a mother at home made being a teenage girl infinitely more difficult. Luckily, Esme had practically adopted Bella as her own in the years since Renee had left, so she at least had someone to guide her through this painfully awkward time in her life.

Esme smile indulgently at Bella's reticence over this particular topic. She remembered how difficult it was to come to terms with the whirlwind of changes taking place in her newly teenaged body, how awful it was to feel like a stranger in her own skin.

Standing quickly, Esme pulled Bella into a tight hug. It took a moment for Bella to realize what was happening, but she quickly wrapped her arms around Esme's waist and clung to her. "Oh, sweet Bebe, don't you worry. We'll go and get you everything you need. I know it might not feel like it right now, but this is a very exciting time in your life."

Bella agreed with half of that statement, at least. It definitely did _not_ feel like a very exciting time in her life. But she held her tongue and basked in the warm, maternal affection being showered upon her.

Eventually, Esme pulled back and put her hand on Bella's shoulders. "What do you say I take you shopping, and we'll pick up what you need? And then any time you start running low, you just let me know and we'll go again."

Bella, still embarrassed at the topic of conversation, merely nodded, smiling shyly. Esme clapped her hands once, announcing, "Well let's set this dough out to rise, and then you and I will go and have ourselves a girls' day. Chop chop!"

Bella helped clean up the counters while Esme washed the dishes and put the bread dough into a small bowl covered with a damp towel.

As Bella dried a mixing bowl, Esme teased, "I can't believe my little Bebe is growing up so fast! I'll have to come up with a new nickname, something you hate so I can torment you when you're in the middle of a mood swing."

"You do that and I'll start calling you Momster or something," Bella retorted playfully.

"That sounds like something Pauly Shore would say - 'The _Mom_-ster'," Esme mused. At Bella's blank look, she begged, "Oh, please tell me you know who Pauly Shore is?" Bella shook her head in the negative and Esme placed a hand over her heart, feigning heartbreak. "God, I've just aged myself. Kids these days...no understanding of the classics..." she trailed off with a dramatic sigh.

Their eyes met across the kitchen, and they both dissolved into giggles at Esme's melodramatics. Gasping for breath, Esme scolded, "No respect. Let's go, sweetness. Time to have some fun!"

Bella had been skeptical at how much fun she could have shopping for feminine items, but she always had the best time with Mims. Though Bella had only intended to get one bra, Esme refused to let her settle for the utilitarian white one she initially picked. Instead, Bella ended up with several matching bra and panty sets in colorful patterns and soft, comfortable fabrics.

Esme also insisted on getting her some new pajamas, and several blouses. By the time they made their way back to the Cullen house, the sun was low in the sky and their feet ached from the hours spent shopping. They tumbled giggling through the doors to the kitchen, startling Edward. He'd just gotten home from his lesson and was rifling through the fridge for a snack to tide him over until dinner.

"What have you two been up to?" he asked warily, eyeing the bags clutched in both women's hands. Bella's face immediately ignited in a blush and she wouldn't make eye contact with him. Edward was confused by her reaction, and craned his neck to peer at her bags.

"N-nothing. Just shopping. Girl's day. Y'know...?" Bella rambled, her voice cracking in embarrassment.

"What'd you get? Anything neat? Can I see?"

"NO!" Bella shouted frantically. Edward's eyebrows shot towards his hairline at her response. She'd never refused to show him what she'd bought before. They'd never kept anything from each other, not even something as trivial as shopping trip purchases.

He was about to argue, but the warning look on his mom's face had him biting his tongue. Satisfied that Edward wasn't going to say anything to inadvertently embarrass Bella, Esme turned and began pulling items out of the pantry to make dinner.

Bella knew she needed to flee before Edward pressed her further. She'd never been able to keep anything from him, and she absolutely did not want him to know what she'd spent the afternoon shopping for.

"I should, uh, go. Yeah, I have to go. To dinner. So..." Bella stuttered, backing out of the kitchen. Just as she turned to make her escape, one of her bags caught on the knob of a cabinet door and tore open, spilling the contents onto the kitchen floor.

Bella gasped in horror as the colorful bras and panties tumbled into a heap on the tiles. Edward just stared. He opened his mouth to say something, anything, but no words came to him. Bella's eyes filled with mortified tears, and she crouched to frantically scoop up the delicate pieces of fabric. She crammed them into one of the other bags, then without a backward glance, fled the kitchen.

Edward turned to his mom, hoping she could give him some guidance on what the heck had just happened, but the look on her face stopped his voice again.

"Don't," she warned. "Do not say a thing to Bella to embarrass her. Being a teenage girl is difficult enough without having a teenage boy point it out."

"But I - " he began.

"No," Esme interrupted. "Leave her be. She'll get over it in a day or two. Just let it go. And be gentle with her."

"Well, yeah, but - " he tried again.

"Edward," she admonished. "Your relationship with her is going to change now. Things are going to be more difficult, there are going to be all these new feelings and emotions, and neither of you are going to have a clue how to deal with them. But you two are so perfect together, I know you'll figure it out. Just remember, she's still your R2-D2 even when it seems like everything's different."

"Okaaay..." Edward drawled, confused by his mom's impromptu lecture. She cast a warning glare at his tone, then turned back to dinner. Edward was just about to head up to his room when Esme called over her shoulder, "Oh, and Edward? As your relationship with Bella changes and grows, you'll need to be responsible. So if you ever have any questions, please come to your father or me. We can give you advice, and if need be...protection."

Edward's eyes widened in horror when he realized exactly what her words implied. "Oh my god! Mom! No. Just no. She's my best friend. That would just be...weird...No!" he exclaimed before taking the stairs two at a time to escape the suddenly awkward conversation.

"Just you wait, baby boy. You'll be singing a different tune in no time," Esme muttered knowingly as she began peeling the potatoes for the evening's dinner.

Edward flew into his room and slammed the door behind him, relieved to be done with that topic of discussion. He knew it would be brought up again, and likely soon, but he didn't think it was necessary. Of course he loved Bella, but not _that_ way. She was his best friend, his R2. Thinking of her in any other way just felt wrong.

Out of habit, he glanced out his window, the one that overlooked Bella's room. It hadn't taken long after Edward moved in for them to realize their windows faced each other, and they'd had many long conversations across the small gap over the years, usually late at night, long after their parents thought they were asleep.

He did a double take when he realized Bella was standing in the middle of her room, not wearing a shirt. She was assessing her reflection in the mirror she had hung on the back of her door, trying on the new bras she and Esme had purchased that afternoon.

The bra she was unknowingly modeling was black with white polka dots, and a small white rosette between the cups. It was modest and demure, but Edward had never seen anything more provocative. Realizing Bella would probably die of embarrassment if she caught him watching her, he quickly shut his blinds and turned on his computer. He needed something to distract him from the unfamiliar emotions swirling inside him.

That night, Edward couldn't sleep. He lay in his bed, staring at the ceiling, obsessing over the image of Bella, half-naked in that sweet polka dot bra. He heard the floorboards creak, and whipped his head in the direction of the noise. He nearly swallowed his tongue when he saw Bella standing in his room, wearing nothing but that bra and a pair of matching panties. His dick twitched in his sleep pants, instantly hard.

He opened his mouth the question what she was doing in his room, in the middle of the night, practically naked. But the words died in his throat as she knelt on the end of his bed and crawled towards him, her hair cascading over one shoulder in a mass of curls.

Edward swallowed hard, staring at his best friend as she rose up and knelt straddling his thighs, just below where he throbbed for her. She gave him a coy smile, before reaching behind her back and fiddling with the clasp on her bra.

The straps loosened and slipped down over her shoulders, and the cups dropped just a bit lower. She brought her hands back around front, and just as she began to draw the cups away from her breasts, Edward startled awake, grimacing at the sticky wetness seeping into his sheets through his pajama pants.

He scrubbed his hands over his face, disgusted with himself for thinking of his best friend like that, as he got up to change his sheets and his pajamas. It's not like she would ever feel that way about him anyway.

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: An early update today - it's my son's first Easter this year, so rather than try to cram everything in tomorrow, we're starting this afternoon. Happy Easter if you celebrate it, and happy weekend if you don't!**


	6. Chapter 6

Sometimes I have the strangest feeling about you. Especially when you are near me as you are now. It feels as though I had a string tied here under my left rib where my heart is, tightly knotted to you in a similar fashion. And I am afraid that this cord will be snapped, and I shall bleed inwardly.

~ Charlotte Brontë, _Jane Eyre_

o-o-o-o-o-o

**Age 15:**

Bella squared her shoulders and slammed her locker shut, giving herself a mental pep talk. Today was the day. She was finally going to tell Edward that she didn't just want to be the R2-D2 to his C-3PO; she wanted to be the Leia to his Han. Now she just had to find him.

As she made her way down the hallway, she saw Lauren Mallory and her gaggle of admirers. Hoping to avoid their attention, she dropped her eyes to the floor as she hunched her shoulders and tried to blend in with the crowd.

Unfortunately, Lauren seemed to have some sort of radar for when Bella was in earshot, and she took great delight in taunting her over her weight.

"Hey, Belly, nice muffin top!"

Bella tried to walk faster, but the hallway was crowded and she couldn't escape as others in the group joined in.

"She can practically fly away with those bingo wings."

"The bakery called, they want their rolls back."

"Seriously, you can feel the ground shake as she walks by!"

Face flaming in humiliation, Bella ducked her head lower, letting her hair swing to cover her face as she pushed her way through the mass of bodies. In her haste, she tripped over her own feet and stumbled, colliding with a warm, solid body.

She felt embarrassed tears forming in the corners of her eyes and was just about to offer a frantic apology until gentle hands swept up to steady her and she recognized the tingle that occurred any time Edward touched her. A moment later his scent washed over her, and she sighed in relief.

"Where's the fire, R2?" he asked gently, skimming his fingers over her flushed cheek before tucking her hair behind her ear. It took all of Bella's self control not to lean into his hand and purr.

"Hey, Ahab, you harpoon that whale yet?" Eric called to Edward.

Edward's eyes snapped up, burning with barely contained fury. "Go to hell, Gherkin!" he yelled back, placing his hand on the small of Bella's back and leading her away. But rather than heading towards the biology lab, he led her out one of the side exits and out to the woods at the edge of the school's property.

"Edward, we need to go to Bio," Bella protested weakly.

"Fuck Bio," he spat, surprising Bella. She very rarely heard him use such harsh language. They walked in tense silence until they could no longer see the school. Then Edward's hand dropped and he spun away from her, running his hands through his hair and muttering as he paced.

Bella could only catch snippets of what he was saying, but she got the impression he was upset over Eric's comment. Her heart sank.

She knew she was overweight and unattractive - any mirror pointed that out with painful clarity - but she'd hoped given their history, Edward might have been able to look past that. Based on Edward's disgusted reaction to Eric's suggestion that he would have sex with her, she realized she had been mistaken. That hurt worse than any insult Lauren could ever deliver.

Then again, she _was_ noticing more and more awkwardness between them in the last few years. It wasn't anything Edward said, but there were certain occasions where she definitely noticed him keeping her at arm's length.

While Bella wallowed in her disappointment, Edward tried to calm himself down after witnessing the cruel treatment of his best friend by their classmates. Eric's crass insinuation had been the last straw.

The problem wasn't that Edward was opposed to the idea of sex with Bella. Quite the opposite. Since he'd inadvertently peeped on Bella when she first started needing bras, he'd been a man obsessed. She'd played a starring role in almost all of his fantasies, and as a red-blooded teenage boy, he'd had plenty of them.

The problem was that Edward felt incredibly guilty for casting her as the object of a horny teenage boy's lewd fantasies. She was beautiful, inside and out, and she was the best friend he could ever ask for.

She'd also never given Edward any indication she felt more for him than brotherly affection, and he was terrified that if he hinted at his non-platonic feelings it could ruin their friendship. So he kept his feelings to himself. Besides, he figured if Bella was interested in him as more than a friend, she'd have given him some signal by now.

He finally calmed himself down from the blind fury he'd been in and dropped himself wearily on the ground next to Bella.

She leaned her shoulder against his, then settled against his side. He rested his cheek on the top of her head and stared off into the distance.

"You can't listen to them, you know," he spoke softly, gently.

Bella sighed. "They're right though," she argued.

"They are not. They're assholes," Edward insisted. "They're just jealous because you're smart, and pretty, and sweet, and they're going to be trapped in this tiny town for the rest of their miserable lives. They're just trying to bring you down to their level."

Bella held her tongue, knowing if she argued further it would just irritate Edward further. He didn't understand what it was like to feel like you were trapped in your own body. After her mother had left, Bella had found comfort in food, and the extra flesh around her hips and stomach reflected that.

She hated being overweight, hated the taunts of her classmates, hated the reminder of her mother's abandonment every time she looked in the mirror. But she didn't know where to start to correct the problem, and so far hadn't really had enough of an incentive to even try.

The two sat in silence in the woods, lost in their own thoughts, until Edward glanced at his watch and announced that they needed to get back so they could catch the bus home. He hopped to his feet then held out his hands to help Bella up off the ground. Like always, he felt a thrum of energy when touching Bella, but he pushed that thought away before he got carried away and his body betrayed his response to her.

Once she was on her feet, he couldn't resist pulling her into a hug, burying his nose in her sweetly scented curls. "Seriously, R2, don't let them get to you."

"I know, 3PO," she murmured, nuzzling his chest and letting herself dream for a moment that there was more to his embrace than just friendly comfort.

"You're the best friend ever, Bella," he whispered before releasing her and guiding them back towards the school.

_Friend_, Bella thought bitterly. She had never hated that word so much.

**A/N: Being a teenager sucks. So does being afraid to say how you feel.**

**Thanks, as always, for your love! It's totally mutual :)**


	7. Chapter 7

Never say goodbye because goodbye means going away and going away means forgetting.

~ J.M. Barrie, _Peter Pan_

o-o-o-o-o-o

**Age 16:**

As had become her habit, Bella climbed up to her tree house with the intention of writing in her journal and daydreaming about a time when Edward would finally see her as more than a friend. She was startled when she ducked through the door and found Edward there, pacing the floor.

His head snapped in her direction and she saw his eyes were red-rimmed as if he'd been crying. Bella was immediately on edge. Edward never cried. The look in his eyes sent ice up her spine. Usually he looked at her with warmth and affection, but now his eyes were vacant and clouded with anguish.

"Hey," she said slowly, wrapping her arms around her torso to brace herself for the agony she instinctually knew was coming.

"Bella," he choked out before crossing to her and sweeping her into his arms.

His grip on her was tight, bordering on painful, and did nothing to ease Bella's mounting fears. "Edward? What's going on?" she asked, her voice wavering.

He didn't respond for a long moment. Bella was just about to repeat herself when he loosened his grip and moved back to meet her gaze.

"We're moving," he whispered. After a pause, he added bitterly, "To Alaska."

Bella's heart plummeted. In all the terrible scenarios that had been running through her mind since finding the agitated Edward in her tree house, this hadn't even crossed her mind. This was worse than the worst case scenario.

"What? No. Why?" Bella spluttered when she finally found her voice.

Edward stepped away and scrubbed his hands over his face before sinking to the floor and leaning against the wall. "Dad got a job offer from the hospital up there. Head of pediatrics and research grant money or something. I kinda stopped listening after they dropped the moving bomb on me."

"When?" Bella whispered, sinking to the floor on the opposite wall.

"End of the month. I don't even get to finish the school year here. God, I can't believe they're doing this to me. This sucks so fucking much!" His voice rose as he ranted until he was shouting.

Bella's eyes filled with tears and she dropped her head back to stare at the open sky above. She couldn't process this news. Edward had always been her ally, her protector, her best friend. She didn't think she could survive without talking to him or seeing his kind smile every day.

"I don't want to leave you, Bella," Edward whispered, echoing her thoughts. Bella met his eyes and saw the tears glimmering there. She decided in that moment that she needed to be strong for Edward. She tucked away her own pain as best she could, then crawled over to wrap her arms around him.

He burrowed against her and she felt the wetness of his tears against her neck. "You know you're always my C-3PO even if you're not right next door. R2 and 3PO get separated all the time in Star Wars, and they always find their way back together," she murmured against his hair.

He sat up and swiped the back of his hand against his eyes. "I have something for you," he said, his voice thick with emotion. "I got it for you for your birthday, but since I won't be here - " he cut off with a choking sound and Bella tried to will away the tears that were threatening to spill over.

Edward handed her a small box, and when Bella lifted the lid she barely suppressed her gasp of shock. "Edward," she breathed, lifting the delicate necklace out of the box and inspecting the sparkling infinity symbol.

"You know infinity means forever. That's what we are - R2 and 3PO forever," he explained as he held his hand out. Bella handed the chain to him and he gently clasped it around her neck. She fingered the infinity charm where it rested just at her collar bone and could no longer stop the tears from spilling down her cheeks.

Edward cupped her face in his hands and brushed the moisture away with his thumbs. "No good-byes. Just see-you-laters, ok?" Bella nodded, unable to speak around the lump in her throat.

He dropped a kiss to her forehead then pulled her tight against him again. They clung to each other the rest of the night, curled together under the starry sky.

A few weeks later, Bella stood on her porch again, much as she had a decade earlier. This time though, rather than delivering a new best friend to her, the procession of vehicles was tearing them apart. As the moving van and SUV faded into the distance, Bella finally let her knees give out, curled up on the floor, and wept.

o-o-o-o-o-o

Edward glared at his phone, as if his wrath would scare the electronic device enough to suddenly have a signal. The lack of cell phone service plus the fact that there had been a mix-up at the cable company and a technician wouldn't be able to get out to their new house to connect the internet and phone line for at least another week, meant it had been nearly two weeks since Edward had been able to get in touch with Bella.

He willed even the smallest bar to appear, if only for a moment, but the little icon indicating "no service" just glowed back at him mockingly. Edward sank into his chair and dropped his forehead onto his desk with a defeated thunk.

"Long day?" a voice chirped from his left.

Without lifting his head, he slid his eyes over to peer at the dark-haired girl in the desk next to him. "Long month," he corrected before closing his eyes again.

She made a sympathetic hum in her throat. "Left your girl back home, huh?"

Edward's eyes popped open in surprise.

"I'm really good at reading people," she explained with a laugh at his shocked expression. "Your eyes have followed every brunette who's passed by you but you won't make eye contact with any of the girls."

Edward grunted, but turned to face her. "Her name's Bella," he admitted quietly. "But she's not my girl. Just my best friend."

"But you want her to be your girl," the girl surmised. Edward nodded. "So why did you never ask her out?"

Edward lifted a shoulder in a half-hearted shrug. "Figured it would get awkward if she didn't think of me that way. And I'd rather be her friend than nothing," he explained. She nodded in understanding.

"This is an awfully heavy conversation to have before proper introductions!" she exclaimed suddenly. "Well, everyone knows who you are because you're the new kid. But I'm Alice."

"Edward. But apparently you already knew that."

Alice nodded with a smile. "You look like you need a friend." She eyed him appraisingly, before adding, "And maybe a stylist. Lucky for you, I can be both!"

Edward wanted to protest, tell her that he didn't need either of those things, but she looked so pleased with her suggestion that he didn't have the heart to turn her down. Instead, he just sighed and placed his forehead back on his desk.

Taking that as tacit assent, Alice clapped her hands. "Great! We'll start on the makeover tonight."

For the next couple of weeks, Edward spent most of his time outside of school with Alice and his cousin Tanya. They made it their mission to "de-nerd" him; Edward didn't think there was anything wrong with how he looked or dressed, but the two of them disagreed. They ran him ragged, dragging him shopping, cutting his hair and trying to teach him how to style it.

When he needed a break from all the estrogen, Alice's boyfriend, Jasper, was available to join Edward to hike some of the many trails just outside of town. Unfortunately, Jasper was in college so Edward really only got to spend time with him on the weekends. The girls joined them a couple times, but usually it was just Edward and Jasper.

Though his days and afternoons were consumed by settling into his new school and his new friends, his nights were consumed with thoughts of Bella. He still hadn't been able to touch base with her, despite his best efforts. The text messages he'd composed sat in his inbox, red icons next to them indicating "Unable to Transmit". He'd managed to get enough cell reception to call her once, but it had gone straight to voicemail. He'd left a rambling message, telling her she'd love Alice and Tanya and Jasper, but how he wasn't having as much fun without her there to join him, and how much he missed her and hated not being able to talk to her, but she hadn't called back. Or if she had, he hadn't had reception and his phone didn't display the missed call and she hadn't left a voice message.

"Mom, I _need_ to talk to Bella! I promised her we'd still be friends and now she probably thinks I was lying and I abandoned her like her mom," Edward pleaded when the radio silence had extended to three weeks. "My phone gets jack-shit for reception up here and since the damn cable company screwed up, I can't reach her on Facebook or send her an email. I don't know what to fucking do!"

"Language, honey," Esme chastised gently, though she could understand her son's frustration. She hadn't expected their new home to be quite so...remote; the realtor she'd worked with had assured her the home was a short drive to town, but apparently the realtor's definitions of "short drive" and "town" were vastly different than Esme's. It took nearly an hour to get to the town, which, in addition to the hospital and school, boasted three restaurants, a general store, a church, and not much else. The nearest true city was Anchorage, a two hour trip which involved a ferry.

"I've sent her a couple of emails while I was at work, so she knows we're having technical difficulties up here. It'll be ok, darling. She'll still be there when we get the communication kinks worked out," she assured him. Edward gave her a dubious look, but trusted her to have his and Bella's best interests at heart.

Finally, the cable company showed up and connected their home internet and phone lines. Edward was fidgeting the whole time the man was there. He was desperate to get online and talk to Bella. He wanted to tell her about Alice and Tanya, and their attempts to style him. He wanted to tell her about Jasper, and the long hikes through gorgeous landscapes. But mostly, he wanted to tell her how much he missed her. How every time he sat next to Alice at school, he wished it were Bella. How the forests here reminded him of the forests in Washington, and of course, her.

After what felt like eons, the technician declared everything up and running. Edward barely suppressed his whoop of delight, and ran to his laptop to log into Facebook. He pulled up the site and logged in, going directly to send Bella a message that he was finally reachable again.

But when he started typing, the site wouldn't auto-complete her name. Confused, he tried to go to her page to see if he could write on her wall instead. But when he got to her page, the site declared they were no longer friends. He could see their mutual friends, but he couldn't see her wall, her pictures, anything.

He searched for the button to re-add her as a friend, but it wasn't there. The option to send her a message was also disabled. Tears sprang to Edward's eyes. Why would she have blocked him? Because he moved away? He thought he'd made it clear that they were friends no matter the distance. Apparently she hadn't felt the same way.

He sent an email to her, but he already knew deep down that she wouldn't respond. Defeated, he closed the lid of his laptop and stared, unseeing, out the window.

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: *winces* Sorry. It can only go up from here, right? I promise Bella will explain her thought process in the next chapter. **


	8. Chapter 8

The mind can go either direction under stress—toward positive or toward negative: on or off. Think of it as a spectrum whose extremes are unconsciousness at the negative end and hyperconsciousness at the positive end. The way the mind will lean under stress is strongly influenced by training.

~ Frank Herbert, _Dune_

o-o-o-o-o-o

**Age 18:**

"Feels good, doesn't it, Ducky?"

"Sure does, Kronk."

"Oh, stop rubbing it in, you two," Rose complained, casting a mock glare at her two best friends.

Bella and Emmett cast a glance at each other before sandwiching Rose between them in a group hug.

"Awww, Ratchet is jealous. Don't worry, one more year and you can join us big kids in the real world," Emmett teased, ruffling her hair.

Rose swatted at him playfully. "Shut up, Kronk."

"I'm gonna miss starting every morning with your scowling face, Ratchet," Bella teased.

"I'll Skype you every morning so you won't miss out," Rose promised, and they all giggled.

The three collapsed onto the grass in Rose's back yard, finally able to breathe easier now that the school year was over. For Rosalie it meant a few months of freedom before starting her final year of high school. For Emmett and Bella, it meant the end of their high school days, and moving on to new adventures in college.

"You gonna be ok without us, Ratch?" Bella asked, concern lacing her voice.

"Oh, Ducky. Don't worry. This isn't Fort Worth, and I have real friends here," Rose assured her, rolling onto her side and smoothing some hair back from Bella's face.

Bella gave her a small smile, but was still concerned for her friend. Rose may have a tough-as-nails exterior, but Bella knew that was mostly a defense mechanism to keep herself from being hurt again.

When Rose and her mom first moved to Seattle, into the Cullen's old home, Bella found the new girl's personality off-putting. She was still reeling from Edward's departure and didn't have the energy to try to see beneath the surface. But when Rose found Bella crying in the locker room one day after Lauren and her group had been particularly savage, taunting her that Edward had moved away just to escape her, Rose took down her guard and showed Bella her true colors.

She explained to Bella how at her old school, she'd been the epitome of the mean-girl. She'd ruled her group with scathing insults and ruthless teasing. She was dating one of the varsity hockey players, but she wouldn't go all the way with him, much to his displeasure. He began pressuring her, but she always managed to put him off.

One Monday, after she'd been out of town visiting her cousins, she showed up to school, only to be met with hostile glares and not-so-quiet whispers. She finally discovered that Royce had told everyone that she'd not only slept with him but with several other members of the varsity hockey team at an out-of-town party that weekend. She tried to correct the rumors, but the damage had been done.

She managed to make it through the remaining few weeks of the school year by keeping her head down and spending her lunch period hiding in the girl's bathroom. She had hoped the gossip would die down over the summer, but when Rose went back for her junior year, she only made it a few weeks before the taunts became completely unbearable. Apparently, the girl who had replaced Rose as Royce's girlfriend claimed she'd seen Rose going into the free clinic, and spread the story that Rose had gotten herself pregnant and then gotten rid of the baby. Rose was bordering on suicidal and her mom hoped a fresh start would help her start to heal. Her mom was able to get a transfer to Seattle, and that was how Rose came to be in Bella's life.

After moving to Seattle, she maintained a hard edge because she was afraid of trusting anyone too easily, since the people she had considered her friends had been quick to turn on her when they sensed weakness. But seeing the way Bella was being treated, knowing that at her old school she would have been doing the same thing, and now knowing what it was like to be on the other side of the ridicule, Rose felt she had found a kindred spirit in Bella.

They had formed a fast friendship, and often spent nights and weekends at each other's homes, lounging in their pajamas, watching Disney movies and eating ice cream.

The first weekend after Rose moved in, Bella had been surfing on Rose's Facebook page when she saw a picture of a cute blonde boy wearing a Fort Worth sweatshirt. "Who's this?" she asked, surprised to see Rose still friends with someone from her past.

Rose glanced at the screen, then went back to painting her toenails. "Jasper Whitlock. He was, like, the only decent person on the hockey team. He was a senior and he tried to defend me after the rumors started, but no one took his word over Royce's, since he wasn't at the party with the team. I think he ended up going to school in Alaska somewhere on a hockey scholarship."

At the mention of Alaska, Bella clicked into Jasper's profile and began clicking through some of his photo albums, inexplicably feeling like seeing pictures of someone in Alaska would make her feel closer to Edward. As if her thoughts conjured him, the next picture she clicked to was one of Edward himself, standing on an overlook and grinning her favorite grin.

Her heart clenched in her chest and she took in a shuddering breath. He hadn't gotten in touch with her since he left, and seeing him unexpectedly like this was like a punch to the gut. She'd tried to rationalize why he wouldn't have contacted her, telling herself that he was probably just busy settling into his new home, but she couldn't quite silence the inner voice - which sounded suspiciously like Lauren - that suggested he was relieved to finally be rid of her. It didn't help that her texts went unanswered and her calls went straight to voicemail.

She wanted desperately to just shut down the laptop and forget that she'd seen the picture, but morbid curiosity kept her clicking through the album. Since he wasn't updating his own page, she needed to see him, see what he'd been up to, what he'd been doing rather than keeping in touch with his purported best friend.

When she landed on a photo of Edward and Jasper with their arms wrapped around a petite brunette between them, her heart clenched. _Don't be ridiculous,_ she chastised herself. _They could just be friends._ She clicked to the next picture and was instantly relieved to see Jasper planting a kiss on the brunette girl. _See, you overreacted. That must be Jasper's girlfriend. No reason to be jealous. _

Bella felt slightly mollified and kept going through the album. She stopped short again when another picture of Edward with a girl appeared; this girl was thin but curvy, and gorgeous, with long blonde hair that was billowing behind her. Edward was carrying her piggy-back and she had her arms wrapped around him possessively. They both had glowing smiles on their faces.

Bella's heart sank, and the insidious voice in her head started up again. _Well, well, lookie there. Thought you had a chance with him, did you? Thought he'd come back to you once he was out of high school, you'd go to college together, get married, and have geeky little babies? He hasn't even been gone a month and he's already found himself a girlfriend who isn't a pathetic waste of space like you are. Your mom didn't even want you...why on Earth would you think someone like Edward would want you? Might as well face facts now and realize no one will ever want you. He's better off without you holding him back, so just do everyone a favor and don't make this awkward by clinging to someone who obviously has moved on to bigger and better things._

Rose noticed the change in Bella's demeanor, and when Bella explained, Rose tried to reassure her. Bella listened halfheartedly. On one level, she knew she was being ridiculous, that Edward wouldn't have pretended to be her friend for ten years. But, she also couldn't completely silence the doubts and insecurities that nagged at her.

Later that afternoon, she got an email from Esme, explaining how they were having issues getting phone and internet connections at their new home, but not to worry, they all missed her and loved her and would find a way to talk to her soon. _Yeah, right,_ the evil inner voice scoffed. _There's not a single place with wi-fi up there? _Her kinder inner voice piped in, though softer,_ Esme wouldn't lie to you. It's a huge transition for all of them, so just be patient. _She replied that she understood, and that she missed all of them as well. She wasn't quite ready to hear Esme confirm that Edward had found a girlfriend in Alaska, so she didn't mention seeing the pictures of Edward and the blonde, hoping to put off that confirmation as long as possible.

When she mentioned Esme's email to her dad over dinner that night, he had sighed heavily, giving her a look she could only read as pity. "Bella..." he began, his tone immediately setting off warning bells in Bella's head, "Now, I know this may not be what you want to hear, but...the Cullens have new lives in Alaska now. They're going to meet new people, experience new things, especially Edward. I want you to maybe try to accept that he won't always be your best friend." Bella gaped at him, but he continued, unperturbed. "With the age you kids are, he's going to make new friends up there, and he may keep in touch with you for a while, but eventually his new life is going to take over. I just want you to be prepared for that."

Bella had stammered for a moment, searching for some retort to her dad's hurtful words. Suddenly, realization dawned on her. "This is because of Mom, isn't it?" Charlie quickly shifted his gaze away from her accusing stare, so she knew she'd hit on something. "Edward and I are nothing like you and Mom!" she exclaimed. He opened his mouth to interject, but she rushed on. "No! Edward wouldn't just leave and never talk to me again. He's my best friend and that's not going to change, and I can't believe you'd try to compare him to Mom!"

"Bella!" he finally interrupted. "I didn't think your mom was the type to just up and leave without a word, either, but she did. And I knew her a hell of a lot longer than you've known Edward. So trust me when I say, I'm just trying to save you hurt down the road. I think it will save you a lot of pain and disappointment if you stop clinging to people who aren't here anymore, and move on with the people who are here."

Bella's arguments died in her throat. Hearing Charlie echo some of the very fears that gnawed at her made it much harder to pass those thoughts off as irrational. She dropped her gaze and slumped down in her chair, her appetite ruined.

A few days later, her phone chirped, indicating a new voicemail. It didn't display a missed call, so she listened to the message, trying to tamp down the hopes that the message would be Edward. Her heart soared when she heard his voice coming through the speaker, though his words were barely discernible through the static on the line. As the message played through, her heart sank with each word that she could make out through the background noise.

Though it killed her, she hit replay when the message finished, needing to confirm if she'd heard correctly the first time. As it played again, tears welled in her eyes as her insecurities were confirmed. "Bella! Alaska is better...expected...I met...girl...Tanya...love...fun...without you...I don't...miss...at all...yeah, um...bye."

With her dad's warnings echoing in her head, heartsick and crushed, Bella did the only thing she could think of - she set Edward free. She blocked him on Facebook and set about removing any trace of him from her page so that he wouldn't feel obligated to keep up the charade any longer.

When an email from him appeared a week later, she ignored it. She figured Esme had forced him to write her, to be polite, and she didn't want to read about his adventures with his new, gorgeous girlfriend. Rose tried to convince her she was overreacting, but Bella wouldn't hear of it.

He sent her a few more emails, as did Esme, but Bella deleted them all without reading them. It broke her heart, but she knew it would be even harder if she dragged it out. She knew eventually he'd lose interest in keeping in touch with her, and she rationalized that at least this way it was on her terms.

Bella was drawn from her dark musings by Emmett tickling her ribs. "Quit it!" she screeched, trying to twist away from his seeking fingers.

"You were a million miles away, Ducky! Had to get you back to Earth somehow," he teased, not slowing his fingers.

"Rose, help!" Bella gasped between shrieks and giggles. Rose grinned and dove into the fray, tickling Bella nearly as much as she was tickling Emmett.

Bella sprang to her feet to escape, and tried to catch her breath as she laughed at her friends writhing on the grass.

"Hey, we gonna go for a run before the party tonight, Kronk?" She asked, glancing at her watch.

Emmett stood, dusting off his jeans before turning and offering Rose a hand to help her up. "You know it."

While Bella and Rosalie had been fast friends, she'd taken longer to warm up to Emmett. He'd moved to town not long after Rose, and he and Bella had been assigned as partners on an English assignment. His size had intimidated her at first, and she'd been leery of being overly friendly with another guy after Edward. Even though they'd never been anything but friends and he'd obviously moved on, she felt like it was almost unfaithful to have another male friend.

But Emmett had been nothing but warm and genuine, and it was hard to resist his playful smile and infectious laugh. When he'd overheard Rose and Bella arguing over Bella's weight one day, he'd shyly interjected that he'd be happy to work out with Bella. He was already planning on going to college for sports medicine and personal training, and he felt like he'd be able to help Bella.

They'd started a routine of cardio and weight lifting, and Bella had been pleased as she started dropping pounds and toning. She finally started liking the person she saw reflected in the mirror, and she felt like the transformation was a metaphor for moving on in her life and not letting the past hold her back anymore. Though it wasn't always smooth sailing, she loved Emmett for always keeping her positive and guiding her on the journey.

"Are you guys still going to do your nightly runs in college?" Rose asked. She teased them for their unwavering enthusiasm - runs came before homework most nights - but she admired their dedication and even occasionally joined them.

"Depends on if Ducky here gets herself a boyfriend and abandons me," Emmett replied, ducking out of the way of Bella's hand as she tried to smack him.

"You know I'm not interested in having a boyfriend," she chastised. Rose's smile softened in sympathy. She knew that despite Bella's best efforts to write Edward out of her life, she still carried a torch for him.

Seeing Rose's expression, Bella gave her a reassuring smile. She knew Rose felt she'd cut Edward off too quickly, but Bella didn't want to rehash that old argument again. What was done was done, even if she still felt like part of her was missing.

She would never admit it to Rose or Emmett, but she'd actually applied to Anchorage late one night, thinking she might go try to find Edward. But when the acceptance letters came, she ultimately decided to go to the University of Washington with Emmett so she could stay close with her new friends and her dad.

"I'm not interested in having a boyfriend, either!" Emmett exclaimed, startling the two girls, but effectively diffusing the growing tension.

"Thank God for that," Rose drawled. Bella giggled, and the three of them headed out to prepare for the end of year party.

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: So...she had her reasons, as irrational as they may be. It's tough to think you're worth anything when people keep telling you you're not. **

**On a happy note, this should be the end of the teenage angst, and we get to work on getting these two back together. And maybe they'll actually communicate this time :) **


	9. Chapter 9

"The chief beauty about time is that you cannot waste it in advance. The next year, the next day, the next hour are lying ready for you, as perfect, as unspoiled, as if you had never wasted or misapplied a single moment in all your life. You can turn over a new leaf every hour if you choose."

~ Arnold Bennett

o-o-o-o-o-o

**Age 19 (Present Day):**

"Please, Bella?"

"Nope."

"Please?"

"No."

"Seriously, Bella, please."

Bella sighed and cast a withering glare at her roommate. "Seriously, Angela, no."

"Why not?" Angela whined.

Bella just huffed and turned back to her book. This was the third time this week Angela had brought up her Photomedia project. Bella had already bluntly turned her down more times than she could count, but Angela seemed hell-bent on not taking 'no' for an answer.

"I'll cut your face out of all the pictures so no one will know it's you. And no one will even see them except me and the professor. This project is 40 percent of my grade," Angela pleaded.

Bella rolled her eyes and studiously avoided eye contact. Angela plucked the book out of Bella's hands and sighed. "Bella, you're gorgeous. You have an amazing body. I need to do something with the human form. I swear to you no one will see them."

Bella sighed. "Can I think about it?" she acquiesced. Angela squealed and hugged Bella. "That's not a yes!" Bella laughed at Angela's exuberance.

"It's not a no!" Angela argued with a wide grin.

"It's not a no," Bella agreed, then grumbled teasingly, "Should have just gone for the single room. Would have saved myself all this drama."

"Shut up, you love me," Angela scoffed, tossing a pillow at Bella's head. Bella grinned but didn't argue. Truth was, she did love Angela.

She'd been nervous when she'd gotten her roommate assignment, worried that she'd end up with someone like Lauren from high school. But her fears had been unfounded. When Angela suggested watching Mystery Science Theater 3000 the first night they were on campus, Bella knew she'd found a kindred spirit. They formed a quick bond over their mutual love of cheesy sci-fi movies and lemon sherbet, and the rest, as they say, is history.

That night, Bella Skyped with Rose to get her perspective and advice about posing for Angela. After hearing Angela's proposal, Rose insisted Bella agree to be photographed.

"Think of it this way," Rose rationalized, "You've gone through this huge transformation with your body over the last couple of years. You hated the way you looked, and now you love yourself, right?" Bella nodded. "This is a way to document that. You get these gorgeous pictures of you looking amazing and sexy, and it's like one giant _fuck you_ to everyone who ever tormented you because you look more amazing than they can ever hope to."

"They'll never see them," Bella protested quickly, her heart-rate increasing at the thought of anyone seeing the photographs.

"Of course not, but you'll know. And that's all that matters. That you know that you're better than they tried to make you believe," Rose contended, soothing Bella's mild panic.

Bella considered Rose's words and allowed herself a small smile. "I'll need your help picking out the outfits," she murmured. Rose whooped when she realized what Bella's words meant.

"I'm so proud of you, Ducky. You really are gorgeous, it's time you realized it. Maybe when you see these pictures, you'll finally accept that fact," Rose said gently. Bella was doubtful. Years of feeling less than beautiful made her hesitant to accept that she was anything other than unattractive.

The next day, when Bella confirmed to Angela that she would pose for her, her shriek was almost deafening. "I swear you're going to love the pictures," Angela promised, pulling Bella into a tight hug.

"You take amazing pictures, Ang, I'm sure they'll look great."

They spent the next couple of days planning each shot, discussing poses and themes. Angela threw out terms like exposure and ISO that flew right over Bella's head, but she knew better than to argue with the master. She trusted Angela to keep everything tasteful.

That weekend, Rose drove up and joined Bella and Angela as they spent hours at the mall trying to find the perfect outfits.

"Just come out, Ducky," Rose huffed.

"Nope," Bella called from behind the fitting room door.

"Well will you open the door and let us see? You don't need to come out," Angela compromised.

"Nope," Bella sang, defiant.

"Ugh, then we're coming in!" Rose growled, grabbing Angela and flinging the dressing room door open.

Bella shrieked and attempted to cover herself. "What? No! Get out!"

"Nope," Rose taunted, settling herself onto the little bench in the room. "Ooh, I like that one," she cooed as she eyed Bella up and down. Bella's face flamed in embarrassment, and she looked beseechingly to Angela. She just shrugged, and settled in next to Rose.

"I hate you both," Bella muttered.

"Whatever. Now, this one's next," Rose said flippantly, picking up a hanger containing a delicate scrap of white lace and handing it to Bella. When Bella had tried on all the outfits, they tumbled out of the stall, giggling at the glare of the fitting room attendant.

The day of the shoot, Bella stood awkward and fidgeting in the studio Angela had rented. "I don't know if I can do this..." she fretted, worrying her bottom lip with her teeth.

"You can and you will," Angela insisted over her shoulder, shifting one of the lights. Bella tried to protest again, but Angela turned, all business, and pushed Bella into the first pose.

She was stiff at first, but as Angela worked, Bella began to relax. She moved so quickly from shot to shot that Bella didn't have time to obsess. Before she knew it, Angela was declaring the end of the shoot. "Seriously?" Bella breathed. At Angela's nod, Bella collapsed into a relieved heap on the bed.

"Wanna see some of them?" Angela offered.

"I don't know..." Bella hesitated.

"They turned out really, really well," Angela reassured her, turning the camera's screen towards Bella and flipping through a few of the raw shots. Bella had to admit, they really did look pretty spectacular. And true to her word, Angela had obscured or completely cut Bella's face from each picture.

Bella fingered the infinity charm on the necklace she still wore every day, and not for the first time, wondered what Edward would say if he could see her now.

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: This brings us full circle to chapter one :) **

**If you're interested, I have inspiration shots for Bella's calendar and necklace on my blog (link on my profile). **


	10. Chapter 10

The scariest thing about distance is that you don't know whether they'll miss you or forget you.

~ Nicholas Sparks, _The Notebook_

o-o-o-o-o-o

Edward dropped his backpack onto his desk chair and flopped onto his bed heavily. He considered throwing his arm over his eyes, then decided that would be too melodramatic, and settled for clasping his hands behind his head.

He'd resented his parents for a long time after they'd uprooted him from Seattle and transplanted him to Alaska. Logically, he knew that his dad's career took precedence over his friendships, but that hadn't made it any easier to leave behind the girl he loved, even if he'd never told her he was in love with her. Maybe that made it worse, since he'd missed his chance and was stuck with the _what-ifs._

Eventually, his anger had mellowed, eased by the friendship of Alice and Jasper, but he'd always felt as if a critical piece of him was missing. His failures felt insurmountable and his successes felt hollow when he wasn't able to share them with Bella.

In the week since stumbling across the calendar full of pictures of Bella, he'd been unable to concentrate. While sitting in lecture, rather than focus on the discussion of object oriented programming, his mind would wander to thoughts of her, both memories of the girl he had grown up with and questions about the woman she had become.

Obviously she'd gone through some fairly significant physical changes since the last time he'd seen her, but he wondered if she was still the same person inside. He wondered if she still sorted her M&amp;Ms by color and ate them in rainbow order; if she still insisted the original Star Wars trilogy was superior to the prequel trilogy; if she still would get so caught up in whatever book she was reading that she'd forget to eat dinner.

He was startled from his musings by Ben throwing a pillow at him. "Dude! Haven't you heard me calling your name for the last five minutes?"

"Obviously not," Edward growled, tossing the pillow back at Ben.

"What's got your panties in a wad?" Ben huffed, shoving Edward's backpack to the floor and settling himself into the desk chair.

Edward didn't feel like trying to explain the maelstrom of emotions swirling inside him, so he just huffed and turned back to stare at the ceiling again.

"Well aren't you just a ray of sunshine," Ben jibed. When Edward refused to rise to his bait, he sighed and leaned forward placing his elbows on his knees. "So, would you stop being so emo if I told you Angela and I are going to the Theta Xi party tonight?"

Edward raised an eyebrow at him. "Why would I care what you and Angela do?"

"Because Angela is bringing Bella with her," Ben replied smugly.

Edward bolted upright with wide eyes. "Are you serious?" He could barely contain his excitement.

Ben just nodded with a smirk.

"Holy shit," Edward breathed. He'd been trying to come up with a way to get in touch with Bella without putting Ben in an awkward position, but apparently his roommate was a step ahead of him. Then the gravity of the situation hit him and he panicked. "What time are you going? What should I wear? Does she know I'm going to be there? What if she doesn't want to see me?"

Ben's eyes were wide by the end of Edward's rapid-fire questions. "Dude, chill the fuck out. The way you reacted to that calendar I figured you'd just like the chance to meet her. Why are you so freaked out?"

Edward took a deep breath and scrubbed his hands over his face before admitting, "Because I've already met her. I lived next door to her when we were kids. She was my best friend, but we lost touch when my family moved to Alaska junior year."

"I don't get it. If you were such good friends, why wouldn't she want to see you again?"

Edward raked a hand through his hair in agitation. "I dunno, man. I thought we were ok when I left but as soon as I got online after we settled in, she'd blocked me on Facebook and she ignored my emails and phone calls. I've never been able to figure out why she just cut me off."

Ben let out a low whistle. "That's rough, man. So are you going to come with us or do you not want to risk a bad reaction?"

Edward only hesitated a moment before answering, "I'm coming with."

Ben nodded, "Ok, we're leaving at 9. You're on your own with what to wear, though."

Edward stuck his middle finger up at Ben, making his roommate snort out a laugh as he left the room. After Ben had shut the door to his own room, Edward flopped back onto his back and kicked his feet like an excited child. He resisted squealing like Alice usually did when she was excited, but only just barely.

After basking in his exuberance for a moment, he rolled off the bed and grabbed his phone, shooting a text to Alice requesting her help. She knew the whole story of Bella, and though she wasn't necessarily Bella's biggest fan because of the way she'd abandoned Edward, she knew Edward still harbored feelings for her, and she would do anything to see him happy.

She immediately called him. "As your self-appointed stylist, I'm begging you not to just wear a ratty tee-shirt and jeans," she pleaded. Edward laughed but he knew she was completely serious.

"It's a frat party, what else do you wear besides a tee-shirt and jeans?"

Alice huffed into the phone. "Well, I know this is going to be stressful for you, even though you're excited, so you should wear something that makes you feel confident..." Edward rolled his eyes, glad that she couldn't see him. "Don't roll your eyes at me, Edward Cullen!"

"How do you _do_ that?" he spluttered, glancing around the room as if she had planted cameras in his apartment.

"I just know you, and I know you think I'm ridiculous when it comes to clothes."

"Well if the designer shoe fits..." Edward teased.

"Shut up," she laughed. He could picture her sticking her tongue out at him and it made him smile.

"Honestly, I'd be most confident if I didn't stick out because I was wearing something weird. Which means wearing a tee-shirt like everyone else," he implored.

Alice sighed, but conceded, "Fine, but at least wear a button down or jacket over it. Oh! That leather jacket I got you for your birthday last year would be perfect! And try to do something with your hair, please?"

"No promises, you know it's got a mind of its own most days," Edward joked, making Alice giggle. "Besides, you know I mess with my hair when I'm stressed. So even if I get it to cooperate, I'll just mess it up right away again, anyway."

"Ugh, why did you even ask for my help if you're just going to ignore my advice and do what you want?" Alice groaned.

"Because I like to torture you?" Edward offered.

"Don't I know it," she grumbled. "So what are you going to do when you see her? Are you going to approach her? Let her approach you? Stare at her from across the room and hide when she looks your direction?"

"Probably that last one," Edward admitted.

Alice sighed. "You should at least say 'hi' to her. You can't just ignore her since the whole point of you going is so you can see her," she admonished gently.

"But what if she doesn't want to talk to me?"

"Then she doesn't want to talk to you and you know for sure that it's done. But, Edward, what if she _does_ want to talk to you?"

Ever since he'd moved, he'd dreamed of reuniting with Bella. Those dreams had ramped up in the past week since the reunion seemed that much more plausible. He couldn't stop his heart from hoping that they'd fall back into their easy friendship, or maybe even more. He'd tried to temper those hopes by reminding himself that it was entirely likely that she'd want nothing to do with him, but he couldn't help but dream of that best-case scenario.

" Ok, I promise I will wear that leather jacket, I'll try to keep my hands out of my hair, and I will at least say 'hi' to her," he stated. Alice squealed and Edward held the phone away from his ear until she'd quieted. "I've gotta go grab dinner then get ready."

"Ok, hon. Everything will work out the way it's supposed to, you know that, right?"

"Yeah," he muttered quietly. He just hoped things worked out the way he wanted.

"Well, let me know what happens," Alice chirped. "Good luck!"

"Aye, aye cap'n," Edward teased. "Talk to you soon. And thanks."

"Any time. Bye!"

He dropped the phone onto his mattress then faced himself in the mirror above his dresser.

"You can do this," he told his reflection with a firm nod. "You _have_ to do this."

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: Sorry if you got the ugly version before - FFn was mean :( But I loved your response to the last two chapters, even though there was a lot of rage - I love that you guys are so passionate about these two :)**

**How will this party go, do you think?**


	11. Chapter 11

No distance of place or lapse of time can lessen the friendship of those who are thoroughly persuaded of each other's worth.

~ Robert Southey

o-o-o-o-o-o

"Is that what you're wearing?" Angela asked, her disapproval obvious in her tone.

Bella glanced down at the Star Wars t-shirt she was wearing. It had the words "Come to the Dark Side. We have cookies," and there was a picture of Darth Vader holding a cookie; Bella thought it was hilarious. "What's wrong with what I'm wearing?" she asked defensively.

"Nothing's _wrong_ with it, per se, but don't you want to wear something...girlier?"

Bella gave a very un-ladylike snort. "Girlier? Me? Did you forget who you're talking to? Besides, you're the one insisting I come to this stupid party. I'm not interested in giving some drunk frat guy an eyeful."

Angela held her hands up in surrender. "Suit yourself. Ready to go? We're supposed to meet Ben there at 9 so we should probably head out."

Bella nodded, sliding her phone, ID, and some cash into her pocket. She didn't want to carry a purse around all night, so she was traveling light. As she and Angela strolled towards the Theta Xi house, she wished she had thought to grab a sweatshirt. The night was already cool, and bound to get even chillier as it got later.

As they approached the house, Bella could already hear the thumping bass of the music inside. She groaned quietly - she hated parties like this, but she'd promised Angela she'd spend at least an hour there. Apparently Ben was considering pledging next year and although Angela wanted to be there to support him, she didn't want to be there alone.

"I'm going to go look for Ben. You want to come with or do you want to hang out here?" Angela asked once they'd made it into the crowded front room. Bella glanced around and saw some of the girls from her Calculus class standing near the fireplace.

"Emmett said he would be here, too, and I see Bree and Charlotte over there, so I'll go say hi to them then look for Em. Good luck finding Ben in this mess."

Angela laughed then promised, "I'll come find you once I've got him. Want me to get you a beer?" Bella wrinkled her nose and shook her head; she wasn't big on drinking and the beer at frat parties was always terrible. Angela nodded then waved as she pushed her way towards the kitchen.

As Bella tried to squeeze through the crowd towards her friends, a strong grip on her elbow stopped her progress, spinning her around and into a firm male chest. "Well, well, well," he chuckled. "I knew you couldn't resist coming to see me."

Bella groaned and tried to yank her arm out away, but he was stronger than her and didn't loosen his grip. "Jake, leave me alone. I'm just here with Angela to support Ben."

"Nice try, Babe. If that were true, why are you alone and looking for me? Quit playing hard to get. You know you can't resist this," he smirked, flexing the bicep on the arm he wasn't using to hold her hostage. Bella rolled her eyes but Jake was too caught up in himself to notice.

They had biology together and Bella had made the mistake of sitting next to him the first day of class. She wouldn't usually have sat in the back where he was, but she'd gotten lost on the way to the lecture hall and stumbled in just as the professor began his lecture. She hadn't wanted to attract any attention by waltzing to the front in the middle of the lecture, so she slid quietly into the mostly empty back row.

She had shot a sheepish smile at Jake, and apparently that was all it took to convince him that she was desperately in love with him. When she'd moved to her preferred spot more towards the front of the lecture hall the next class, he'd followed. And he kept following, despite her insistence that she had no interest in him.

She'd completely forgotten he was a member of Theta Xi when she'd agreed to attend this party with Angela. Now she was wishing her friend hadn't been so persuasive. She already disliked events like this - she much preferred to just curl up in bed with a book - but Jake's presence would make the night absolutely unbearable.

"Jake, just leave me alone," Bella pleaded, tugging harder against his grip, turning her head to see if anyone noticed the way Jake was treating her. No one was paying them any attention, though, and the party was loud enough and crowded enough where they weren't yet drawing attention.

"Don't be that way, Babe," he chastised, leaning close enough for Bella to smell the alcohol on his breath. Her eyes widened and her breathing picked up in panic; with as persistent as he was sober, there was no telling what he'd do once his judgment had been impaired by a few drinks.

He must have taken her panic as arousal, because he leaned in even closer and used his free hand to brush her cheek. "That's right, Jake will make all your dreams come true," he murmured. Bella would have laughed in his face if she wasn't so worried about trying to get away from him.

"Let go, Jake," she insisted, attempting to twist out of his grip, frantically scanning the crowd for someone to help her. Abruptly he released her, and since she wasn't expecting the sudden loss of resistance, she stumbled back a few steps before landing unceremoniously on her behind.

Bewildered as to why he'd finally let go of her, she tried to swipe her hair out of her face to figure out what had just happened. She heard another male voice growl, "The lady asked you to let her go," then Jake shout, "Fuck you, dude," followed by a sickening crack and shrieks from everyone around them.

Bella scrambled to her feet just in time to see Jake looming over another man who was prone on the ground, clutching his jaw. The crack she had heard must have been Jake hitting him, and she flung herself between Jake and her rescuer to prevent Jake from hitting him again.

"Back the fuck off, Jake! I told you 'no', and you're just too stupid to hear anything other than what you want to hear. You touch me again and I swear to God I will call the police and report you for sexual assault," she seethed. His eyes flashed and for a brief moment she was worried that he'd hit her as well, but then the fire faded and he glanced around, realizing he was causing a scene.

"Stupid cock-teasing whore. You're not worth it," he muttered, before turning and stumbling out of the room. Bella glared after him before turning to thank her savior.

Her breath caught in her throat when a very familiar pair of green eyes met her own. She'd dreamed of seeing those eyes again since she was 16, but there was no way they could be in front of her right now. "Edward?" she breathed in disbelief.

"Should have let the wookie win," he groaned as he collapsed backwards.

o-o-o-o-o-o

The party was much more crowded than Edward had expected when he arrived with Ben that evening. His heart sank as he saw the mass of bodies congregated in the living room. Even if he were able to find Bella in this mess, it was so loud they'd have to shout to be able to hear each other. Definitely not ideal circumstances for a long-awaited reunion.

After parting ways with Ben so he could schmooze the current frat president, Edward wandered around the main floor for a while, nursing the soda he'd snagged from the kitchen. He kept his eyes open for Bella, but so far hadn't had any luck spotting her. Maybe she had changed her mind and didn't come to the party. The thought made his stomach churn; he had pinned all his hopes on seeing her again tonight.

After his third circuit through the main floor, Edward had given up hope. He'd seen Angela standing and chatting with a group of girls, but Bella wasn't with her. Resigned, Edward slumped against the wall by the fireplace, settling in to wait for Ben to be ready to leave. He was staring into his mostly empty cup of soda when a soft voice startled him from his reverie. "Edward, right?"

"Huh?" he grunted, meeting the eyes of a dark-haired girl who looked vaguely familiar. Another brunette girl was standing just behind her.

"Your name is Edward, right?" she repeated, lifting a hand to push her hair behind her ear in a self-conscious gesture. He nodded slowly, still not able to place her. "I'm Leah. We have physics together?" her voice lifted at the end, making her statement sound like a question.

"Oh, ok. I thought you looked familiar," Edward said, earning a brilliant smile from the girl. _Leah_, he corrected himself.

Realizing she hadn't introduced the girl hovering over her shoulder, Leah added, "This is my friend Vanessa." Vanessa raised her hand in a small wave and Edward lifted his chin in the typical male acknowledgment. He wasn't really in the mood to be social after the disappointment of not being able to see Bella, but Leah didn't seem to pick up on that.

"Have you started working on the friction lab, yet?" Leah asked. Edward quirked an eyebrow at her. She was at a frat party on a Friday night and wanted to discuss their physics homework?

She flushed slightly at his silent reaction, and glanced back at her friend. Vanessa raised her eyebrows meaningfully and made a _keep-going_ gesture with her hand. Leah cleared her throat and turned back to Edward. "I was just wondering, because I'm having a little trouble. I've heard you answer the professor's questions in lecture a few times and you're super smart, so I was wondering if you could maybe help me?"

"Uh, I guess? I've already got a study group set up, but you can join us if you want," Edward offered, not wanting to be rude.

"Oh," her face fell slightly before she squared her shoulders and soldiered on. "Well, yeah that could work. Can I get your number so we can set up a time to meet? But, um, usually I'm more of a _hands-on_ learner." At this, she placed a hand on the forearm Edward had crossed over his chest. "Do you think if the study group thing doesn't work out, you and I could get together and put some of the principles into practice?"

Edward glanced down at where she was touching him, then furrowed his brow at her, bemused. Who set up study groups at a frat party? He glanced around the room, trying to see if maybe someone had sent the girls over as a joke, but no one seemed to be paying them any attention.

As he was scanning the room, his eyes fell on a tall boy in the middle of the room. He was hard to miss, since he looked like an extra from a bad Hollywood frat movie; he was wearing a pink button down shirt with the collar popped, paired with a pair of garish madras shorts. Edward snorted and was about to turn his attention back to Leah and Vanessa when he noticed the boy was gripping the arm of a petite brunette.

From the angle he was standing, he couldn't see the girl's face, but her body language screamed discomfort. As Edward watched, he saw her try unsuccessfully to extricate herself from his grasp, and his protective instinct flared. Brushing past the two girls, he didn't even register their disgruntled expressions at his abrupt departure. He weaved his way through the bodies until he was behind the boy; just as he arrived he heard the girl pleading to be released. Fuming, he reached up and grabbed the elbow of the arm being used to hold the girl hostage.

As Edward had hoped, the boy released the girl, though he hadn't planned on her being so startled at her release that she tripped over her own feet and tumbled to the floor. Edward made a move to go help her up, but the frat boy blocked his path and glowered down at him. "What the fuck, man?"

Edward rose up to his full height, though even at 6 foot 2, he was several inches shorter than the boy in front of him. "The lady asked you to let her go," he growled, attempting again to move past him and help the girl to her feet.

"Fuck you, dude," the boy shouted, and before Edward realized what was happening, the boy had cocked his arm back and let his fist fly, connecting with a sickening crack on Edward's jaw. The unexpected impact laid him out flat.

The next few minutes were hazy. Edward vaguely heard angry voices above him, but the throbbing in his jaw was overwhelming and he couldn't focus on anything besides the pain. He heard his name called, and when he glanced up, he knew he must have been knocked loopy, because Bella was hovering over him. _That's odd_, Edward thought, bemused. _Why would she wear the Princess Leia bikini to a frat party? Isn't she cold? _He was just about to voice that question when his vision faded to black.

The next time Edward floated back into consciousness, he was sprawled across a bed in a dim bedroom. He groaned when his jaw throbbed in protest as he turned his head to inspect his surroundings. Definitely a guy's room, if the posters of scantily clad women on the walls were any indication, but not a room he recognized. The muted sounds of the frat party permeated his consciousness, and he realized he must be in one of the frat brother's rooms.

Edward sat up gingerly, pressing his hand against his aching jaw. He twisted so his legs hung off the edge of the bed and was just about to stand when the bedroom door swung open. His eyes shot towards the unexpected movement, and he winced at the bright light spilling into the room from the hall. The curvy form of a woman stood silhouetted in the doorway, though he was unable to make out her face in the shadows.

"Oh, thank God, you're awake," a musical voice said softly, her relief palpable. "And here I thought I was the one who was supposed to run headlong into impossible situations without considering the consequences."

Edward squinted, trying to make out her face, his mind racing. He had written off the earlier vision of her as a combination of his infatuated subconscious and the recent rattle to his brain, but the only person who he used to tease about rash decisions was... "R2?" He gasped incredulously.

The girl stepped into the room and as she neared the bed, Edward's eyes widened. Bella's face had changed and matured in the years since he'd last seen her, but he would recognize her anywhere. "Hello, 3PO," she murmured, a hesitant smile tugging at her lips.

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: Well, he didn't hide and she didn't run away. That's a good start, right?**


	12. Chapter 12

It's dreadful what little things lead people to misunderstand each other.

~ L.M. Montgomery, _Emily's Quest_

o-o-o-o-o-o

A taut silence descended on the dim bedroom. Edward and Bella gazed at each other, both of their minds whirling. Edward was trying to reconcile that the girl he'd taken a punch for was none other than Bella. Bella was in shock at seeing Edward after so long, not just in Washington, but on her college campus.

Just as Bella was about to ask Edward what he was doing here, Emmett burst into the room, booming "Where's the patient?" His sudden entrance jolted both occupants out of their stupor; Bella was so startled, she stumbled backwards again, like she had earlier in the evening. This time, though, Edward was there to catch her with gentle hands on her waist. Bella's hands flew to his shoulders to steady herself, and she let out a low gasp as sparks shimmered across her skin where Edward's hands pressed against her waist.

She watched, fascinated as his eyes darkened when she darted her tongue out to moisten her bottom lip. The silence that descended this time was charged, and Emmett glanced between the two, confused as to what he'd just interrupted.

"Ducky?" he called, breaking the spell. Bella twisted her head towards him and gave him a sheepish smile; she'd completely forgotten he was in the room with them. Realizing she was still entangled with Edward and his girlfriend would likely be very upset if she saw them in this position, she jerked her hands away and took a quick step back.

She cleared her throat in embarrassment and turned to face Emmett. "Kronk, this is Edward," she gestured towards the bewildered boy sitting on the bed. He lifted a hand in a half-hearted wave as Emmett moved further into the room.

Settling a protective arm around Bella's shoulders, Emmett grinned down at Edward, "So, you're the one who took a hit for my fair Bella, huh?"

Edward shrugged and tried not to let his disappointment show on his face. Of course Bella had found a boyfriend in the years since he'd left. She was beautiful, inside and out, and only a moron would pass up the chance to make her his. _A moron like me,_ he thought sullenly.

"Ducky said you passed out after taking that punch and asked me to take a look at you," Emmett continued, oblivious to Edward's internal musings. "I'm studying sports medicine and know what to look for with a concussion."

"Sure," Edward croaked, then cleared his throat. "Sure, knock yourself out."

Emmett chuckled at Edward's choice of words and pulled a flashlight out of his back pocket. "It's not a pen light, but it'll do in a pinch. How much have you had to drink tonight?"

"What?" Edward spluttered.

Emmett held up his hand in a soothing gesture. "I just need to know how much I need to compensate for alcohol effects," he explained.

Edward felt his ears heat in embarrassment, and was grateful the light in the room wasn't bright enough to reveal his blush. "I didn't drink anything tonight," he muttered, glancing at Bella who was watching the two of them nervously.

"Well, you seem pretty coherent," Emmett agreed, flashing the light in Edward's eyes and checking for dilation and focus. "Going unconscious isn't the best thing in the world, but I don't think you've got a concussion. But, since I'm not officially allowed to say that, if you start having symptoms of a concussion you should go to a real doc. Headache, vomiting, that kind of thing. Lucky you didn't drink anything since you might miss the symptoms otherwise."

He nodded his understanding as Emmett moved back to Bella, pulling her against his side again. Edward glanced between the two, and blurted the first thing that came into his head. "Who are Kronk and Ducky?" Emmett let out a loud laugh at the non sequitur and Bella cast her eyes to the ground, trying to hide her grin.

"When I met Bella she was so shy, hated the way she looked," Emmett explained. When Bella began to protest, he cut her off and kept going, "She couldn't see her own beauty, but I saw it. She reminded me of that kid's story, y'know, The Ugly Duckling? Where the other ducklings pick on it 'cause it looks different? Then it grows up to be a beautiful swan, and they're all ashamed of the way they treated it. That's what I saw in Bella. She just needed help finding her inner swan." He grinned down at her and she couldn't resist returning his smile, not when he said such sweet things.

Sighing, she let out a rueful laugh and bumped Emmett's hip with hers. "I hate when you tell that story, you sap." She turned to Edward, her eyes sparkling with mirth. "Emmett's is a much better story, though. We had just become friends, and he insisted he come join me and my friend Rose at one of our movie nights. What he didn't realize was that we were watching Disney movies. That night was The Emperor's New Groove, and as soon as Kronk came on screen we died; he fit Em so perfectly it was scary. Big and dopey, but a heart of gold. It made the movie so much better imagining Emmett doing everything Kronk did - especially when he was singing his own mission impossible music sneaking around the city at night," she finished, grinning up at him.

"Shut up, I'm nothing like him. You know he's nowhere near as buff as me," Emmett retorted, flexing his biceps comically. Bella snorted and turned to Edward. Her smile faltered when she saw the heartbroken expression on his face.

As he'd listened to the stories of their nicknames for each other, Edward couldn't deny how happy they looked together. When he'd found the calendar, he had convinced himself that having Bella in his life again, in any capacity, was good enough. Now, seeing her playfully interact with her boyfriend, he wasn't sure he could survive watching their happiness. Feeling masochistic, he asked quietly, "H-how long have you two been together?"

Having misunderstood Edward's question, Emmett pondered, "I moved to Seattle, what, November of junior year?" He looked at Bella for confirmation, but she was watching Edward with a puzzled gaze. He had a look of pure anguish on his face, and she couldn't fathom what had put it there.

"Edward?" she called quietly, but he wouldn't meet her eyes. He could do the math; based on what Emmett said, she'd moved on and replaced him almost immediately after he'd left. That stung. He knew he was on the edge of losing his composure, and the last thing he wanted to do was cry in front of Bella and her boyfriend.

He cleared his throat and stood up, keeping his eyes trained on the floor. "Well, I'm glad you found someone who could see how amazing you are, Bella. Maybe I'll see you around campus," he said half-heartedly.

He made to move around the couple, but Emmett's startled laugh stopped him. "Whoa, man, my bad. No, no, no. Ducky and I have never been more than friends," he clarified. "As awesome as she is, it'd be like dating my sister."

Edward glanced up and saw nothing but sincerity in Emmett's face. Casting his eyes at Bella, she just looked confused. "I thought you had a girlfriend?" she blurted, a flush infusing her cheeks at her impetuous question.

Edward's hand came up to rake nervously through his hair, settling at the nape of his neck. "Uh, no?" he squeaked. "Why would you think _that_?"

"I'm out," Emmett interrupted, startling both Bella and Edward. His eyes had been bouncing back and forth between them during their awkward exchange, and he realized that not only had they once again forgotten that he was in the room, but this was definitely not a conversation he should be a part of. "You two have fun figuring this one out. Ducky, don't forget our Skype date with Ratchet tomorrow morning."

Bella nodded at Emmett, and gave him a quick hug. "Good luck," he whispered in her ear, too low for Edward to overhear. She gave him a grateful smile as she pulled back and he gave her shoulder a reassuring squeeze. Emmett shot Edward an indecipherable look over her shoulder before giving a quick salute and heading out of the room, shutting the door gently behind him. They both watched him leave before turning to face each other, unanswered questions hovering between them.

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: I had an awesome day today and thought I'd share the love with an early chapter. Also, I'm a little afraid of the cranky reviews I might have gotten if this was your Wednesday update ;) **

**See you Wednesday!**


	13. Chapter 13

Well, we all make mistakes, dear, so just put it behind you. We should regret our mistakes and learn from them, but never carry them forward into the future with us.

~ L.M. Montgomery, _Anne of Avonlea_

o-o-o-o-o-o

After Emmett's departure, the silenced pressed in on them again, heavy and awkward. This was not at all how Edward imagined his reunion with Bella going. "So, uh..." he started hesitantly. "What made you think I have a girlfriend?"

Bella gave him an incredulous look. "Your voicemail?" She answered, her tone dripping with derision. At the bewildered look on Edward's face, she clarified, the remembered pain manifesting as venom in her voice. "You know, the one you left after not talking to me for almost a _month_ where you said you'd met a _girl_ and you were _in love_ with her, and you were having _so much_ _fun_ without me, and you didn't miss me at _all_? There was a lot of static, but I got the gist."

Edward's eyes were nearly bugging out of his head by the time Bella had finished her tirade. "W-what?! I _never_ said _any_ of that stuff. I talked about the people I'd met up there, and how you'd love them, but I wasn't having fun without you being there with me, and that I missed you to the point of pain," he rushed to explain, his voice cracking on the last word.

His obvious distress instantly cooled the fire in Bella's veins, and her posture slumped. "But... I saw the picture of you with her," she insisted weakly.

"Picture? What picture? Where did you see a picture of me with a girl?"

Though she'd always questioned whether she'd made the right call separating herself from Edward, this conversation was doing nothing to bolster her confidence that it had been a sound decision. Bella groaned and scrubbed her hands over her face, dropping heavily onto the bed. Edward settled on the edge next to her and waited for her to answer. Finally, she pulled her hands away from her face, staring at the ceiling as she spoke.

"After you moved, Ratchet moved into your old house, and we became friends. I was surfing her Facebook one day and was checking out her friend's page and saw pictures of you with a girl. It just looked like she was your girlfriend..." she trailed off.

Edward's mind was reeling, trying to sift through all the revelations of the past few minutes. He decided to ask the easiest questions first. "Who's Ratchet and why does her friend have pictures of me on Facebook?"

"Oh, right, you don't know Ratchet. Her real name's Rose. We call her Ratchet because she likes to work on cars and one day when Emmett pissed her off, she threw her wrench at his head. He won her over eventually though...Anyway, I think she said his name was Jasper?" Bella explained.

"Ohh," Edward breathed in realization, before confusion set in again. "So you saw pictures of me with Jasper and concluded I had a girlfriend?"

Bella huffed a self-conscious laugh, and corrected him, "No, the picture was of you giving a piggy back ride to a pretty blonde girl. I dunno, it just looked like the kind of thing a boyfriend would do. And then I got the voicemail that made it sound like you had found someone, so...I put two and two together."

Edward wracked his brain for any time Jasper would have taken pictures of him with a girl. Tanya and Alice had tried to set him up on dates during high school, but he'd flat out refused; he knew he'd left a piece of his heart behind when he'd left Bella, and it wasn't fair to the girls when he couldn't give them his whole heart.

"I don't...I can't think of any time I would have given a blonde girl a piggy back ride," he admitted. Bella shrugged a shoulder, embarrassed at having to admit all of this, especially after the revelation that Edward did not, in fact, have a girlfriend. He pulled out his phone and opened the Facebook app, going to Jasper's albums from when Edward had first moved to Alaska. He scrolled through the pictures, trying to find any instance of him with a girl.

Suddenly, he threw his head back and laughed. "This picture?" he chuckled, turning the phone so Bella could see the screen. She glanced up and saw the same picture that had broken her heart. Tears sprang to her eyes at his flippant reaction; how could he be so callous? She nodded feebly, feeling a traitorous tear slide down her cheek.

"Hey, why are you crying?" Edward whispered, shocked by her reaction. Bella scrubbed the back of her hand under her eyes and refused to meet his gaze. "Bella, I'm sorry, I wasn't laughing at you. It's just...that's Tanya. She's my _cousin_," he explained hurriedly.

At his words, Bella clenched her eyes shut, more tears leaking out of the corners as her mind raced to comprehend this revelation. _But 'Tanya' was the name he said in his voicemail. Oh my God, his cousin? I let a staticky voicemail and a picture of his cousin convince me to cut him out of my life? _

"R2, what's wrong?" Edward couldn't understand Bella's reaction. He'd gotten the impression she would be happy he didn't have a girlfriend, but her continued tears suggested otherwise.

"Oh God, 3PO," she sniffled, "I'm so sorry."

"What? Why?" he asked, bewildered. His heart broke seeing her unhappy, feeling like he was the root of the distress, and he couldn't resist the urge to pull her into his arms. "Shh, it's ok. It's no big deal," he soothed, rubbing her arm gently.

"It _is_ a big deal," Bella insisted. Now that she realized the colossal error she'd made in her assumptions, she was mortified. Taking a deep breath, she knew she needed to tell him the truth. The words came slowly at first, then tumbled out faster and faster. "It's a big deal, because I saw that picture and thought you had a girlfriend. Ugh, and then that voicemail that I apparently _really_ misheard. And then Lauren said...well...you know Lauren...and you had left, just like Mom, and I know it wasn't your fault but I couldn't quite separate the two no matter how hard I tried. Then when I talked to Dad he made the same comparison to Mom and told me it would probably be easier if I didn't hold on too tightly to people who were never coming back. Plus you never dated anyone here, and you'd only been gone a couple weeks and already seemed to have found someone there, so I figured it must have been because I was holding you back while you were here. So I just...let you go."

"You let me go..." Edward repeated slowly, trying to make sense of her rambling words. Suddenly, the pieces fell into place and he stiffened as realization dawned. "Is that why you blocked me on Facebook and ignored my emails?"

Ashamed, Bella nodded and dropped her head so her hair swung to cover her face.

"You...over...but..." Edward stammered, his mouth unable to keep up with his racing thoughts. He leapt to his feet and began pacing the floor as his hands raked agitatedly through his hair. He couldn't believe what he was hearing - was she seriously telling him that she'd stopped talking to him because she thought she'd been holding him back? Well, not entirely, there was a whole lot of other stuff in that rambling explanation, too.

He couldn't really blame her for the comparison to her mom; he'd promised he'd always be there, and it had killed him that he'd broken that promise, no matter that it was involuntary. And then the not talking to her thing...he recalled how frantic he'd been when he couldn't seem to get the technology in Alaska to cooperate, but his mom had told him she'd talked to Bella and all was well, so he'd thought that was enough and he had let himself relax a little. Apparently that was the wrong thing for him to do.

But then he'd called her, and she'd never called back. Ok, so apparently the connection was shit and the message she got was, like, the exact opposite of the message he had tried to leave. But the emails - he'd sent her emails, and she'd never replied. His mom, too. Then he'd tried letters, and they came back, unopened. He was hurt, but he wasn't masochistic, so he stopped trying, getting her message loud and clear.

But the girlfriend thing came out of left field. She'd never given him any indication that she'd felt more for him than platonic friendship. Had she? Could he have possibly been that blind? She certainly made it sound as if he was. Could this all have been avoided if he'd just _told_ her he liked her? _Fuck._

Bella could hear him muttering furiously, but couldn't make out any words. Finally he stopped pacing, coming to stand right in front of her.

"Look at me," he ordered gently. Grudgingly, Bella raised her eyes to meet his burning gaze. When their eyes finally met, he started addressing her speech, "I'm sorry I had to leave, and I'm sorry it brought back feelings of your mom leaving. The last thing I ever wanted to do was cause you pain, and I failed at that. And I'm sorry I didn't talk to you for, like, ever. But Mom said she'd sent you emails and you understood we were having trouble with phone reception and internet stuff - "

"I lied," Bella admitted, interrupting him. "I mean, I didn't think she'd lie to me, so I said I understood you guys were having troubles, but then a few days later I got that voicemail, so I figured, at least on your part, the lack of communication was intentional."

Edward shook his head vehemently. "Never. I was frantic to get in touch with you, but it was like the universe was conspiring against me. I don't even want to know what Lauren said to you, because she's a hag, and nothing she ever said about you was even remotely close to true. But, do you know why I never dated anyone here?"

Bella shook her head, and he continued, "You were right about one thing - it was because of you." At his words, Bella's heart clenched, her deepest insecurity confirmed. Tears welled in her eyes again and she dropped her chin to her chest with a choked sound of anguish.

Edward slipped a finger under her chin and forced her eyes to meet his again. "It was because of you," he repeated softly. "I didn't date because I couldn't imagine there was anyone more amazing than my best friend. I didn't date because I wanted to date you, but I was afraid to ruin our friendship if I asked you out and you said no. I didn't date because there was no one I wanted more than I wanted you."

By the time Edward had finished his little speech, tears were streaming down Bella's face. "Oh, God," she choked, burying her face in her hands. Edward swallowed heavily, nervous now that he'd revealed his feelings.

Finally, Bella lifted her face, her red-rimmed eyes meeting his soft green gaze. "There was no one I wanted more than you, either," she confessed, so softly Edward wasn't sure he'd heard her. "And I know there's no one more amazing than you. But I _broke_ that. Oh, God. I just..cut you off for no fucking reason." Suddenly her eyes widened. "Why are you still here? You should run as far away from me as possible. I'm a stupid, cruel, pathetic excuse for a human being."

"Hey," he interrupted, his voice harsh. Bella flinched at his tone, dropping her eyes to the floor and wrapping her arms around herself protectively. "Ok, so it was a shitty thing to do. But you're not stupid, or cruel, and you're definitely not pathetic. Am I the kind of person who would be friends with someone like that?"

"No," Bella admitted. "But you probably didn't know; I mean, _I _didn't know I could be such a bitch. God," she shook her head, fresh tears sliding down her cheeks. "How can you even stand to look at me? I would completely understand you never wanting to speak to me again now that you know why I did what I did..."

"Oh, R2," Edward murmured, cupping her jaw gently in his hand and brushing her tears away with his thumb. "I have spent the last two years _wishing_ I knew what the fuck I did wrong. Honestly, I'm a little relieved it was a stupid misunderstanding. I just...want you in my life. I'll always want you in my life. It's always been you."

Bella blinked owlishly at Edward's declaration. She'd heard his words, but was having a difficult time accepting their meaning. _He should be screaming at me and storming out of the room, not wiping away my tears and smiling at me,_ she thought incredulously. As the sounds of the party drifted up the stairs, Edward smiled gently, knowing this was not the right setting for further discussions.

"You wanna get out of here? I can walk you home, and we can catch up somewhere that doesn't have mostly naked women staring at us," he offered.

Still trying to wrap her head around Edward's admission, Bella nodded slowly. "Sure...just let me..." she gestured towards the bathroom, and Edward nodded his understanding. After splashing some cool water on her tear-stained face, she and Edward made their way back downstairs. It felt like they had been upstairs for an eternity, but the party was still in full swing.

They wove their way through the throng of people to find their friends to let them know they were heading out. They found Emmett first, a beer in his hand and a pretty blonde girl clinging to his other arm. Bella raised her eyebrow at him, but he rolled his eyes and made a face, suggesting the attention from the girl wasn't welcome or reciprocated.

Edward awkwardly shoved his hands into his pockets as Emmett pulled Bella into a hug. "Be safe, Ducky," Emmett whispered. "If he hurts you again, I'll kill him."

"Thanks, but totally not necessary. I'll give you and Rose the full story later," Bella promised. "And stay away from Sorority Barbie. I'll help Ratchet throw things at you if you don't."

Emmett laughed and pinched Bella's waist, causing her to squeal and twist out of his grasp. When she turned back towards Edward, he was regarding her with a pensive, almost sad expression on his face. She didn't quite know how to interpret his look, so she announced, "Ok, I just have to find Angela now."

Edward nodded, and agreed, "That works out since she's probably with Ben and he's the one I'm looking for." At Bella's confused expression, he gripped the back of his neck in a nervous gesture as he explained, "Ben is my roommate."

Bella didn't know quite what to make of that revelation. "Huh. Small world," she offered lamely before heading back into the crowd. Edward's shoulders sagged in relief at having dodged some potentially tricky questions for the time being, and he followed her to find their friends.

When they found Ben and Angela, they were talking to a group of people that included the girls who had come up to Edward earlier in the night and a few other people Edward didn't recognize.

"We're gonna take off," Edward announced to Ben, who gave him a salacious grin; Edward just rolled his eyes. Angela glanced at Bella, and she nodded in confirmation, the two sharing a secret smile.

"Aren't you the guy who Jake punched earlier?" one of the girls in the group piped in, making Edward cringe. Angela glared at the girl but she seemed unphased.

"He didn't exactly introduce himself," Edward replied sarcastically, lifting a hand and rubbing his jaw reflexively.

"That took serious cojones, dude," one of the guys praised, raising his hand for a fist bump, as several of the others nodded.

Edward awkwardly bumped his fist against the boy's, grumbling, "Someone had to stop him from being such a total douche canoe. Anyway, we're out. See you later, Ben."

"Wait!" Leah called as Edward started to turn away. He glanced back at her, confused by her outburst. "We need to finalize those plans to study friction," she explained, innuendo dripping from her voice as she shot a challenging look at Bella.

Edward rolled his eyes. "I told you, I've got a group. You can meet up with us after next lecture if you really want to."

Leah pushed her lip out into what she hoped was a sexy pout. "Can I have your number in case I have questions if I start working on it before the group meets?" she tried again.

"Uh..." Edward stalled, glancing at Bella with a flustered look on his face. Bella bit her lip, nervous as to how he would respond to the girl. It was obvious to Bella that the girl wasn't really interested in working on homework, but she wasn't sure how Edward would react. Despite his words upstairs, she was still insecure when it came to him and his feelings for her.

Finally, Edward seemed to reach a decision, "We usually just use the class message boards. Just meet up with us after lecture Monday. Bella, you ready?" At her nod, he placed his hand on the small of her back and guided her away from the group. Leah scowled at Bella's back as they departed, crossing her arms in irritation.

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: *deep breath* Everyone ok so far? I know you've all been anxiously awaiting this talk. That Edward is a good guy, huh?**


	14. Chapter 14

I wondered if that was how forgiveness budded; not with the fanfare of epiphany, but with pain gathering its things, packing up, and slipping away unannounced in the middle of the night.

~ Khaled Hosseini, _The Kite Runner_

o-o-o-o-o-o

The cool evening air washed over them as they stepped out of the house and onto the now-quiet lawn. Bella wrapped her arms around herself as a slight breeze blew past, cursing herself for not thinking to grab a sweatshirt when leaving her dorm.

"Here," Edward offered from behind her, shrugging out of his jacket and settling it around her shoulders. "It's chilly tonight."

"Oh, no, then you'll get cold," Bella protested, trying to remove the jacket and hand it back to him.

Edward clasped his hands on her shoulders and Bella shivered when his breath washed over her skin as he leaned forward and spoke into her ear, "I insist. Mom would kill me if she found out I let you walk home without a coat."

Bella nodded, her throat too dry to form words. She'd thought the years would have diminished her reaction to his proximity, but apparently she'd been wrong. They began walking towards campus and Bella slipped her arms into the sleeves of the coat, reveling in the lingering heat from Edward's body.

Trying to be surreptitious, she ducked her nose into the collar of the jacket, inhaling Edward's scent. He'd never been one to wear much cologne in high school, and Bella was pleased to find that hadn't changed. The jacket smelled like leather, laundry detergent, and pure Edward. It smelled like home. Bella couldn't contain her grin as she tucked her hands into the pockets and strolled next to Edward.

"So where are we headed?" Edward asked, tucking his hands into his back pockets.

"Elm," Bella replied, trying not to stumble as his t-shirt stretched taut across his chest.

"Really? I'm in the Cedar Apartments," Edward beamed. "We're practically neighbors."

Bella couldn't help but smile at his enthusiasm. "We'll have to get lunch or something," she suggested, then froze, realizing she shouldn't assume he'd want to spend any time with her.

"I'd like that," he agreed, his smile turning shy.

At his change in demeanor, Bella's steps faltered. "Edward," she murmured, swallowing past the lump that had formed in her throat.

He hadn't noticed she'd stopped moving, and a look of concern flashed across his face when he turned at her voice and saw she was several paces behind him. Bella fidgeted with the hems of the jacket sleeves as she tried to find the right words.

"I don't...you apologized for a lot of things that weren't your fault. But you have absolutely no reason to apologize to me. But me...I can't...I can't possibly apologize enough for cutting you out of my life. You were alone in a new place and all I could think of was my own selfish insecurities. You were the best friend I could ever ask for, and I just...threw it away. I don't deserve your forgiveness. But...I miss...I mean...if you think...if you think you could ever forgive me enough where we could be...maybe not friends...but...friendly? But, I totally understand if you don't want to give me that chance again..." she rambled nervously, keeping her eyes trained on the ground in front of her.

The scuffed toes of Edward's shoes entered her line of sight and Bella slowly raised her eyes, holding her breath as she waited for his response.

"R2..." he sighed, reaching up and tucking a loose tendril of hair behind her ear, letting his thumb trace the shell of her ear. Bella's breath caught at the surprisingly intimate gesture, trying to squash down all of the fairy tale hopes that were threatening to leave her empty and broken if they proved to be unfounded.

"I'm not gonna lie, it killed me when you blocked me. And it's sucked not talking to you for the last two years. I spent months agonizing over what I had done wrong. But now? Knowing that it all could have been avoided? I am so fucking pissed..." he trailed off, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"I know, you have every right to be, and I can't tell you how sorry - " Bella started, her voice thick as she tried to hold back the grief of knowing she had sabotaged her own happiness.

"Stop," he whispered vehemently. When he was convinced she wouldn't continue her apology, Edward continued. "I'm not pissed at you. I'm pissed at _me_. If I had just had the balls...I was so scared I'd lose your friendship if I _did_ tell you how I felt about you, and I ended up losing you because I _didn't_ tell you." He huffed a humorless laugh. "How's that for irony?"

It took all of Bella's self control to swallow the apology trying to bubble out of her; she knew he wouldn't want to hear her apologize yet again. "You didn't lose me. I may have stopped talking to you, but...I never stopped thinking about you," she said instead, so quietly Edward wasn't sure he'd heard her properly. He searched her face, trying to discern if he had heard her correctly or if his imagination was playing tricks on him.

"Really?" he finally asked, his voice low so as not to break the tenuous bubble that had settled over them. "So not lost...just...detoured?"

Bella nodded, a timid smile tugging at her lips. "Something like that," she confirmed. A wide smile spread across Edward's face, and she couldn't help but match his grin.

"I missed you," he whispered, reaching up to cradle her face in his hand.

"I missed you, too. So much," she agreed. Then her guilt gnawed at her again, and she had to try to apologize one more time. "I'm _so_ sorry. I can't believe I was so stupid -"

"R2," Edward admonished. "I'll forgive you for overreacting if you forgive me for being a pansy and never letting you know how I really felt about you."

Bella scoffed, "But I did that, too! If I had just told you -"

Her words were cut off when Edward leaned in and brushed his lips across hers, feather light, barely a caress but enough to shock her into silence.

She stared at him, suddenly breathless, waiting for her brain to catch up. The side of Edward's mouth quirked up in a shy smile. "How about we say we we're both sorry and call it even?" he murmured, brushing his thumb over her cheekbone gently.

Bella just gaped at him, her mind completely blank. Edward had kissed her. _Kissed_ her. After everything she'd told him, he'd _kissed her_.

Edward smiled at her reaction, relieved she hadn't slapped him for his forwardness. "I've wanted to kiss you again since that time we kissed when we were 8," he admitted shyly.

"Really?"

Edward nodded. He could feel a blush spreading up the back of his neck at the awkward admission, and he fidgeted uncomfortably under Bella's bewildered gaze.

"But...after _everything_...you still...?" she stammered, unable to comprehend how he could ignore her confessions.

Edward sighed. "Ok, let's start over," he suggested. He took a step away from her and held his hand out formally, a playful gleam in his eyes. "My name is Edward Cullen, and my favorite animals are tigers."

Bella couldn't help the smile that twitched the corner of her lips at the reminder of how they'd met. Unable to deny him, she placed her hand in his. "My name is Bella Swan. My favorite animals are Cullens."

Edward's grin was brilliant as he squeezed her hand gently. "That's not what you said before," he teased gently.

"A girl has a right to change her mind," Bella sniffed haughtily, her eyes twinkling.

"Those aren't even real animals," he scoffed, channeling his 5 year old self.

Bella grinned, remembering how indignant he'd been all those years ago. "They _could_ be," she insisted.

Edward stepped closer, his face serious again, and Bella's throat went dry. "Bella, I know you're beating yourself up about everything, but really, I'm just...so fucking relieved. We both fucked up, and we're both sorry, right? So...can we call it even? I missed you so much. I just...want you in my life again."

Bella searched his face for any anger, any hint that he was holding back his true reaction to her revelations, but all she found was sincerity and hope reflected in his warm green eyes. "I can't promise I won't beat myself up, because I hate what I did to you, but...I can try," she agreed.

"Good. So, um, in the interest of full disclosure," he started, his eyes bouncing around nervously, and Bella's heart clenched in apprehension. "I don't want to be your friend." Bella's eyes widened and she sucked in a shocked breath at his words. He saw the horrified look on her face and quickly backtracked. "I mean I don't want to be _just_ your friend." She regarded him warily, and he sighed, scrubbing his hand over his face. "Wow, I fucked that up." He laughed humorlessly, before repeating, "I don't want to be _just_ your friend. We wasted so much time in high school. I want to...be with you. As more than friends." He gave her a hopeful smile. "And I _really_ want to kiss you again."

Bella flushed under his intense gaze. How could she turn him down, when he was offering her exactly what she'd wanted for as long as she could remember? She stepped closer to him, slipping her hands up over his shoulders, clasping her fingers at the nape of his neck. "Okay," she breathed.

Now it was Edward's turn to be breathless. His nerves still sang with electricity from the brief kiss earlier, and Bella's hands left trails of fire in their wake as they moved over his shoulders and neck. She was exactly where he'd wanted her since he hit puberty, and it was taking all of his self control to not crush her body against him and devour her.

_Slow,_ he reminded himself. _This is Bella. Savor it. _

He lifted his hands so that he was cradling her face again, searching her eyes; for what, he wasn't quite sure. Affirmation that she wasn't just humoring him, maybe. But as their gazes met and held, all he saw was warmth and desire.

Leaning in slowly, giving her a chance to change her mind, Edward pressed his lips against hers again. At the contact, Bella let out a contented sigh, parting her lips under his. She had imagined this for so long, wondered what it would be like to have Edward's mouth on hers, but all of her dreams paled in comparison to the reality.

Edward tried to go slow, to savor the moment. Really, he tried. But with the way she threaded her fingers through his hair, the way she pressed closer against him, the way she whimpered in the back of her throat as he pressed his lips against hers, the fact that this was _Bella_, and she was finally in his arms the way he'd always dreamed, he was lost.

He slid one hand back to cup her neck and dropped his other to rest between her shoulder blades, pressing her tightly against his chest. Bella gasped at his increased urgency, and he took her parted lips as an invitation to press his tongue tentatively against her lower lip.

She eagerly darted her tongue out to meet his, and they both groaned at the contact. Just as Edward was about to deepen the kiss further, an obnoxious voice called out, "Yeah, dude! Get it!" followed by several laughs and catcalls.

Edward groaned at the intrusion, wrenching his lips from Bella's and resting his forehead against hers. He noticed her chest was heaving with each breath, just like his, and he couldn't help but feel a little smug that he'd affected her that much.

"I should get you home," he finally murmured once their breathing had returned to a relatively normal pace. Bella stuck her lip out in a pout, and Edward couldn't resist dropping another quick kiss to her lips.

"But we were doing such a good job of making up for lost time." She knew she sounded like a child with her whining, but she just wanted to keep kissing him. This was all so surreal to her, and she was half-afraid that she'd wake up in the morning to find out she'd dreamt the whole night, so she figured she might as well get as much from the dream as she could.

"Bella," Edward laughed softly, brushing his knuckles across her cheek and down the side of her neck, eliciting a delicate shiver from her. "I just got you back, and I don't plan on ever letting you...detour...again. We have all the time in the world."

"Promise?"

"Promise."

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: I think it's high time these two have some fun, don't you? See you Wednesday!**


	15. Chapter 15

He fell silent. For several moments they all did, and the quiet had the feel of a deliberate thing. Then Eddie said, "All right, we're back together again. What the hell do we do next?"

~ Stephen King, _The Dark Tower_

o-o-o-o-o-o

"Kronk tells me you had quite the adventure last night."

Bella cast a baleful glare over her shoulder at Emmett, who was sprawled on her bed flipping through an issue of Sports Illustrated. He gave her an unrepentant grin before resuming his reading. Huffing in irritation, Bella turned back to her laptop where the Skype window showed Rose with an impatient expression on her face.

"What did he tell you?" Bella asked warily.

"That Prince Charming nearly got a concussion saving Cinderbella from the big bad wolf," Rose replied. Bella gave a mental sigh of relief. _Okay, that's not too bad...at least he didn't tell her - _"And that Prince Charming turned out to be a frog," Rose finished._ Shit._

Bella turned and shot another glare at Emmett then turned back to Rose. "First of all, you're mixing up your fairy tales," she said. Rose waved her hand dismissively, and Bella gritted her teeth to keep her temper in check. "And secondly, Edward is _not_ a frog."

"Well that's a completely different tune than you've been singing for the past two years. So what happened?"

"Sounds like Kronk gave you the rundown already," Bella stalled, hoping to avoid rehashing everything. But Rose wouldn't be deterred.

"He told me the basics. But, I mean, are you ok? Not just after Jake, but after seeing Edward? It's so crazy that he just showed up at the same party as you. Did you even know he was back?" Rose asked, her concern evident on her face.

Bella sighed. "Yeah, I'm ok. I felt like I was on a damn rollercoaster, but I'm ok. Jake was a dick, but that's nothing new. And seeing Edward was a trip. Like, I thought I was hallucinating, I couldn't believe it was him."

"So what about after he saved you from Jake? Kronk said you guys were maybe talking things out?"

"You're worse than Perez Hilton," Bella grumbled at Emmett.

He shrugged, replying, "What can I say? Your life is more interesting than mine."

Bella sighed and turned back to Rose. "Yeah, we talked. So, um...turns out I kinda totally overreacted in high school..."

"I kinda figured. What finally convinced you?"

As Bella explained the revelations from the previous night, Rose listened with wide eyes. She winced in sympathy when Bella revealed that the blonde was actually Edward's cousin, and her eyebrows shot towards her hairline when Bella told her his reasoning for never dating in high school.

"What about after you guys left the party?" Emmett piped in after Bella had finished her tale.

Bella flushed as memories of Edward's lips on hers flitted through her mind. She cleared her throat, hoping to present an air of nonchalance. "Not much. He walked me back and we talked a little more. He actually lives in Cedar, which is all kinds of small world crazy. We talked about maybe grabbing lunch together next week or something."

Rose eyed her suspiciously through the web cam. Bella tried to keep her face impassive, but her acting skills must have been lacking, because Rose gasped and sat back in her chair, pointing an accusing finger at Bella. "You kissed him!"

"What?" Bella spluttered. "What are you talking about?"

"You totally did! You wouldn't be all blushy and moony eyed if all you'd gotten out of the night was tentative lunch plans."

"Ugh, I should hate you for being able to read me that well. It's kinda freaky," Bella groused, pouting out her lower lip petulantly.

Rose waved her hand dismissively again. "Shut up, you love me and you know it. Did you really kiss him?"

Bella's mouth quirked up in a small smile and she nodded slowly.

"Aaaand...?" Rose prompted.

"It was pretty much the most amazing kiss ever," Bella sighed, losing herself in the memory. She was jolted from her reverie by Emmett pretending to gag and Rose giggling. "Oh, shut up, both of you," she grumbled.

"You know we're just kidding, Ducky," Emmett soothed, reaching over and ruffling her hair. She ducked out from under his hand and glowered at him. "Aw, don't be that way," he pouted. "He seemed decent enough. And he took a punch for you, so that automatically earns him points."

"Thanks, Kronk," Bella said, smiling to show she didn't harbor any hard feelings. "It's just...I've been in love with him for as long as I can remember. And we mesh so effortlessly. Or at least, we used to. I mean, what if he's changed since we stopped talking? Because I've changed, right? So what if we don't mesh anymore?"

"Whoa, slow down, Ducky," Rose called, raising her hands for emphasis. Bella took a deep breath and blew the air out of her nose slowly.

Once she was sure Bella was ready to listen, Rose continued, "Ok, one thing at a time. First of all, of course he's changed in the last two years. And you have, too. You're stronger, more confident, more kick-ass. Plus you have amazing new friends." Bella and Emmett both laughed at that.

"Secondly, you might not mesh the same way you used to." When she saw the way Bella paled, she rushed on. "Which is totally ok! Maybe you'll mesh a new way, a better way."

Bella gave a half-hearted smile, not entirely convinced. "But if we don't..." she protested weakly.

"You were just going all gooey about 'the most amazing kiss ever', obviously there was some meshing going on," Emmett argued, wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

"Oh, shut up," Bella giggled, picking up her pillow and swinging it at him. He dodged it easily and reached over to pinch at her waist. She shrieked and swung the pillow at him again, this time hitting him across the back of the head.

"Hey, break it up!" Rose called. "No fair beating up on Kronk when I can't join in!"

"Hey!" Emmett cried as Bella threw her head back and laughed.

When they'd finally settled down, Bella crossed her arms on her desk and settled her chin on her forearms. "So, what do I do?" she beseeched Rose and Emmett.

"Do? What do you want to do?" Emmett asked.

Bella considered for a moment, before answering, "Now that we both have admitted to having feelings for each other, I guess I want to see if we can maybe make that work. I never really stopped loving him..."

"Then that's what you do," Rose announced as Emmett nodded his agreement.

"But what if it doesn't work?"

"Then it doesn't work. But c'mon, you've been pining over him for the last, what, decade? Is trying and failing worse than not trying at all?" Rose argued.

"No," Bella admitted. "It's just scarier."

"No pain, no gain!" Emmett exclaimed, and Bella smiled.

Rose laughed. "Yeah, what he said."

"Ok fine, but you guys are going to have to pick up the pieces if I get broken," Bella laughed lightly, but Rose and Emmett both knew she was serious behind her joking demeanor.

"Always," they promised in unison.

o-o-o-o-o-o

Edward was pacing in the kitchen when Ben finally stumbled out of his room the next morning.

"Good morning, Sleeping Beauty," Edward smirked, eying Ben's Superman pajama pants paired with bunny slippers.

Ben grunted and buried his head in the refrigerator, emerging with a can of Mountain Dew and a carton of leftover Chinese food. Edward wrinkled his nose in distaste as Ben took a big mouthful of the cold lo mein followed by a hearty swig of the soda. "How can you eat that shit cold?" Ben just shrugged and took another bite.

"So how'd it go with Calendar Girl?" Ben asked around a mouthful of food.

"Bella," Edward corrected automatically, frowning. He hadn't mentioned having seen the calendar pictures while he was talking to Bella last night, and Ben's reminder just served to make him feel guilty.

"Sorry, _Bella_. She wasn't there when I dropped Angie off last night, and since you were the one walking her home..." Ben trailed off suggestively, wiggling his eyebrows at Edward. Then his eyes widened and he dropped his voice to a stage whisper. "Dude! Is she here? What are you doing out here? Get back in there with her!"

"What is wrong with you?" Edward growled. "She's not here. We just walked around and talked last night, then I dropped her off at the dorm and came back here. Alone. God, how do you manage to keep a girlfriend?"

"I'm irresistible," Ben scoffed as he plucked a stray noodle from his shirt, popping it into his mouth.

Edward shuddered, before taunting, "Or Angie's blind."

Ben stuck up his middle finger at Edward, grinning good-naturedly. "Ok, ok, whatever. So you just walked around and talked?"

"Yeah...apparently she liked me in high school, too, and we were both just too chicken to tell each other how we felt. So we hashed some things out and I think we're good now."

"Good how? Like, 'it was nice to see you again and now I've got some closure' good, or 'let's play video games and I'll let you play with my joystick' good?"

"Were you raised by wolves?" Edward asked incredulously. Ben just grinned, waiting patiently for an answer. Finally Edward sighed, his lips twisting into a wry smile. "How about, 'let's make out in the middle of the park' good?"

"Nice!" Ben crowed, giving Edward a fist bump.

Edward ran a hand through his hair but couldn't contain his grin. "Yeah, it was pretty much the best way the night could have ended."

"You guys will have to come out with Angie and me sometime, then. I'm sure Angie would love that," Ben offered. Edward gave a non-committal shrug.

"I'd like to actually ask her out on a proper date first," he hedged.

"You made out with her in public but didn't ask her out on a date?" Ben asked, his face reflecting his disbelief. Edward winced and nodded. Ben groaned, "You're killing me, Smalls. Why wouldn't you ask her out?"

"I'm going to!" Edward argued defensively. "I had a lot to process last night and it wasn't at the forefront of my mind. Now I'm just trying to come up with what I should ask her to do."

"Oh, come off it. You don't need to go all Nicholas Sparks for a first date. She already knows you, and obviously likes you enough to mack on you in public, so don't over think it. Dinner. Movie. Y'know, basics."

Edward was unconvinced. "Are you sure? I don't want to be telling our grandkids the story of our first date and it's just 'We went to dinner'," he fretted.

"Whoa," Ben murmured, blowing out a low whistle. "How 'bout you stop worrying about impressing grandkids you don't have yet and just make something happen. You've already had problems with her because you were too afraid to make a move. So, y'know...shit or get off the pot."

Edward pinched the bridge of his nose and huffed out a breath. "You're right, you're right. It's just...she's just...everything. She deserves the best, and I want to be the one to give it to her."

"That's fine, but don't spend so long trying to come up with perfection that you miss your chance completely."

"Ben, does Angie know you moonlight as Dr. Phil?" Edward asked, grinning.

"Go ask your girl on a date," he growled, rolling his eyes and heading back to his room.

"Thanks, Ben!" Edward called to his retreating back, earning a wave before Ben shut the door.

He pulled his cell phone out of his pocket and pulled up Bella's number, staring at the screen as he worked up the courage to call her. He nearly dropped the phone when it began buzzing in his hand. The screen showed Alice's smiling face, and he sighed, knowing that now he'd have to rehash the night with her before he could call Bella.

"Hello, Alice," he drawled once he'd accepted the call.

"Edward!" she shrieked in his ear. "How was the party? Did you see Bella? Did you talk to her? What happened?"

Edward laughed at her exuberance, finally breaking in when she paused for breath. "You know, in polite conversations you're supposed to pause after asking a question so as to allow an answer to be provided," he teased gently.

Alice just giggled. "Pfft, that's no fun. So?"

"The party was lame, you know frat parties aren't my scene," Edward started, before Alice interrupted.

"So you didn't see Bella?" she cut in, sounding disappointed.

Edward huffed. "You sound awfully disappointed about that. I thought you didn't like her?"

"Well I don't like what she did to you," Alice agreed. "But you were so excited at the idea of seeing her again, and I just want you to be happy."

"Awwww, that's so sweeeet," Edward teased.

It was Alice's turn to huff. "Shut up. So you didn't see Bella at the party?"

"No, I saw her," Edward corrected.

"And? Don't tell me you were too scared to talk to her! I will come down there and personally kick your ass if you just stood in a corner and watched her like some creeper."

"Christ, Alice! Do you have that little faith in me?" Edward asked, feeling a little hurt at her assumption.

"Of course not," Alice admonished gently. "But I know you. You get all caught up in your head trying to come up with the perfect thing to say and by the time you come up with it, you've lost your chance to say anything at all."

Edward opened his mouth to argue, then closed it again. She was right. That was exactly the same point Ben had made earlier. "Ugh, fine, I do that," Edward admitted. "Usually. But not last night."

"Oh?"

Edward explained the whole night, from trying to help the girl Jake was harassing, to discovering that girl was Bella, to their mutual revelations and eventual kisses.

"Wow," Alice breathed once he'd finished relaying the tale. "So everything worked out, just like I said it would."

Edward laughed, relieved that she wasn't making a huge deal out of everything. "Yeah, yeah, all hail the great and powerful Oz," he deadpanned.

"You said her friend knows Jasper?"

"Yeah, I guess they went to the same high school in Texas," Edward confirmed.

"That's so crazy...what are the odds?"

"Right?" Edward agreed. "So yeah, I think we're just going to let the past be the past and try to see where this goes. I'm like...flying right now." He knew Alice would be able to hear his smile in his voice.

"I'm so glad you worked things out," Alice murmured softly. "I remember that first week you were up here, you were so sad, missing the girl who wasn't your girl. And now..."

"Yeah, now...so do you have any ideas where I should take her for our first date? I was actually just about to call her and officially ask her out when you called."

"Oh, I don't know," Alice hedged. "There are the basics - dinner, movie, that kind of thing."

Edward wrinkled his nose. "That's what Ben suggested, but I'm not convinced. She's so important to me, I want to do something more. Something special."

"I don't really know the area," Alice reminded him. "Google is your friend."

"Good point. Well, I'll let you know how it all goes, ok?"

"You'd better! Talk to you soon?"

"Of course. And Alice?"

"Yeah?"

"Thanks for having my back," Edward murmured quietly.

"Always," she promised.

After he'd hung up with Alice, he put her suggestion to use and searched online for a good first date with Bella. When he found the /udub thread on Reddit, a satisfied grin spread across his face. "Perfect," he breathed, dialing Bella's number.

"Hello?" she answered, slightly breathless.

"Hey, R2. What are you doing Friday?"

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: I did actually Google date ideas in Seattle, and I did find the /udub thread on Reddit, which is where I got the date idea. So what do you think Edward has up his sleeve? We'll find out Saturday :)**


	16. Chapter 16

A little nonsense now and then, is cherished by the wisest men.

~ Roald Dahl, _Charlie and the Great Glass Elevator_

o-o-o-o-o-o

"Can I open my eyes yet?" Bella asked, her excitement evident in her voice. Edward grinned at her as she bounced impatiently in the passenger seat. He'd had her close her eyes as they approached downtown Seattle, wanting to build anticipation and surprise her with their destination.

"Alright, alright, go ahead," he acquiesced.

She opened her eyes eagerly, and looked around. Her brow furrowed in confusion. "Well, shoot, I can't figure out where we're going. Too many options," she groused.

Edward laughed, shrugging, "Well, then I guess you'll just have to wait until we get there."

"I hate waiting," Bella huffed, crossing her arms over her chest, but smiling. She'd been smiling a lot since Edward had called to ask her out for Friday. It just so happened she only had a morning biology lab on Fridays, and then her day was open. When she'd told Edward this, he'd decided to skip his physics lecture on Friday afternoon so they could have even more time together. He'd been smiling a lot since she'd agreed to go out with him, too.

Bella wasn't any closer to figuring out their destination as Edward parked and helped her out of the car. Given their location downtown, there were several options.

"Space Needle?" she asked, going for the most obvious attraction.

"Nope," Edward grinned, anticipating her reaction when she figured out their true destination.

"Chihuly?" She'd always loved the colorful glass sculptures, and her hope rang through her voice.

"Not today, but soon," Edward promised. Pleasure shot through Bella at the idea that there would be a 'soon' with Edward.

Having reached their destination, Edward swept his arm in a grand gesture and held his breath. For all his bravado, he was beginning to feel nervous that Bella would find his date location juvenile. But at Bella's delighted intake of breath, he knew he'd made the right choice.

"Oh, 3PO, really?" she gasped, a wide smile spreading across her face. At his nod, she squealed and threw her arms around his neck in an exuberant hug. "I love the Pacific Science Center!"

Edward laughed at her enthusiasm, and wrapped his arms around her waist, enjoying the feel of her pressed against him. "Well if this is the reaction I get, we're going to come here every week," he teased.

Bella blushed, and tried to pull away, but Edward tightened his arms around her. "I was worried," Edward admitted. "I thought this might be too...childish...for a proper first date."

"Nope," Bella declared. "It's perfect. Remember when we came here with Mr. Banner's biology class freshman year?"

Edward grinned at the memory. "Of course I do. Mike Newton squealed like a little girl when that butterfly landed on him, and Tyler was giving him so much crap for it. Then when a butterfly landed on Tyler's nose, he screamed even louder and started running around like his ass was on fire." By the end of the reminiscing, they were both gasping for breath from laughing so hard.

As they settled down and caught their breath, Bella realized she was still wrapped up in Edward's arms. He realized the same thing and squeezed her waist a little tighter.

"Thank you," he murmured.

"For what?" Bella asked with a gentle smile on her face.

"For coming with me today."

She beamed at him. "Thank you for asking me, especially after I was such an idiot in high school."

"I told you, we're calling it even," Edward admonished, playfully pinching her waist.

She wiggled away from his fingers then looked up at him from under her lashes. "I thought we were making up for lost time."

"That too," Edward agreed, lowering his head to press his lips against Bella's gently. She hummed happily at the contact, but Edward pulled away from her before the kiss could escalate. He so badly wanted to escalate things, but not in front of the science museum.

"C'mon," he murmured, catching her hand in his as he extricated himself from her grasp. Bella smiled shyly as she laced her fingers with his, giving his hand a gentle squeeze. It amazed her that the same electric current she'd felt at Edward's touch all through her adolescence was not only still present but seemed almost deeper, more profound.

They spent the afternoon acting like children as they explored the museum, ooh-ing and aah-ing as they played with the interactive exhibits, chatting easily about whatever sprang to mind. Edward was fascinated by the remote controlled robots, while Bella gravitated to the light and optics exhibits.

They giggled at the age progression images, and as they danced on the musical stairs, random notes filling the air, Bella teased Edward, "I thought you were supposed to be a piano player. I'm going to have to tell your mother you've been slacking on your practice."

"I'll show you slacking," he growled, and Bella shrieked as he chased her up the rest of the stairs, a cacophony of discordant notes ringing out around them.

As they wandered through the butterfly house, Edward couldn't resist sneaking a kiss, and Bella eagerly accepted his affection. They grabbed a light snack in the cafe before Edward revealed that he'd gotten them tickets to the Laser Dome.

Bella clapped her hands excitedly, having always loved the light shows. As they settled into their seats, Edward slid his arm around Bella's shoulder, and she snuggled happily against him. It was a position they'd been in many times growing up, but Edward marveled at how right Bella felt fitted against his chest, as if she should never be anywhere else except tucked next to his heart.

When Bella felt him press a kiss to her hair, she leaned up and captured his lips with her own, reveling in the taste and texture of him against her tongue. They broke apart when the lights dimmed, signaling the show was about to begin, and Edward leaned to rest his cheek against Bella's head. They stayed snuggled together for the duration of the show, enjoying the lights, the music, and the feeling of being once again in each other's company.

When the screen went dark and the music faded to silence, both stood up and stretched. Edward eyed the way Bella's breasts pressed against her t-shirt as she arched her back, feeling his body react immediately. He cleared his throat guiltily, forcing his eyes away from the tempting vision she presented.

While he was surreptitiously ogling Bella, she was slyly ogling him right back. Her mouth went dry as Edward stretched his arms over his head, causing his shirt to ride up and expose the downy hair swirling around his belly button, and leading lower into his jeans. Her breath hitched, and she cast her eyes away, hoping the dim lights in the theater would help hide the blush she could feel spreading across her cheeks.

"Well, what did you think?" Edward asked, hoping his voice didn't sound too strained from the lust shooting through him.

"Amazing," Bella breathed, though the way she was looking at him, Edward thought perhaps she wasn't talking about just the laser show.

He smiled and reached for her hand, lacing their fingers together. "Want to grab some dinner?" he asked, hoping she'd say yes so that he wouldn't have to part from her just yet.

"Definitely," she agreed, just as reluctant for the night to end as Edward.

They left the museum and strolled through the warm evening air, wide grins on their faces as they discussed their favorite exhibits from the afternoon, and memories of previous trips from their childhood. They stopped to pick up a pizza, lingering in the booth long after their food and drinks were gone. As the staff began preparing to close for the night, they finally gave in to the inevitable and headed back to campus.

"I had the best time today, Edward," Bella murmured softly, turning to face him as they paused near her dorm entrance.

"Me, too," he agreed. He'd been concerned that there may be residual awkwardness between them after the misunderstandings and their long separation, but the whole day had proven just how well they still complemented each other. "Guess I set the bar pretty high for date two, huh?"

"So there'll be a date two?" Bella asked shyly.

Edward answered her by cupping her face in his hands and pressing a gentle kiss to her lips. She melted against him, winding her arms around his waist. Pulling away just slightly, his lips continued to graze hers as he whispered, "Date two, and three, and four, and five -"

Grinning widely, Bella interrupted him by pressing her lips firmly against his again. After a few moments, she pulled away, smiling up at him with sparkling eyes. "I can't wait."

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: Mmm fluffy. My first date with my husband was lunch at Noodles &amp; Co (fast food noodles if you've never been), wandering around the Dollar Store laughing at the weird stuff they had, and then a walk around the neighborhoods by our school. So...not exactly the stuff of romance novels, but it worked ok for us, since we've been together 10 years now. **

**How about you? What was your most memorable first date?**


	17. Chapter 17

There's a difference between keeping an open mind and believing something because you want it to be true.

~ Sub-Commander T'Pol, Star Trek Enterprise

o-o-o-o-o-o

Edward couldn't remember the last time he had been this happy. In the last few weeks, he and Bella had gone out on several more official dates, but even better in Edward's mind was that they were once again a daily presence in each other's lives.

On the days they both had early classes, they'd head to a coffee shop to grab caffeine and muffins before parting ways. On the days they had matching breaks between classes, they'd meet in one of the common areas and work on homework together. And on the days their schedules just didn't mesh, they texted incessantly.

The one small hitch had been the weekend Bella's friend Rosalie came to campus to visit; Bella had insisted Edward join them for lunch so she could introduce them. He'd stood awkwardly to the side while Bella greeted and hugged the pretty blonde girl, then Bella turned with sparkling eyes, speaking to Rose though her gaze was on Edward. "Rose, this is -"

"Ah, you must be Teller," she interrupted, giving Edward a hard smile.

"I - what?" he asked, confused. He glanced at Bella, but she looked just as perplexed by Rose's statement as Edward.

"You know, that little guy from Penn and Teller. The one who never talks. Since apparently you're incapable of just _talking_ to Bella and telling her what's going on in your mind rather than making her think she didn't stand a chance with you."

Edward bristled at her tone. "I didn't want to ruin a good thing by making it awkward if she didn't like me back. You know that old saying, 'If it ain't broke, don't fix it'?" he defended.

Rose scoffed and pointed an accusing finger at him. "Well obviously it was broken, and you not being man enough to tell her how you felt broke it more. She was alone, and shattered, and you didn't even care!"

"I didn't know!"

"You didn't _try_ to know! Not only did she have to deal with your complete communication breakdown, she had those fucking vultures at school circling her constantly, picking at her while she was down, just waiting for her to give up so they could go in for the kill."

"Rosalie!" Bella hissed, tugging at her friend's arm. She'd been completely shocked at how quickly their confrontation had escalated, and it took a moment for her to react; people were starting to cast worried glances in their direction and she knew she needed to diffuse the situation quickly.

"You know it's true, Ducky," Rose insisted, though her tone was gentler.

"Yeah, but it's not even Edward's fault," Bella chastised. "I had just as much of a chance to speak up as he did, and I didn't either, so it's just as much my fault. Plus, I ignored him when he _did_ try to talk to me."

Rose gave Bella a teasing grin, her demeanor softening further, "And I've let you know what I think about that, haven't I?"

Bella rolled her eyes, and her lips twisted into a wry smile. "Only, like, _every day _for the last two years," she drawled. "Now quit harassing my boyfriend. I've forgiven him, and he's forgiven me, and we're trying to let the past be in the past and not dwell on it."

"Oh, fine, be that way," Rose huffed playfully, and Edward breathed a sigh of relief. He didn't harbor any misapprehensions that he and Rose would be BFFs any time soon, but at least she wasn't yelling at him anymore.

He snagged Bella's elbow as they walked towards the deli to grab lunch. "Boyfriend, huh?" he murmured in her ear. Bella flushed in embarrassment; they hadn't had the whole "boyfriend/girlfriend" talk, yet, so she'd taken creative license in her chastisement of Rose. Now she worried if she'd overstepped.

"Uh, yeah...sorry, I know we haven't really -" she stammered, but Edward cut her off by gently pressing his lips to hers.

"Don't apologize. I'm sorry I didn't ask you sooner," he gave her a rueful grin as he paused. "I'm still not very good at saying what I want when it comes to you. But nothing would make me happier than if you would be my girlfriend."

Bella gave him a glowing smile and leaned up to seal the deal with a kiss. "Of course," she murmured.

"Now come on, girlfriend, I have a feeling I'm going to need you to protect me from Rose during lunch."

She laughed, and they'd headed hand-in-hand to catch up with Rose.

o-o-o-o-o-o

Edward was crouched over, packing up his notebook at the end of a physics lecture, already looking ahead to meeting Bella in a few minutes, when a pair of boots stepped into his peripheral vision. He glanced over and trailed his eyes up to see Leah standing next to him with a seductive grin on her face. He turned away to hide his grimace, then stood up, sighing, "Hello, Leah."

"Hi, Edward! What are you doing after this? I was thinking we could start looking at the next section, maybe discuss a game plan over lunch?"

He sighed again. Leah had wormed her way into his study group, but was always trying to get him to work with her one-on-one. Her persistence was getting on his nerves, especially since he'd tried every way he could to politely deter her.

"Actually, I was going to meet Bella to study. She has a class at one o'clock, and this is the only time our schedules mesh today," he explained, slinging his backpack over his shoulder and moving around Leah to head out of the lecture hall.

She trailed behind him up the stairs then fell into step next to him. "Oh, well I can just tag along. I don't have another class until after two o'clock, so we can work on it after she has to head out."

"Um," Edward spluttered, shocked by her obtuseness. "Actually, I'd like to just spend the time just me and her."

Leah pouted. "Fine, I can meet you after she has to go to class."

Edward stopped outside of the building where he was meeting Bella. "I don't -" he began to protest, but Leah cut him off.

"Meet you here at one o'clock!" she chirped, sauntering off with an exaggerated sway to her hips. Edward growled in frustration.

He was still glowering when he found Bella sitting at a table with her books spread out around her, tapping away furiously on her calculator. When he dropped heavily into the chair next to her, she put down her pencil and moaned, "I hate, hate, _hate _Taylor series. When will I ever need to use a Taylor series besides this stupid calculus class?"

When he didn't respond right away, she glanced up at him and was startled by the frustrated expression on his face. "What's wrong?" she asked, concern lacing her voice. "Did you get a bad grade on that friction lab?"

"No, I did fine, my group got one of the highest scores in the class," he sighed, scrubbing his hands over his face then dumping his study materials onto the table.

"Well _something_ is wrong," Bella insisted, reaching over to smooth the furrow between his eyebrows with her thumb.

Edward sighed and tried to force himself to relax. He didn't want his frustration with Leah to taint his limited time with Bella. He leaned over and pressed a quick kiss to her lips. "Hi," he murmured as he pulled back.

She rewarded him with a glowing smile. "Hi. So you wanna tell me what put that scowl on your face?"

"Ugh, it's just Leah," he complained. At the mention of Leah's name, Bella frowned. She knew Leah had a crush on Edward, and she knew how relentless she was despite Edward never giving her any encouragement. "She just doesn't take no for an answer. She wants to get started on the next section, and she was trying to come here with me now."

"Well, something you said must have worked since she's not here," Bella soothed.

Edward snorted. "Not really. I told her I wanted the time with you before your one o'clock class, so she said she'd meet me here then."

Bella's chest tightened with anger and possessiveness. "Well you don't have to still be here at one o'clock, do you?" she pointed out.

"I know, but it seems rude to just ditch her," he hedged, running his fingers through his hair.

Bella huffed and muttered, "It's rude to invite yourself to study dates."

Feeling guilty for souring the mood, Edward rubbed his thumb over Bella's knuckles soothingly, trying to distract her. "Want some help with those Taylor series?" he offered.

"No, I'm just going to skip them for now and work on them tomorrow I think. What are you working on?" Bella asked, allowing Edward to change the topic. She didn't want to dwell on Leah's machinations anymore, anyway.

They spent the rest of their time chatting more than studying, sneaking kisses and subtle caresses when the mood struck. And the mood struck often. Bella was just packing up her bag when Leah sauntered up to their table.

"Hello, Becka," she sneered.

Bella rolled her eyes at Leah's immature dig. However, after seeing how frustrated Edward had been earlier, she couldn't resist poking back. "Hi, Lisa, how are you?" Leah shot a venomous look at Bella before plastering a wide grin on her face and turning towards Edward.

"So, Edward, are you excited to learn about stimulated emissions?" she purred, and Bella rolled her eyes again. Could she be any more obvious?

Ignoring Leah, Edward grabbed Bella's hand and pulled her close, murmuring, "Want to do a movie at my place tonight?"

Bella grinned and nodded. "Sure, we can do our own study on stimulated emissions," she cooed teasingly. Edward swallowed thickly, glad the table hid his reaction to Bella's words. He'd hate for Leah to think she was the one who'd affected him; she'd be even more tenacious.

He narrowed his eyes at her and growled, "Minx," as she giggled. He pulled her down for a quick kiss, but when he moved to pull away, Bella pressed closer, slipping her tongue out to trace the seam of Edward's lips then dip in to tangle with his. She knew it was immature, but she wanted to rub her relationship with Edward in Leah's face just a little.

When she pulled away, Edward's slightly glazed eyes met hers and she giggled again. She cast a smug smile at Leah before slipping the strap of her messenger bag over her shoulder and turning away. "See you tonight, 3PO," she called over her shoulder, shooting him one last smoldering look. His Adam's Apple bobbed convulsively as he lifted a hand in acknowledgment.

Leah tried to recapture his attention after Bella's departure, but Edward was too caught up in thoughts of Bella's whispered words. He feigned interest in her prattling for as long as he could before excusing himself, leaving a very aggravated Leah sulking at the table.

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: I will be out of town for work tomorrow, so that means you get an early update! You also get a super long A/N **

**That Leah just can't take a gentle hint, can she? I also hated Taylor series when I was in college - they're the devil. But in case you were curious, you can use them to approximate sine and cosine, so they are actually useful. Even though they're the devil. **

**I loved all of your stories about memorable dates! /strongstrongAnd I don't think I've said this lately, but honestly, thank you so much for the love you're showing my little story. It's completely amazing, and it makes me smile every time I see a new reader or review. **

**Oh, and if you're the kind who appreciates warnings about that type of thing, this story will start earning its M-rating for more...citrusy reasons...starting next chapter ;) so if you're a young'un, avert your eyes, please**


	18. Chapter 18

Science, my lad, is made up of mistakes, but they are mistakes which it is useful to make, because they lead little by little to the truth.

~ Jules Verne, _A Journey to the Center of the Earth_

o-o-o-o-o-o

"So...how was your _study date_?" Bella teased when Edward let her into his apartment that evening.

Edward rolled his eyes as he settled next to her on the couch, wrapping his arm around her shoulder. "I just don't get it. Who's that excited to study physics?" he asked incredulously.

"Oh, 3PO, really? You're not _that_ blind are you?" Edward just blinked at her, and Bella sighed, realizing he was honestly unaware of Leah's ulterior motives. "She has a crush on you," Bella said slowly, as if speaking to a toddler. "She couldn't care less about physics. She's just using the most convenient excuse to be close to you."

"What? No," Edward protested. He thought back on his interactions with Leah, and Bella could see the moment his brain put all the pieces together and the truth dawned on him. "Really?"

Bella giggled and nodded. "I can't believe you're only just figuring it out now."

"I don't have a whole lot of experience with girls having crushes on me," he defended.

"I had a crush on you," Bella reminded him.

He grinned ruefully. "Yeah, and I had no idea about that one, either, did I?"

Bella laughed, then snuggled closer to him, placing her hand in the center of his chest. "I guess not. But it worked out ok, didn't it?"

"More than ok," Edward corrected, leaning down to brush his lips against hers gently. She responded eagerly, and Edward groaned into her mouth as their tongues met and caressed. He buried his hand in her hair, loving the way the silky strands sifted through his fingers.

In the weeks they'd been dating, there had been plenty of kissing but not much more than that. They hadn't really discussed taking things further, and Bella realized they both seemed to be waiting for the other to make the first move. _Well, that didn't work out so well for you in high school, Bella,_ she chastised herself._ Time to take matters into your own hands. Literally._

Tentatively, Bella trailed her hand down from Edward's chest, over his stomach, settling it at his waist, just above the waistband of his jeans. Leah's crass bastardization of physics concepts had only served to pique her interest in "friction" and "stimulated emissions".

Edward's breath hitched as Bella slid her fingers under the hem of his shirt, grazing over the hot skin and silky hair on his stomach. He started to pull his mouth away from hers to say something, but his mind went blank when Bella pressed her palm gently against his erection straining against the fly of his jeans.

When he didn't shy away from her touch, Bella flicked open the button on his jeans and slid the zipper down slowly. Edward's heart was hammering against his ribcage. He'd fantasized about Bella's hands on him so many times since he hit puberty, it hardly seemed possible that it was about to become reality.

Bella paused with her hand hovering open the opening of Edward's pants. "Is this ok?" she whispered against his lips.

"God, yes," he groaned, pressing his lips against hers feverishly for a moment before resting his forehead against hers.

Bella gave him a small smile before turning her attention lower, sliding her hand into his jeans and palming him through his boxers. She tested the weight of him, enjoying the way he felt in her hand and the power she felt knowing she was responsible for this reaction. There was only so much she could do in the constricted space inside his jeans, though...maybe he would let her...well, only one way to find out.

Edward was in heaven; Bella's hands on him felt even better than he ever could have imagined. She was barely touching him and he already felt like he was on a hair-trigger. When the pressure of Bella's hand disappeared, Edward glanced at her, concerned that he'd done something wrong or offended her somehow. Then he felt her hands tugging at the waistband of his jeans and he eagerly lifted his hips.

Together, they worked his jeans down over his knees so they fell in a puddle at his ankles. Bella eyed the bulge tenting the front of Edward's plaid boxers, suddenly feeling much less sure of herself.

Noticing her hesitation, Edward massaged the back of her neck gently. "Hey, we can stop if you're not comfortable," he reassured her, though his cock protested at the mention of stopping.

"I don't...it's just, I've never...you have to tell me if I do it wrong, ok?" Bella stammered shyly, settling her hand on Edward's hip.

He barked out a relieved laugh, then pressed a lingering kiss to her forehead. His lips grazed her skin as he whispered, "Believe me, nothing that involves your hands on me is going to be wrong."

Placated, Bella tilted her head up and nipped gently at Edward's lower lip before pressing her lips against his. He deepened the kiss, curling his tongue around hers as she wrapped her hand around him through the fabric of his boxers.

Bella moved her hand tentatively at first, keeping her grip loose as she stroked up and down his shaft, but as she became more confident, her movements became more sure. Edward's hips pressed reflexively into her grasp, meeting her on the down strokes.

Edward's breathing grew ragged as Bella stroked him, completely lost to the sensation. When she brushed her thumb over the wet patch forming at the tip, a shudder ran down his spine and he twitched in her hand.

"God, Bella," he panted, pulling her closer against him and burying his face in the crook of her neck. Bella grinned to herself, inordinately pleased with the effect she was having on him.

What she hadn't expected was the effect Edward's passion would have on her; she felt a pull low in her abdomen every time his breath hitched or he made a sound of pleasure in the back of his throat. Of course, she was also imagining other scenarios where he might be making those sounds. Scenarios that involved soft beds, tangled sheets, and very little clothing.

Much too soon for his liking, Edward felt his balls tighten as molten heat spread down his spine, signaling his impending release. He tried to hold off, wanting to prolong the experience of Bella's hand on him as long as possible, but when she gripped him just a little tighter and twisted her hand at the top of her stroke, his control shattered.

Bella felt Edward grow impossibly harder beneath her hand before he sucked a long breath in through his nose, letting it out as a slow "Oh, God," as his whole body went rigid. He pressed his hips tightly up against her hand as wetness began to seep through the fabric of his boxers.

She continued to stroke him through his orgasm, until he placed his hand over the back of hers to still her movements against his overly sensitive flesh. He pressed a soft, open mouthed kiss against her shoulder before pulling back, a lazy grin on his face.

"Was that ok?" Bella asked, looking for reassurance even though she knew he'd enjoyed himself.

Edward rolled his eyes playfully, and leaned in to capture her lips. "Nope," he announced when he pulled back. "Not ok." Bella's eyebrows furrowed; was it possible she misunderstood his reaction? Before she could doubt herself too much, he drew her into another kiss, deeper this time.

"Amazing. Perfect. Fan-fucking-tastic," he corrected, punctuating each word with a deep kiss. "So much more than _'ok'_." Bella relaxed against him, feeling silly for being so relieved at hearing how thoroughly he'd enjoyed her ministrations.

Edward toyed with the ends of Bella's hair as she rested her head against his chest, his heart thrumming beneath her ear. Though his boxers were damp and slightly uncomfortable, he couldn't quite find the motivation to move from Bella's side just yet.

As the afterglow from his orgasm faded, and his brain became capable of logical thought once again, he realized he wanted to provide that same experience to Bella. He was just about to ask her if he could return the favor when he heard the sound of keys in the door.

"Shit!" he hissed, leaping out of Bella's embrace and bending to retrieve his pants from the floor. Bella gaped at him with wide eyes, confused by his outburst. "Ben is back," he stage-whispered as he began struggling to get the denim up his legs.

He was just zipping up his fly as Ben walked through the door, staring at his phone. Ben glanced up, then did a double-take when he took in his roommate obviously just getting redressed, and the general dishevelment of both Bella and Edward. "Hey," he drawled. "What are you two up to?"

"Just," Edward began, but his voice cracked. He cleared his throat and tried again. "Just watching a movie." Ben smirked at Edward, raising an eyebrow knowingly.

Edward just glared at Ben; the man had a girlfriend, for fuck's sake. He should be more sympathetic! Edward had spent plenty of nights locked in his bedroom with his headphones on while Ben and Angela "watched a movie"; why couldn't Ben extend the same courtesy to him?

Bella glanced between the two boys, knowing it was obvious to Ben that they hadn't been watching a movie. The evidence was everywhere; Edward's hair stuck up in a million different directions from her fingers, his shirt was askew, and he was just doing up his pants. Based on his appearance, she didn't imagine she looked much better.

The longer the boys maintained their silent stare-down, the more awkward she felt. Finally, she couldn't take the tension any longer. Clearing her throat, she announced, "So, um. I'm just going to go." Edward's eyes flew to hers and he winced.

"No, don't go, Bella. Ben can just go to his room and we can finish the movie," he argued, shooting another glare at Ben. Ben raised his hands in a gesture of surrender and began heading towards his room, but Bella knew the mood had been ruined. She was too embarrassed at almost being caught with her hand in the cookie jar, so to speak. Her fight-or-flight instincts were kicking in, and she was definitely ready to fly.

"Nah, it's getting late, and I've got some economics homework I need to finish up," she insisted, standing up and gathering her belongings.

Edward sighed, silently cursing Ben for his terrible timing. "Alright, I'll walk you back," he conceded.

They didn't head directly to Bella's dorm, opting instead to wander around in the balmy evening, their shoulders brushing and their fingers interlaced. When Edward finally dropped her off at her door, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed a lingering kiss against his mouth.

"I had a lot of fun tonight," she murmured, giving him a shy smile.

Edward laughed softly. "Shouldn't that be my line?" he teased, and a blush tinted Bella's cheeks. "Tonight was amazing. Best night ever." She nuzzled into his chest and he leaned down, dropping gentle kisses on her hair, her temple, down until his lips grazed her ear.

"I'm so glad I got you back, Bella. You're the best thing to ever happen to me," he murmured huskily, placing a gentle kiss at the hollow behind her ear before pulling back. "Talk to you tomorrow," he said before turning and sauntering away as if he hadn't just turned her into a pile of ash with his whispered declaration.

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: C'mon, Ben. Sheesh. Don't worry, Bella won't be left high and dry for long. **

**There was a missing word last chapter, when Bella was telling Rose it was not Edward's fault they stopped talking...I left out the "not", which kinda completely changed that sentence. It's fixed now. See you Wednesday. **


	19. Chapter 19

"Even trained for years as they all had been in precision of language, what words could you use which would give another the experience of sunshine?"

~ Lois Lowry, _The Giver_

o-o-o-o-o-o

"No! No, no, no, no! Not fair, you jerk, I needed that card!" Bella squealed when Edward flipped over the Academy card.

Edward gave his best evil laugh. "I told you you'd never beat me at 7 Wonders! I am the _master _of 7 Wonders."

Bella huffed and crossed her arms over her chest, though a smile twitched at the corner of her lips. Edward didn't notice her reaction though; he was distracted by the way her crossed arms pressed her breasts up, the creamy mounds peeking temptingly over the neckline of her blouse.

"Ahem," she cleared her throat exaggeratedly when she noticed where his attention had fallen. Edward's eyes shot up to meet hers, looking guilty until he saw her smirk. "My eyes are up here," she teased.

"I've made my choice," he declared with an unrepentant grin, dropping his eyes to ogle her chest again.

Bella laughed - which did amazing, jiggly things to her chest, Edward noted - then threw a handful of coin tokens at him. "Perv!"

Edward bent to retrieve the little cardboard discs. "Ooh, free points!" he teased.

"Hey! Give those back, you thief!" Bella cried as she leaned over the table, trying to retrieve the tokens from Edward's grasp.

He lifted his hand high above his head so Bella wouldn't be able to reach. "Nope! You're the one who threw them at me. Possession is nine tenths of the law, you know. These are mine now, and no jury in the world would side with you."

Bella leaned further across the table, reaching towards his hand, but he arched backwards, keeping out of her grasp. "You asked for it," she growled playfully, moments before she pounced. Edward was startled when she tackled him to the couch, but he managed to keep his hold on the coin tokens.

"Ha! You gotta do better than that," he taunted, stretching his arm as far away from Bella as he could as she hovered over him.

She swiped her fingers across his armpits, and when he didn't flinch, further down on his waist. When she still didn't get the reaction she was hoping for, she moaned, "Damn it! You're _still_ not ticklish?"

Edward gave her a bemused grin. "I don't think that's something that develops over time. People don't suddenly become ticklish, do they?"

"A girl can hope," she grumbled, making another grab towards his hand. He moved just in time and grinned triumphantly, then used his free hand to prod at Bella's waist, knowing she had always been ticklish there.

"Ahh! No! No!" she gasped, pushing ineffectively at his wrist. "That's fighting dirty!"

"You started it!" he laughed as he kept up his assault.

Bella narrowed her eyes down at him, then a sly grin spread across her face. "Fine! You wanna fight dirty? I can fight dirty!" she announced.

Edward's grip went slack and the coin tokens tumbled to the floor, forgotten, as Bella reached down to the hem of her blouse and pulled it up and over her head, leaving her straddling him in just her jeans and a lacy purple bra. Bella's abdomen clenched as she watched him swallow thickly. "Oh, Jesus," he muttered, his eyes riveted on her chest. "You win."

"What do I win?" Bella breathed, the heat in Edward's eyes stoking the fire that had settled low in her belly.

His eyes flashed up to meet hers briefly before he leaned up and pulled her flush against him, crashing his lips against hers in a frantic kiss. Bella's hands fisted in his hair, while Edward skimmed his hands over the smooth, bare skin of her back, sending a cascade of sparks down her spine.

Bella could feel his hardness pressed against her where she straddled him, and she gave a tentative roll of her hips, seeking friction. Edward made a low, guttural noise deep in his throat at the contact. Even through their jeans, her heat seared him, and he flexed his hips against hers instinctively.

Edward was just working up the courage to slide his hands around to Bella's front so he could maybe acquaint his hands with the breasts he'd dreamed of since he had hit puberty, when Bella wrenched her lips from his. "When is Ben going to be back?" she panted.

"What?" He was too consumed with lust to make coherent sense of her question, though her asking about his roommate while she was topless was doing a good job of cooling his ardor.

"I don't really want to be topless in your living room when he gets back from class," she explained as she leaned back. Though he enjoyed the view now available to him, Edward felt bereft at the loss of contact between their bodies. He had already decided he could happily spend the rest of his life pressed intimately against Bella.

"Oh, um," he glanced around the apartment, seeking a clock. "I think he has calc until 2:30. We could...um...we could go t-to my b-bedroom." The thought of Bella splayed out on his bed made his blood pulse heavily where their hips were still pressed together.

Nodding, Bella swung her legs to the side and clambered off of Edward's lap, bending to retrieve her discarded top. Edward leaned up on his elbows and scrubbed a hand over his face, trying to calm himself down before he embarrassed himself by doing something stupid, like making a mess in his pants.

"Coming?" Bella asked, cocking an eyebrow at him, and he had to stifle a laugh at her unintended double entendre. He pushed himself up off the cushion, grabbing her hand and leading her into his room.

As he closed and locked the door, Bella's nerves began to get the better of her. She'd been feeling playful and flirty when she'd taken her top off, but now, faced with Edward's bed and the promise of...more...she was feeling much less confident.

She nearly jumped out of her skin when Edward settled his hands on her shoulders. "Hey, what's wrong?" he asked, concern lacing his voice as he shifted her so she was facing him.

Bella shrugged, her eyes looking everywhere but at him. She finally settled on staring at his throat as she answered, "I'm just feeling stupid. I was kinda caught up in the moment out there, and now..."

"Now?" Edward prompted, tucking her hair behind her ear in a familiar caress.

Bella sighed. "Now, I don't know what you expect. I want more but not..._more_, y'know?"

Edward pulled her against him, wrapping her in a gentle hug. "Hey, I don't _expect_ anything. We go at whatever pace we're comfortable with. If one of us wants to take a step back, I would hope we trust each other enough to respect that," he reassured her. "Do you want to just go back out in the living room and watch a movie or something? Or we never officially finished that game of 7 Wonders..."

Bella melted into his embrace, nuzzling against his chest. "Oh, no, I totally won that game. You said so," she giggled.

"Hey, no way! You totally cheated. I didn't realize we were playing strip 7 Wonders, or I would have been prepared for your guerilla tactics!" he protested.

"Nope. You admitted, and I quote, _'You win'_, end quote," Bella contended.

Edward grinned down at her, glad her tension seemed to have dissipated. "Well, then, best two out of three?" he offered.

Bella pulled her lower lip between her teeth for a moment, before looking up at Edward through her lashes. "Well, um...like I said, I'm not opposed to...more. Just not...I don't want to...I'm a virgin!" she finally blurted, then immediately buried her face in her hands, mortified at her lack of filter.

Edward gaped at her for a moment before he cleared his throat. "Oh, uh, that's...that's not what...I didn't mean we should...have s-sex," he stammered, though his body immediately reacted to the thought of sex with Bella. "I've never...either...so...But, I want to. With you. I just...I want it to be...not...not when I'd be worried about Ben coming home in the middle of it."

Bella took a deep breath, letting it out slowly through her nose to calm herself. "So what _did_ you, uh, want to do?"

"I liked what we were doing out there," he said, then figured he probably couldn't get any more embarrassed, so he might as well admit, "And I, uh...I'd really like to...touch you. Like...like you did for me?"

"Oh," Bella squeaked, pressing her thighs together against the flood of arousal his stilted request caused. "O-Ok."

"Yeah?"

Bella could only nod in response. Edward led her to the bed, and they sat next to each other, their posture rigid, neither one sure who should make the first move. Finally Edward let out a rueful laugh. "This is awkward. This shouldn't be awkward. Come here," he requested, pulling Bella against him.

She didn't know why she was feeling so nervous. This was Edward. Hell, she'd touched him a few days ago and he didn't go all stiff and awkward on her. Well, ok...stiff. But not awkward. _Christ, Bella, seriously? Now is not the time to be making immature jokes in your mind_, she berated herself.

Some of her tension had eased once she was back in his embrace, and she relaxed completely when he whispered, "I'll stop any time you want me to, ok? Just let me know if you get uncomfortable, and I'll stop." She nodded her agreement, and Edward leaned them back onto the mattress so he was laying partially on top of her.

He skimmed his lips against hers in a barely-there caress, then again, a little firmer this time. He continued to increase the pressure of his kisses until Bella was panting beneath him, opening her mouth in invitation. He willingly accepted, sliding his tongue against hers gently.

As their tongues tangled, Edward grazed his fingertips down Bella's neck, over her collarbone and shoulder, leaving a trail of goose bumps in their wake. Slowly, giving her a chance to protest, he moved his hand lower, until he brushed the side of her breast through her bra. She sucked in a quick breath, but otherwise didn't protest, and he took that as permission to shift his hand to cup her fully.

He reveled in the sensation of finally having his hands on her for a moment, before he began exploring the tender flesh beneath his palm. He sought her reactions, cataloguing which touches elicited which responses; the gasp when he squeezed gently, the whimper when he traced his fingers along the sensitive underside, the arch of her back when he passed his thumb over her pebbled nipple.

Finally, when Bella didn't think she could take any more of the delicious torture, Edward traced his fingers down her rib cage, over the soft skin of her stomach, tracing around her belly button, before hovering over the fly of her jeans.

"Can I?" he asked softly, and Bella nodded shyly. Her heart pounded against her ribs as Edward manipulated the button and slid the zipper down. She lifted her hips off the bed and helped Edward shimmy the denim down her hips, leaving her in only her bra and matching panties.

She had a flash of gratitude for Emmett for getting her to a point where she didn't feel like she was hideous unclothed, then all thoughts of anything except Edward fled as he angled his mouth against hers again, kissing her deeply as he dipped his fingers below the waistband of her panties.

His erection twitched painfully against the fly of his jeans when he felt the evidence of her arousal coat his fingertips, and he let out a low groan.

"Oh!" Bella whimpered when he slid a finger through her slit, grazing the sensitive bundle of nerves at the top.

Edward paused, concerned, and pulled back, searching her face. "Good 'oh'?" he clarified. Bella nodded vigorously, and he huffed a quiet laugh before repeating the motion. Her hips arched up involuntarily, seeking more friction, and Edward was happy to oblige.

Like he had with her breasts, he tested various touches, learning what brought forth positive reactions. He quickly discovered she preferred slow, gentle strokes, and as he caressed her, the coil in Bella's abdomen tightened until she thought she'd go insane from the want.

"Please, Edward," she gasped, needing...something...more. His name on her lips sounded better than any fantasy Edward had ever had, and he flexed his hips unconsciously, pressing his erection against her hip more firmly. He increased his efforts, fingers slip-sliding through her soaked folds until Bella felt the coil snap. She sucked in a surprised breath as shockwaves of pleasure began in her abdomen, then radiated throughout her body, reverberating until she lay limp and boneless beneath Edward.

For several minutes, the only sound in the room was their combined breathing as Bella recovered from the power of her orgasm, and as Edward worked to calm himself after watching her shatter in his arms.

Finally, Bella rolled so she was cuddled against Edward's side, her head resting on his chest, feeling sated and drowsy. "That was...you have no idea," she breathed.

Edward chuckled. "Well, I think I have _some_ idea," he disagreed playfully.

Bella just chuckled, slapping his chest weakly. He captured her hand in his, lifting it to his mouth and pressing a kiss to her knuckles. "Thank you," she murmured, mimicking his words from the previous night. "Best day ever."

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: 7 Wonders is a real game, and it's really, really fun. The rules are a little complicated the first time you play, but once you get it down, you can play a whole game in about 30 minutes. And for those of you who are concerned, the calendar discussion is coming soonish. That's all you're getting though, since I don't want to spoil my own story ;)**

**See you Saturday!**


	20. Chapter 20

"You ask me what forces me to speak? a strange thing; my conscience."

~ Victor Hugo, _Les Misérables_

o-o-o-o-o-o

"Ok, so...I have something I need to tell you, and I don't want you to freak out..." Angela begged as she sat on the end of Bella's bed. Bella glanced up from her well-worn copy of The Andromeda Strain, immediately nervous.

"That's really not a good way to preface something. I'm already pretty much freaking out and I don't even know what happened. Are you ok? You're not pregnant, are you?"

"No," Angela answered slowly. "I'm not pregnant. I just...something happened that I don't think you're going to be very happy about."

"Well, that's not reassuring at all. Just tell me what's going on," Bella pleaded, a heavy feeling of dread settling low in her stomach.

Angela blew out a nervous breath, then met Bella's gaze, her eyes solemn. "Ok, so I had like, the worst day ever today." Bella's brows knit in confusion - in the many scenarios that flashed through her mind at Angela's warning, this wasn't what she expected to hear.

"Ok...?" Bella prompted, drawing out the word.

"It started out with me spilling my latte on my sweater during my Global Comm class. I ended up having to rush back here to change before Marketing Tech, and just as I got to class the prof was announcing a pop-quiz that counts toward our final. Then, I was on my way to Photomedia and my mom called. Apparently my grandma fell while she was in the shower."

"Oh, no!" Bella interjected. "Is she ok?"

"Yeah, just a little sore. But now my mom and aunt have to think about assisted living since this isn't the first time and they don't want to risk her hurting herself seriously if it happens again. Not a fun conversation for anyone. Anyway, by the time I'm off the phone with my mom, I'm late for class, so I'm rushing to get there. And of course I'm all wrapped up in my own head and not paying attention, so I ran into someone. Dumped both of our bags all over the ground. I was so embarrassed, I just grabbed my stuff, mumbled an apology, and ran off."

Thinking that surely must be the end of the drama, Bella nodded and winced sympathetically, already planning on offering to go pick up sherbet and popcorn so they could do their traditional de-stress movie night. But Angela took a deep breath and kept going.

"So...then...I get to Photomedia and plug in my USB and...it wasn't mine. It just had some random music on it. Which means the person I bumped into has my files."

"Oh, Ang, did you have back-ups on your laptop, or did you lose all of your work?" Bella asked, concern lacing her tone, even while she breathed an internal sigh of relief. That wasn't so bad; she felt bad for her friend's bad luck, but couldn't imagine why Angela would think she'd be so upset over it.

Angela sighed, realizing she would have to be more blunt, since Bella wasn't connecting the dots on her own. "I have backups, but, Bella...someone else has my Photomedia project files now. The project _you_ helped me with."

"What project did I help you with?" Bella asked, confused, wracking her memory. Suddenly, realization dawned and her eyes widened. "No," she breathed, horrified.

Angela looked like she was about to cry. "Yeah...I'm _so_ sorry, Bella. I was so rushed and embarrassed when it happened that I didn't even see who I ran into. I've been trying to figure out how to tell you since it happened...and I just...I'm _so_ sorry."

"Oh, _God_," Bella moaned, burying her face in her hands. "I knew I shouldn't have agreed to those fucking pictures. Now someone has them and they're probably laughing their ass off at the stupid girl who thought she could pretend to be sexy."

"Hey! One, you're like the smartest person I know, so don't call yourself stupid. Two, you _are_ sexy, so there was no pretending," Angela interrupted Bella's pity party. Bella glared at her but Angela continued, undeterred, "Three, your face isn't even in the shots, so they wouldn't be able to tell it was you. And four, this campus is huge, so even if you could see your face, the odds of someone recognizing it's _you_ rather than just some random girl are like...zero."

"You think?" Bella squeaked, tenuous hope starting to smooth the splinters of panic.

Angela nodded decisively, hoping to stem Bella's fears. "Definitely. You're the math girl, think about it. There's like fifty thousand people on campus. You recognize a few hundred faces, maybe, and the ones where you know the name that goes with the face is even fewer, right?"

Bella nodded slowly, though her gut was still churning. "Logically, I know you're right but...I'm still kinda freaking out. Odds don't always mean everything. I mean, what are the odds that Edward would be at the same frat party as me? And what are the odds he'd be rooming with your boyfriend? My life just seems to be filled with these impossible odds scenarios..."

At the mention of Ben, Angela felt even more guilt. But, she quickly decided that now would not be the best time to bring up that Ben had also seen some of the pictures since she had given him a rough-draft of the calendar layout for his opinion. With as anxious as Bella was about a stranger potentially seeing the pictures, Angela knew she wasn't ready to hear someone she knew had already seen them.

Seeing the panic escalate in Bella's eyes again, Angela pressed a soothing hand to her leg. "Let's just think positive, ok? I can't tell you how sorry I am."

Bella sighed. "It wasn't your fault," she offered half-heartedly.

"I still feel awful," Angela insisted. "I really am sorry. I wish there was something I could say that would make it better."

Bella nodded woodenly, too upset to do much else. "I think...I think I need to go for a run, clear my head."

Angela smiled sympathetically. "I can pick up some sherbet and we can do a movie night when you get back?" she offered. Bella was only able to briefly enjoy the irony that she'd been thinking _she_ would be the one providing the comforting ritual to Angela after her bad day.

"We'll see," Bella shrugged as she pushed off the bed to retrieve her running shorts and sports bra. As she settled into the familiar rhythm of her run, her tension slowly eased. She had almost convinced herself there was no point in worrying since things were out of her hands, anyway. Then, she passed by the Cedar Apartments, and her mind immediately flashed to Edward. Almost as quickly, the thought '_What if Edward sees the pictures?' _followed, and just like that, the tenuous calm she'd managed to achieve during her run was obliterated.

_Oh my, God! He's going to think I'm a slut who just goes around having naked pictures taken of herself, or I took them for someone else, and he's never going to want to talk to me again. Oh, fuck. Should I just tell him as a pre-emptive strike? Or just keep my fingers crossed that he'll never find out? What if it were the other way around - which would be worse to me? _

She didn't even have to ponder that question - the answer was immediate in her mind. _It would be way worse if he never told me, then I was blindsided by them. Ugh, do I really have to admit to my boyfriend that there are a bunch of pictures of me in lingerie floating around out there? What if he takes it badly? Oh, God, what if he breaks up with me? _

Bella shook her head, as if the motion would knock the terrifying thought out of her mind. _Stop it. Have you learned nothing from the debacle in high school? Just talk to him rather than assuming you know what he's thinking. _

She sighed and rolled her shoulders, trying to loosen the tension that had resettled into her neck. She knew Edward usually had his physics study group tonight; she didn't want to crash his study time, but she also didn't think she'd be able to wait to talk to him. _Interrupt or wait...interrupt or wait...interrupt or go absolutely insane because all I'll be able to think about until I see him again is the fact that there are naked pictures of me out there somewhere that he doesn't know about. _

_Yeah, let's go to the library. Now. _

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: Poor Bella. How do you think that conversation is going to go over? **

**Happy Memorial Day weekend to those of you in the US, and to the rest of you, happy weekend! **


	21. Chapter 21

"Villains!' I shrieked. 'Dissemble no more! I admit the deed! Tear up the planks! Here, here! It is the beating of his hideous heart!"

~ Edgar Allan Poe, _The Tell-Tale Heart_

o-o-o-o-o-o

"So I think if we solve for x, we get that the wavelength is 440 nanometers, which means the light is blue," Edward concluded as he scribbled his calculations in his notebook.

"Are you sure it's not 540 and green?" Peter asked, squinting at his own notebook.

"Yeah, see here, you have to sub in Planck's constant," Edward said, showing him the calculation again.

Peter considered for a moment, plugged a few more numbers into his calculator, then nodded and crossed out and rewrote his solution.

"Ok, can we call it a night now? I still have that Algorithms lab to finish," Marcus piped in, already packing up his papers.

The rest of the group nodded and murmured their consent, starting to shuffle papers and collect calculators, books, and pencils. Edward tensed when he felt a hand settle on his shoulder and squeeze gently. Only one person in his group had such a blatant disregard for boundaries.

"Want to stop at h-Bar and get some coffee and dessert to celebrate being done with this section?" Leah purred close to his ear. "Or we can head back to my dorm and celebrate another way."

Edward sighed heavily and shrugged out from under her touch. "Leah, seriously. How many times do I have to ask you to stop? I have a girlfriend, and I'm not interested in coffee, or dessert, or anything else with you."

"She wouldn't have to know," Leah insisted, reaching towards him again. "Besides, I see her with another guy all the time, and they always look super cozy. She's obviously not as serious about you as you are about her. You deserve better than a cheater like her."

"Knock it off!" he shouted. The chatter of the group around them died suddenly with Edward's outburst, but he was so focused on Leah that he didn't notice. He leaned towards her, and the menacing look on his face made her flinch backwards. "You know _nothing_ about Bella or my relationship with her, so don't try your games here. That guy you've seen her with? Big guy, maybe 6'2, 6'3, lots of muscles, curly hair and dimples?"

He paused waiting for her confirmation, and Leah nodded meekly, her eyes wide at the sudden change in his demeanor. "Yeah, I figured as much. That's Emmett, one of her best friends. Upstanding guy, we get along great. Nice try, though. Did you really think I'd just take your word for it and cheat on my girlfriend because you said you saw her with another guy? Even if I didn't have Bella, I wouldn't have any interest in someone as underhanded and conniving as you."

Having reached the end of his tirade, it suddenly dawned on him that he was still standing in the study room at the library, surrounded by his physics group. He glanced around, and they were all gaping at him with varying degrees of surprise and amusement. "Sorry about that guys. See you next week?" he declared as nonchalantly as possible, before grabbing his bag and hustling away, leaving an embarrassed Leah to deal with the witnesses of her berating.

Edward pulled out his phone to call Bella, feeling like she needed to know what had transpired during his study session, but just as he was about to dial her number, he heard his name called. He turned toward the sound, and his face broke into a wide grin when he realized it was Bella who had called out to him.

His eyes scanned over her as she approached him, taking in her tiny purple shorts and thin white shirt appreciatively. But when she was close enough to make out the distraught expression on her face, it was like a bucket of cold water on his simmering lust.

"What's wrong?" he cried, closing the distance between them in several long strides, cupping her face with one hand as he skimmed the other over her back and shoulder as if searching for injuries. "Are you ok? What happened?"

Bella sighed deeply and braced herself. "We need to talk," she answered.

Edward's heart sank. Nothing good ever came from that kind of declaration. He dropped his hands from her body and tucked them into his pockets, bracing himself for her next words. _You're having such a good night,_ his inner voice taunted. _First you go off on Leah in front of your physics group, now you're going to get dumped in front of the library. Karma's a bitch._

"So..." Bella started, then blew out a breath. "Ok, this is really embarrassing."

"Just say it," Edward implored, hoping she wouldn't drag out his agony. He closed his eyes as she opened her mouth to continue, as if not seeing her would soften the blow.

"A couple months ago, Angela asked me to help her with a project for one of her classes. She needed to do a photo study of the human body. So, I posed for some pictures for her," Bella explained softly. Edward's eyes popped open in surprise.

"You're not breaking up with me?" he blurted, unable to stop the hopeful words from spilling out of his mouth.

Bella's eyes widened in shock. "No!" she exclaimed. "No, I'm not breaking up with you! Why would you think that?"

"I don't know, just...the look on your face. It was the same look when I told you I had to move. And I'm still having a hard time believing all this is real, so I thought maybe it was time to go back to reality."

"Oh, Edward, no. I'm actually a little afraid _you're_ going to break up with _me_ when you hear what I have to say..." she admitted, dropping her eyes to the ground.

Edward pulled her against him, giddy with relief. "I promise, that's never going to happen. So, what had you been saying? I wasn't paying the best attention." He grinned sheepishly. "Something about Angela and pictures?"

Bella took another deep breath. "Yeah. So, the thing about these pictures. I'm...kindaonlywearingunderwearinthem," she rushed out, burying her face in his chest after the admission had passed her lips.

"That's what you were worried so about?" he asked gently, cupping her shoulders and holding her away from him. She wouldn't meet his eyes, but she nodded, her face burning in embarrassment. "Ok, then I need to tell you something."

At his declaration, Bella slowly slid her gaze to his, her eyes burning with fear, embarrassment, and a hint of hope. Edward gave her a sheepish smile before admitting, "I already knew that."

Bella blinked at him, trying to process his admission. "Knew what?"

"About the pictures," he clarified.

"You...already _knew_ about the pictures?" she asked incredulously, pulling away from him slightly.

"Yeah," he agreed, settling a hand at the nape of his neck in a self-conscious gesture. "Angela had given Ben a copy of the calendar she made for his opinion on the overall product, and I found it. I recognized your infinity necklace."

Bella spun out of Edward's embrace and took a few frantic steps backwards. "_Ben_ has seen them?" she screeched. Edward winced at her hysterical tone.

"Uh - Angela didn't tell you that?" he surmised, realizing he'd just accidentally thrown his friends under the bus.

"No! She did _not_ tell me that!" Bella huffed. "She promised no one but the professor would see them! But _no_, that doesn't mean _no one_, that means her professor, and her boyfriend, and his roommate, and random people on the fucking street!"

"Come on," Edward soothed, closing the distance between them and pulling her tense frame against him, rubbing gentle circles on her neck. "She really only showed Ben. I was never supposed to see them, but I was digging through his backpack to get another book and found it."

"Yeah, well, if she hadn't given them to Ben, you'd never have seen them," Bella insisted, two spots of color high in her cheeks.

"If she hadn't given them to Ben, I might not have found you again," Edward argued. Bella's confused gaze met his and he explained, "I told Ben I knew you from high school, but we'd lost touch. He let me know you were going to the Theta Xi party with Angela, which is why I went. I needed to see you again."

She'd started to relax under his ministrations, but at his words, Bella stiffened again. "You only wanted to see me after you saw those half-naked pictures of me?" she asked, hurt lacing her tone.

"No!" Edward denied immediately. "I've wanted to see you every day since I had to move away. The pictures just made me aware you were closer than I could have hoped."

Bella's posture relaxed again at his sincere declaration. "Did you really think the only reason I would want to see you again was a couple pictures of you in lingerie?" Edward asked, his own hurt evident in his voice.

Bella shrugged apologetically. "I didn't know what to think. It's been a shitty night, so that would be par for the course," she murmured darkly.

"_You_ are what's important. Not your body, although you've always been beautiful to me. But your mind, and your sense of humor, and your kindness. All of it together - you - are why I wanted to see you again."

Bella leaned up and brushed her lips against his after his passionate declaration, an apology and forgiveness in one. Edward nodded that he understood, and pressed his lips against hers again.

When they broke apart, he gave her a small smile. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner that I'd already seen the pictures. At first I didn't want to bring them up because I thought you'd freak out, and then as time went on, I honestly forgot about them. Besides, I had the real thing in front of me." He grinned impishly, and Bella flushed. "So, since it was pretty instrumental in getting us together, do you think you can forgive Angela for letting Ben and me see the pictures?" he asked softly.

At the reminder that she hadn't told Edward everything, Bella grimaced. "Well, I would have, until she lost the damn USB drive with all the pictures on it," she muttered resentfully.

Edward's eyebrows shot into his hairline in surprise. "She lost a USB with the pictures on it?" he repeated incredulously.

"Yeah. She bumped into someone and they both dropped a bunch of stuff, but she was late to class so she wasn't paying attention to what she was grabbing. She grabbed the wrong USB drive, which means whoever she bumped into has the pictures now," Bella explained.

"Oh, R2," he murmured, tightening his arms around her reassuringly. "It'll be ok. I mean, your face wasn't really in any of the pictures, from what I remember."

"That's what Angela said, but _you_ still recognized me apparently," Bella argued.

Edward smiled as he teased, "Well, yeah, but I think I know you better than most people, don't I?"

Bella couldn't quite contain her answering grin. "I suppose," she allowed.

"Then, it doesn't make sense to worry about it. Hopefully, nothing will come of it. And if anything does happen, we'll deal with it together, ok?"

Bella nodded and burrowed gratefully against Edward's chest. He held her tightly, feeling the rest of her tension slowly seep out of her frame. He dropped a gentle kiss to the top of her head, then smirked. "So," he drawled. "Now that you know I know about the pictures, you think Angela would give me copies of them?"

Bella reared back, gaping at him, and he wiggled his eyebrows lasciviously. She shoved him playfully, rolling her eyes. "No?" he asked. "Well, then, did you keep the outfits? Maybe you can model them for me."

"Ugh, you're such a guy," Bella complained, though she was smiling, so Edward knew she wasn't upset.

"Guilty as charged, baby. So whaddya say? I was kinda partial to the outfit for April," he offered, recalling the small, tight Batman tee-shirt and tiny, silky panties from the photographs.

Bella pulled him down for a searing kiss before moving her lips to his earlobe. "Maybe if you're a _really_ good boy," she murmured, letting her lips graze the shell of his ear as she spoke. Edward shivered as her words shot straight to his groin.

"You're a dangerous creature, Bella Swan," he growled. She just smiled innocently at him. "Want to watch a movie or something?" he offered, hoping he'd get to spend more time with her and they could unwind from the night together. He tugged on her hand to start them walking back towards their rooms.

Bella shook her head. "I need a shower," she explained, gesturing at her outfit. "Angela told me about the USB thing and I went running to clear my head. It almost worked, until I passed Cedar and thought about you seeing the pictures without me telling you they existed. So I came straight here because I knew I wouldn't be able to wait to tell you about them. I didn't realize I was several months too late," she finished, playful censure lacing her tone.

"I know, I know," Edward sighed playfully. "To make it up to you, I'll let you go shower. But, make sure you ask Angela to make me a copy of those pictures!"

"Ass," Bella chastised with a grin. "You'll _let_ me shower?" Edward nodded with an unrepentant grin. "How very magnanimous of you. I think you owe me a lot more than letting me shower to make up for omitting that little detail. See you tomorrow?"

"Can't wait," he agreed, pulling her close for a quick kiss. "I'm not kidding about those pictures, though."

Bella just rolled her eyes playfully. "Good night, 3PO."

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: So, he admitted he'd seen the pictures, and no freak out. Well...not a big freak out. Communication is such a wonderful thing.**

**And how about that Leah? Think that's the last we'll see of her? **


	22. Chapter 22

"Because,' she said, 'when you're scared but you still do it anyway, that's brave."  
~ Neil Gaiman, _Coraline_

o-o-o-o-o-o

"Hey, guess what?" Edward said as he plopped down on the sofa next to Bella in the student union lounge.

Bella glanced up from her notes and couldn't help but smile at the boyish enthusiasm on Edward's face. She decided to play along. "What?"

"You're not going to guess?"

She laughed at his over-exaggerated pout. "You actually want me to guess?"

"I'll give you a hint: and it's better than me going off on Leah." He also hoped it would take her mind off of USB-gate, but he didn't want to bring it up since that would defeat the purpose of distracting her.

She grinned, remembering how sheepish he'd been when he'd confessed to yelling at Leah. Bella couldn't care less, but he said he felt bad for taking so long to be so blunt with her. She wasn't convinced Leah would give up, but she also wasn't particularly concerned; the girl could keep being delusional, but Bella knew she didn't stand a chance at coming between her and Edward.

"I'm not sure anything can top that," she teased. "I just wish I'd been there to witness it myself. But, are you seriously going to make me guess?"

Edward's face split into a wide grin. "Nah, I'll just tell you. My folks are coming down for Thanksgiving! They're coming in Wednesday morning - you should come with me when I go meet them for dinner that night." He looked so pleased with his announcement, but the smile had fallen off Bella's face and cold dread had settled in the pit of her stomach.

She cleared her throat nervously. "Ah...They are? That's...uh...nice?"

Edward's brow furrowed at Bella's less than enthusiastic response to his news. "You don't want to see them?" he asked, confused and hurt.

"I...I just..are you sure they would want to see me?"

"Yes? Why wouldn't they?"

Bella fidgeted with the hem of her tee-shirt and wouldn't meet his questioning gaze. "I mean...I ignored you. And your mom. For no reason. I was a total brat. They can't possibly want to see me after...I did what I did. They must be so mad at me. Your mom especially," she muttered.

"Oh, R2," he breathed, leaning forward and stilling her fidgeting with a warm hand against hers. "I promise they're not mad at you. Maybe hurt, but not mad. They love you." Bella looked up at him through her eyelashes, her eyes bright with unshed tears, and he reached over and cupped her cheek gently. "I promise," he repeated earnestly. "Please come with. They'll be so happy to see you again. _Especially_ my mom."

Bella took a deep breath. _At the very least, this gives you a chance to apologize to them in person..._she rationalized. _Yeah, but what if Mims is so mad she doesn't want to hear your lame apologies? You hurt her son. You know how protective she is of him._ She sighed and glanced up at Edward again. He was watching her with a hopeful smile curling his lips. The corner of her lips turned up slightly and she knew she wouldn't be able to deny him this.

"Okay," she agreed softly. "I'll go with you."

o-o-o-o-o-o

Edward glanced sideways at Bella in the passenger seat as he navigated the car through Seattle. She was staring out the window, gnawing on her thumbnail as her knee bounced frantically. "You ok there, R2?" he asked gently.

"Yep," she answered unconvincingly, switching to a different fingernail.

He smiled ruefully and pulled her hand away from her mouth, lacing their fingers together and resting their joined hands on her bouncing knee. "Everything is going to be ok. I'll be right beside you the whole time. They don't bite, y'know."

Bella just sighed and kept staring out the window, her stomach in knots. _Easy for him to say, _she thought crossly. _It's not like he's the one who ignored them for two years._ The closer they got to the hotel, the more tense she became; by the time they parked, she felt like she was going to throw up, she was so nervous.

"Hey," Edward murmured, turning towards Bella. She met his gaze, her eyes betraying her barely contained panic. He leaned forward and captured her lips in a searing kiss, hoping that if he couldn't soothe her with words, he could distract her with actions. She answered him fervently, pouring all of her nervous energy into the kiss.

By the time he pulled away, they were both breathing heavily, but Edward was pleased to note that the frantic look in Bella's eyes had dimmed to a more manageable level. "Ready?" he asked.

"Not really," she admitted, though she unbuckled her seat belt anyway and stepped out of the car. Edward met her by her door and pulled her close.

"I'll be right next to you," he reiterated, and Bella nodded her understanding against his chest gratefully.

She nuzzled against Edward for a moment, letting his warmth and strength seep into her, then took a deep breath and squared her shoulders. "Ok. Let's do this."

Edward offered Bella his arm, and she clutched at him so tightly, he vaguely wondered if he'd have bruises later from the pressure of her grip. As he held the door to the hotel lobby open for her to precede him through, he could see his parents waiting just inside.

He hadn't actually told them Bella was going to be joining them. In fact, he hadn't mentioned her at all in the handful of times he'd spoken with his mom on the phone since he'd reunited with Bella. His mom hadn't come out and bluntly asked if he had a girl in his life now, but he could tell she suspected he had found someone special to occupy his time and his mind. He smiled to himself when he imagined Esme's reaction to seeing Bella again; he knew she'd been nearly as devastated by Bella's silence as he had, and he wanted to surprise her.

As they entered the lobby, Esme smiled warmly when she saw her son, then her grin widened when she realized he had brought a girl with him. As the pair drew nearer, Esme's jaw dropped in recognition. Edward smiled broadly at her reaction, but Bella shifted nervously under Esme's unreadable gaze.

Bella had just turned towards Edward to try and beg her way out of dinner, when she was wrapped in a strong pair of arms and Esme's familiar scent washed over her. "Oh, Bebe. Why?" Esme implored softly against her hair, and that was all it took to shatter Bella.

Tears poured down her face as she clutched at Esme, a litany of apologies pouring from her mouth. "Oh God, Mims. I'm so sorry. You were gone, and Edward was gone, and I hadn't heard from you, and it was like Mom all over again - and Dad told me it'd be easier to just let go since you had new lives so I just stopped but oh, God, I didn't want to. It hurt so much - I just wanted it to stop hurting, but he was wrong, it didn't stop, it _didn't_ and I'm sorry, so sorry," she rushed out, her words muffled against Esme's shoulder. Esme just rocked her gently back and forth, stroking her hair as Bella let go of two years worth of guilt.

"Shh, darling," she soothed once Bella's cries had subsided into shuddering breaths and hiccups. She pulled Bella away from her, cupping her tear-stained face in her hands and pressing a gentle kiss to her forehead. "I wish you would have let us explain. You replied to my email, so you knew we were having technology problems, and we tried to reach you once everything was squared away, but you were just...silent. I'm so sorry we didn't do enough before we had to leave to convince you that nothing as trivial as distance would keep us apart."

"No! No, it's not your fault!" Bella insisted, fresh tears spilling down her cheeks. "I'm the one who ignored you for no good reason. I'm the one who let stupid insecurities ruin everything. It's my fault. Please, don't hate me. Please." She buried her face in Esme's shoulder again, her tears soaking Esme's blouse.

"Oh, Bebe, I could never hate you. Not ever. You were young, and impulsive, and had been hurt by someone you loved leaving you before. And it sounds like your father didn't do much to help assuage your fears. But now that's in the past, and we can move forward, can't we? I want my Bebe in my life again."

Bella nodded enthusiastically and Esme gave her a glowing smile, then glanced around for her son. After his mom had rushed past him to greet Bella, Edward had greeted his father, then the two of them stood off to the side, giving the two women privacy for their emotional reunion. Now, he found himself engulfed in his mother's arms.

"Thank you for bringing her back to us," Esme whispered against his hair, and Edward tightened his arms around her in acknowledgment. Meanwhile, Bella shyly greeted Carlisle, and he pulled her into a warm hug, murmuring, "It's so wonderful to see you again, honey," which brought a fresh wave of tears to Bella's eyes.

As the greetings wrapped up, Edward made his way back to Bella's side, smiling down at her. Her smile mirrored his own, the icy fear that had clouded her eyes now replaced with warmth and peace. He wrapped an arm around her and turned them to face his parents.

"Mom, Dad, I want you to meet someone," he announced. Three pairs of eyes gaped at him as if he'd grown an extra head, but he continued, unperturbed. "This is Bella Swan. My girlfriend."

An indulgent smile tugged on Carlisle's lips, while Esme squealed and wrapped them both in a tight embrace. "Oh! I knew it, I knew it, I knew it! I knew you two would find your way together eventually!" Abruptly, she pulled back, an accusing glare on her face. "How long, exactly, has this been going on, Edward Anthony?"

Edward had the decency to flush, and Bella giggled at how much he resembled the little boy she grew up with, being chastised for tracking mud onto the freshly washed kitchen floor. "A couple months or so..." he muttered, shrinking under his mom's scowl.

"And you didn't think this would be something I'd like to know?" she prompted.

Edward pulled Bella a little closer, as if she would protect him from Esme's scolding. "I thought it would be a good surprise?" he defended weakly.

Esme's face broke into a radiant grin. "You were right. This is the most wonderful surprise ever! Finally, everything is exactly as it should be." Edward's shoulders slumped in relief and Bella laughed again; it was reassuring to see that some things hadn't changed in the years since they'd parted.

"Well, who's hungry?" Carlisle asked, bringing everyone back to the real reason they were there.

"Yes, let's go get something to eat," Esme agreed. "We have so much to catch up on!"

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: Say it with me, now: "Awww"**

**Now, I get to go sit in a car for 10 hours. We're driving the 5 hours to Milwuakee for my cousin's grad party, and coming back tonight so we don't have to deal with hotels and whatnot. At least it's lots of time to write.**

**See you Wednesday! **


	23. Chapter 23

"It may...be judged indecent in me to come forward on this occasion; but when I see a fellow-creature about to perish through the cowardice of her pretended friends, I wish to be allowed to speak, that I may say what I know of her character."

~ Mary Shelley, _Frankenstein_

o-o-o-o-o-o

"Good morning, Bebe!" Esme chirped when Bella opened the door the next morning. After the cathartic reunion dinner with Carlisle and Esme, Bella had invited them to spend Thanksgiving with her and her dad; it would just be the two of them otherwise, and this way, she'd not only get to spend more time with Carlisle and Esme, but also Edward. They had readily accepted, and she'd gone home to let her dad know they were having guests, giddy at the prospect of having everyone together for the holiday.

"Good morning. I thought I told you that you didn't need to bring anything!" she scolded, seeing Esme's arms laden with boxes from Bakery Nouveau. She peeked under the lids and practically drooled when she saw muffins and pastries for breakfast, as well as a pumpkin pie and a salted caramel apple pie for after dinner.

"You did," Esme agreed as she brushed past Bella, heading towards the kitchen. "I just didn't listen."

Bella huffed in mock frustration, then turned to greet Carlisle and Edward, who were still standing on the porch. "You should know better than to think that woman can show up anywhere empty handed," Carlisle laughed as he stepped into the foyer, Edward close behind him.

"Yes, but I thought maybe with the short notice and everything, she might not be able to find anything," Bella agreed, laughing. "Dad's in the living room, watching the pre-game show."

"Who's he rooting for this year?"

"The Panthers, but only because they're playing Dallas, and he roots for whoever is playing against Dallas."

"Well, I think I'll grab one of those pastries and join him - you don't need me fumbling my way around the kitchen and getting in your way," Carlisle suggested.

Bella grinned, remembering several occasions when she'd witnessed his attempts at cooking. He was a brilliant surgeon, but give the man anything larger than a scalpel and he became a menace to himself and anyone in his near vicinity. "Of course. I don't think any of us want to have turkey with a side of blood." Carlisle grinned at her and wandered off in the direction of the living room.

That left Bella and Edward alone in the foyer. "Hi," he murmured, stepping closer to her and brushing a soft kiss across her lips.

"Hi yourself," she replied, pressing her lips more firmly against his. "Happy Thanksgiving."

"Happy Thanksgiving. And I have so much to be thankful for this year," he agreed.

"I see your mom isn't the only one who brought food. She brought pastries, and you brought cheese," Bella teased, deflecting his words with humor.

Edward growled playfully and caged her against the wall. "Admit it, you like my cheese."

Bella shrugged, then smiled softly. "I like _you_," she corrected.

"I like you, too," he murmured, pressing closer and lowering his lips to hers again, slipping his tongue past the seam of her lips. They stayed pressed together for a long moment, until they heard Esme clattering about in the kitchen. Edward pulled away slowly. "I suppose we should go help her, huh?" he asked.

Bella nodded, though all she wanted to do was keep kissing Edward. _Who needs food when you have Edward kisses to sustain you?_ "Probably," she agreed. "But we're doing more of that later."

"Duh," he agreed, and Bella laughed. He stepped back to let her away from the wall, and led her towards the kitchen, their hands intertwined. Esme smiled at them as they stepped into the small space. She had already begun pulling out ingredients for dinner, and had started the oven and several pots of water for boiling.

"What's the plan, Bebe?" she asked.

"Turkey, stuffing, potatoes, corn, green beans, rolls, cranberries..." Bella ticked off on her fingers as she perused the items Esme had pulled from the pantry. "Turkey and stuffing in the oven, obviously. The rolls just need to be warmed up right at the end, and the rest is stove top. We should probably prep the stuffing first. I've already got the turkey brining, so there's not much to do there until the stuffing is ready. Potatoes would probably be the next thing that will take the longest to prepare."

"Well, I can do the potatoes if you and Edward want to take on the stuffing," Esme offered.

Bella nodded, finding the recipe card for the mashed potatoes and setting Esme up at the table with a cutting board and a pile of potatoes. She snagged a cherry almond croissant out of one of the bakery boxes, munching away happily as she gathered the items for her stuffing. The trio chatted easily as they set about chopping up the various ingredients, and before Bella knew it, the turkey was stuffed and in the oven.

"Smells good, honey," Charlie offered when they made their way to the living room. "Edward, good to see you again."

"Thanks, Charlie, you too," Edward said, settling onto the couch and pulling Bella down next to him.

They made polite small talk as they watched Carolina trounce Dallas, Bella and Esme getting up occasionally to check on the meal. The smells coming out of the kitchen were mouthwatering, and Edward wasn't sure how much longer he could take the delicious torture. Finally, Bella announced dinner was ready.

Everyone gathered around the small kitchen table, piling their plates high with the decadent feast laid out before them. At first, the only sounds at the table where those of silverware hitting dishes, and contented sounds of appreciation as the food was devoured. But as they all began to slow down, Esme set her fork down, and dabbed her napkin daintily at the corners of her mouth.

"So, Charlie," she began, casting a tight smile at him. "You can't imagine how thrilled we were to see Bella again yesterday when Edward brought her with for dinner. We've been missing her terribly since we left, and it was absolutely the best surprise to discover we'd get to have her back in our lives."

Bella cast a worried glance at Edward, but he just shrugged, not knowing where his mom was going with this topic. He didn't have to wonder long, as Esme continued, "Of course, if she hadn't been given some _appallingly_ bad advice after we left, we wouldn't have needed a reunion; she could have been a part of our lives the whole time."

Charlie furrowed his brows at her, confused by her suddenly cold demeanor. "I'm not sure I know what you mean, Esme."

She pointed an accusing finger at him. "How _dare_ you tell Bella that we were just going to forget her after we moved? She was alone and insecure, feeling abandoned, and not only did you not reassure her, you practically confirmed that those feelings were accurate! She needed you to comfort her, not poison her with your own bias."

Flustered, Charlie pushed his chair away from the table. "Now, listen here! I only had her best interests in mind. She was better off not getting her hopes up - people leave and they lose touch. It's just what happens."

"No," Esme disagreed, practically snarling. "You did _not_ have her best interests in mind. Now, I can understand that Renee leaving hurt you and shook a lot of your beliefs. But, I am not Renee. _Edward_ is not Renee. And all you accomplished by suggesting we _were_ like Renee was making all of us miserable for years. _All_ of that pain could have been avoided. And _then - _to send back the letters and cards we sent to her? Don't think I didn't recognize your handwriting. You _knew_ we were trying to stay in touch with her but you _deliberately_ kept us from her. I can't even begin to fathom your thought process, but I _know_ it had _nothing_ to do with Bella's best interests. You should be ashamed of yourself ."

Bella gaped at Esme, then slid her eyes over to her father. "Dad?" she breathed in disbelief, willing him to refute Esme's claim.

Charlie's face grew red as he tried to come up with a retort; his mouth opened and shut soundlessly a few times, but no words came forth. Suddenly, the loud vibration of a phone broke through the tense silence. Charlie flinched at the unexpected noise, then pulled his phone out of his pocket. "Hello?" he answered, gruffly. "Uh huh. How many?" He sighed, although Edward thought it sounded more relieved than frustrated. "Yeah, give me 15." He hung up the call and glanced around the table. "Uh...pileup on the 522. I've gotta go help out," he explained as he stood. "Thanks for dinner, Bella. It was great. Cullens, Happy Thanksgiving." He dropped a quick kiss on the top of Bella's head, then fled out the front door.

Bella's eyes flicked back and forth from Esme, to the door, to Edward, trying to comprehend the last few minutes. Edward's face matched hers, surprised and confused, but Esme just smiled serenely as she stood and began clearing dishes off the table, cheerfully asking, "Now, who wants pie?"

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: Well...that just happened. Show of hands, who wants to smack Charlie upside the head? Everyone? Can't blame you**

**The trip went surprisingly well! Everyone was super excited to see us, we got some good family time in, and there was only one melt-down. I count that as a success! See you Saturday. **


	24. Chapter 24

"Now I know what a piece of bacon feels like when it is suddenly picked out of the pan on a fork and put back on the shelf!"  
"No you don't!" he heard Dori answering, "because the bacon knows that it will get back in the pan sooner or later; and it is to be hoped we shan't. Also eagles aren't forks!"

~ J.R.R. Tolkien, _The Hobbit_

o-o-o-o-o-o

"Ugh, that was the most horrifyingly awkward Thanksgiving dinner ever," Bella whined as she flopped onto her bed after bidding good night to Carlisle and Esme. Edward shut the door behind them, settling himself on the edge of the mattress.

He rubbed a soothing hand over her back. "It wasn't _that_ bad," he argued, trying to contain his laughter, knowing she wouldn't appreciate him finding humor in the situation.

"I know you want to laugh. Go ahead," she grumped, her voice muffled by her pillow, and at her permission, Edward let loose in peals of laughter. His mirth was contagious, and soon Bella found herself laughing just as hard as him.

After a moment, Bella sobered and regarded Edward. "Did you really write me letters?"

"Yes," he confirmed with a sad smile. "A couple of letters right at the beginning, and a birthday and Christmas card, but after they all came back without having been opened, I figured you were serious about not wanting to have anything to do with me so I stopped. My mom never told me it was your dad's handwriting on the envelopes for the 'Return to Sender', though."

"What did they say?" Bella wondered, her chest hurting at the thought that they'd been kept from her deliberately.

Edward shrugged as the tips of his ears pinked. "I don't really remember," he hedged, though he could recall with perfect clarity the letters begging her to talk to him, declaring his love for her, pleading for forgiveness for whatever transgression he'd committed.

"Do you still have them?" she pressed. "I wish I could have read them..." Edward shrugged, not wanting to admit he kept them in a box with all the other mementos of their friendship.

"It was just stuff about Alaska, saying I missed you, hoping you would talk to me again," he explained, hoping to appease her curiosity. "All stuff we've talked about since we got back together."

Bella nodded, contemplating his words. She sensed there was more in the letters than he was admitting, but didn't want to make the night any more uncomfortable, so she let the subject drop. "I'm sorry he did that," she apologized quietly.

"You obviously had no idea. It's not your fault your dad was a dick," Edward disagreed, leaning over to press a reassuring kiss to her forehead.

"I guess. I just wish I understood _why_. I mean, he seemed to like you just fine while you lived here, then you move and all of a sudden he's doing everything he can to keep me away from you."

Edward shrugged. "Yeah...it didn't work though. I mean, it did for a while but...not anymore, right?"

"Right," Bella agreed quickly, giving him a shy smile. He returned her grin, then looked around her room, trying to come up with something to lift the heavy mood that had settled over them.

"Things here haven't changed much, huh?" he observed, noting very few differences since the last time he'd been in her room. Different picture frames and artwork, some string lights hung above the bed that hadn't been there before, but otherwise essentially the same. He stood up and looked out the window, towards his old room, then turned back to Bella with a mischievous smirk.

"Rose lives there now, right?" he asked, and Bella nodded in confirmation, her eyes dancing with confusion. His smirk widened. "Think she'd let us into my old room? I have some teenage fantasies involving you in my room that I'd like to make reality."

"I was in your room plenty," Bella protested, not understanding his meaning.

"Fantasies involving you in my _bed_, R2," he clarified, wiggling his eyebrows lasciviously.

Bella flushed at his suggestive tone, and she gave him an embarrassed roll of her eyes. "No, perv," she reprimanded playfully.

"That's ok," Edward conceded, turning and stalking towards her. "I had plenty of fantasies that involved your bed, too." Bella giggled as he crawled up the bed until he hovered over her, caging her in with his arms. She slid her hands into the soft hair at the nape of his neck, tugging his head down and capturing his lips. Edward tilted his head, deepening the kiss, his tongue tangling with Bella's. After several long moments, he sensed Bella slowing the kiss, so he lifted his head away slightly, their panting breath mingling as he gazed down at her.

"What kind of fantasies?" she asked, a coy smile tugging at her lips. Edward groaned and flopped onto his side next to her, regarding her warily.

"You really want to know?" he asked eventually, and Bella nodded. "It's really embarrassing," he warned.

"Don't be embarrassed," she soothed, before she blushed, admitting quietly, "I had fantasies about you, too, y'know."

"Reaaaalllly?" he drawled, teasing but intrigued.

Bella rolled her eyes and pushed on his chest. "Of course I did. I'll show you mine if you show me yours."

Edward quirked an eyebrow at her choice of phrase. "Well, _that_ was certainly one of them," he laughed.

"Shut up, you know what I meant," she growled, trying to keep the stern expression on her face but failing miserably.

"Yeah, I know what you meant," he agreed, smiling cheekily. "But you showing me yours was _definitely_ high on my list of fantasies."

Bella reached down to the hem of her shirt and arched her back, tugging the garment off over her head. "Like this?"

Edward's eyes widened, and he swallowed thickly. "Yeah," he croaked, reaching out to skim his hand over the delicate skin of her ribcage, a trail of gooseflesh following his touch. "I miss having a window just across from you," he murmured, nuzzling against Bella's neck and letting his lips catch on the smooth skin there. "The view was awesome."

"Mmm," she hummed contentedly, running her fingers through his hair gently. "What do you mean by that?"

Edward swallowed, realizing he'd just opened himself up to some awkward confessions. He tried to backtrack, saying, "Oh...nothing...uh. Just you? There?"

"You're such a terrible liar," Bella teased gently. "That bad, huh?"

Edward blew out a resigned breath, steeling himself for Bella's reaction. "I...uh...may have seen you," he admitted, then clarifying, "Changing."

Bella's hand stilled against his head, and her voice shook slightly as she asked, "Changing how?"

"Um...when we were like...12 or 13. You had gone shopping with my mom..." he trailed off, too afraid to meet her gaze.

"12 or 13?" Bella searched her memory for a time when she'd gone shopping with Esme around that age. Edward could tell when the memory hit her; she stiffened next to him, and she groaned, long and low. "Seriously?" she asked, her tone begging him to correct her assumption.

"Yeah," he admitted, a confirmation and an apology in one. "I only saw one before I realized what I was seeing, then I shut my blinds."

Bella groaned again, rolling away from him and burying her face in the pillow. "Kill me now, please," she muttered, her words muffled.

"Hey," Edward scolded softly, brushing her hair away from her face. "It's not that bad." Bella tilted her head towards him a little, rolled her eyes at him, then buried her face in the pillow again. He couldn't help but laugh. Rubbing her back gently, he decided to level the playing field a bit. "If it makes you feel any better, I had my first wet dream that night after seeing you."

"_What_?!" Bella screeched, flipping over and gaping at him with wide eyes. He cupped the back of his neck nervously and nodded. "Why would that make me feel better?" she asked, bewildered.

Edward barked out a self-conscious laugh. "Uh...I guess 'cause it's embarrassing? So now you're not the only one embarrassed?"

Bella's face softened as she considered his words. As mortified as she was that he'd been witness to her pre-pubescent awkwardness, she recognized that not many guys would admit something like that just to make her feel better. A soft smile spread across her face, her heart swelling with tenderness for him.

Feeling like she needed to lighten the mood again, she pressed against him, whispering, "So which one did you see?"

"What?"

"Which bra?" she clarified.

Edward flushed a deep shade of red. "Oh...uh...I don't remember..."

"Liar."

He gave her a pleading look, begging her not to push, but Bella just raised her eyebrows at him and waited patiently. Finally, he gave a resigned sigh. "It was black, with the little white dots all over it. And there was a little rose in the middle, between...between your..."

"Breasts," she supplied, smiling at his hesitance to say the word even though hers were on full display at the moment. Edward swallowed, his eyes flicking down to her chest momentarily before meeting her gaze again guiltily. Bella smirked at him, and he flushed again. She pushed on his shoulder, rolling him onto his back and clambering up so she was straddling his waist.

"And what was I doing in this dream you had?" she purred, trailing her fingers down his chest before dipping under the hem of his shirt and splaying across his stomach.

Edward gave a strangled laugh and settled his hands on her hips, his fingertips flexing into the soft flesh there. "Uh...you're actually basically doing it right now," he admitted.

Bella glanced down at their position and smiled. "Ok, so I straddled you. Was that all?" Edward shook his head no, squeezing his eyes shut and willing his body not to react exactly the same way as it had to the dream; he didn't want to make a mess in his shorts and embarrass himself even further. "What did I do after I straddled you?" she asked, leaning down to nip at his neck, her breasts pressing deliciously against his chest.

"You uh..." he began, then cleared his throat. "Um...you reached back and undid your bra."

"Like this?" she asked, leaning up and releasing the hook-and-eye closures with a flick of her wrist. Edward watched the fabric loosen around her shoulders and chest, just as it had in his memory countless times. He nodded, unable to draw his eyes away from her barely covered breasts, his erection twitching impatiently in his jeans. "Then what?" she whispered.

His eyes shot to hers, and he flushed with embarrassment again. "Uh...you started to take it off and..."

"And?" she prompted, reaching up to begin removing the garment.

Edward didn't actually want to admit it, but he felt compelled to tell her the truth. "And...that was the...end." He caught the confusion flash across her face, and he quickly defended, "Hey, I was 13!"

Bella's lips twisted as she tried to contain her amused smile. She was secretly pleased that just the thought of her taking off her bra had been enough to set off a 13 year-old Edward. She had a feeling it wasn't enough for 19 year-old Edward though, and she didn't want his embarrassment to ruin the night.

"So if it hadn't ended...that way...how would you have wanted it to end?" she asked softly. He glanced up at her, still wallowing in the embarrassing confession. "Would I have taken my bra all the way off?" she prompted gently.

Edward's eyes widened, realizing what she was offering, and he nodded his head minutely. She smiled warmly at him, reaching up to slip the straps off her shoulders before pulling the cups away from her chest. Edward's mouth went dry as she bared herself to him. Without thinking, he reached up and cupped the creamy flesh, his thumbs sweeping gently across the sensitive peaks.

Bella sucked in a startled breath at the unexpected contact, then arched into the pleasurable touch, laughing breathlessly, "Well, I guess I don't need to ask what you would have done _after_ my bra was off." Edward chuckled and shook his head, though his hands didn't stray from their current resting place.

"So what would be after this?" Bella prodded, skating her hands over his chest and back to the hem of his shirt.

"I don't know, R2," he rasped. "There's not really enough blood in my brain at the moment to come up with this stuff."

She laughed again, before leaning down and brushing her lips against his. He arched up, trying to get more contact, but she pulled away. "Can I tell you how _I've_ thought it might go?" Edward blinked up at her, his mind unable to keep up with her thought process due to the sensory overload of her hips straddling his and her breasts in his hands. At his blank look, she whispered playfully, "Fantasies, 3PO. You showed me yours, so can I show you mine?"

When she felt Edward's erection twitch against her thigh at her words, she smiled wolfishly. "I'll take that as a yes," she purred. "So the way I've imagined it, next, you'd take your shirt off."

Edward had already whipped his shirt off over his head before she'd finished her sentence. Bella took in the sight of him below her, starting at the wild disarray of his hair from the quick removal of his shirt, down to his eyes, dark with lust, settling on the wide expanse of his bare chest.

She'd seen him shirtless before, having spent many summer days lounging by the community pool or at the lake with him, and he'd always been lean. But, as she cast her eyes over him hungrily, she noted new dips and ridges that hadn't existed the last time she'd seen him.

"Now what?" Edward murmured, his voice husky.

"Now? Now I kiss you," she replied, leaning down. He met her halfway, their chests brushing together at the same time as their lips. Bella gasped at the contact of his warm, bare skin against hers, and Edward groaned into her mouth. He hadn't realized how intense the sensation of their naked flesh pressed together would be, and he banded his arms around her, locking her in place.

They kissed for long minutes, slow and deep. As their kisses intensified, Edward began shifting his hips, instinctively seeking friction against the warm heat of Bella hovering above him. Pleasure shot through him at the contact, but when he flexed his hips again, Bella had moved her hips away.

"Ah, ah," she chastised gently against his lips. "This is _my_ fantasy, and that's not how it goes."

Edward tried to catch his breath, but his words still came out sounding as if he'd just run several miles. "So, how _does_ it go?"

"Let me show you," she whispered, dropping a lingering kiss to the sensitive skin below his ear. He was so caught up in the feeling of her lips on his skin that he almost missed feeling her fingertips drag down his torso, over his stomach, before catching on the waistband of his pants. Almost.

His breath hitched as she unbuttoned and unzipped his jeans, slipping her fingers beneath the fabric and sliding both them and boxers down his legs. So far, he liked where this fantasy was going. When he'd kicked the garments onto the floor, he met Bella's gaze, surprisingly at ease considering he had never been naked in front of a girl before. But this was Bella, his R2, and everything was right when he was with her.

Bella took a deep breath to calm her nerves as she let her eyes wander over Edward's body. Smooth, pale skin with swirls of soft, dark hair on his chest and stomach, and lower, his eager cock resting hot and heavy against his stomach, nestled in coarser, darker hair. Taking one more deep breath for confidence, she leaned down, pressing her lips gently to the center of his chest.

As she let her lips skim over his torso, Edward fisted his hands in the sheets at his sides, reveling in the intense pleasure. Bella let her lips skim over his nipple, her tongue flicking out to tease the sensitive peak, and he let out a surprised gasp. She repeated the move on his other nipple, then shifted lower, lips, tongue, and teeth working down his torso slowly, until Edward thought he'd go crazy from want.

"Please," he whispered on a strangled breath, when Bella was level with his straining erection. Evidence of his anticipation had already leaked from the tip, leaving a wet smear against his abdomen. She smiled at his eager plea, delighted she could affect him so deeply.

"Well, since you asked so nicely," she murmured.

All coherent thought fled from Edward's mind as her warm mouth engulfed him; he wasn't even sure he was breathing. This may not have been a part of his first fantasy about Bella, but it had certainly been one of the myriad of fantasies he'd indulged in since then. Nothing could have prepared him for this, though.

"Jesus," he hissed as Bella swirled her tongue around the swollen head, paying special attention to the ridge at the front. Her hand flexed around the base of his shaft, then trailed down to cup his balls, rolling the sensitive flesh gently between her fingers.

Edward wanted this experience to last forever, but his body had other ideas. Within moments, he could feel his balls tightening as the glorious tension of his impending orgasm settled low in his spine. "Bella, I'm gonna - oh, God..." he groaned as she hollowed her cheeks around him. It was too intense, and he went rigid a moment before relaxing completely, his release shooting in long streams into Bella's mouth.

She released him gently and crawled her way back up his body, dropping another lingering kiss just over his racing heart on her way. She nestled against his side, and Edward managed to find enough strength to wrap his arms around her and press her close.

When he'd caught his breath and his heart rate had returned to an almost-normal pace, he slipped a finger under Bella's chin, tilting her face up and dropping a soft kiss to her lips. Though the kiss started off sweetly enough, soon they were clinging to each other in a panting mess of tangled limbs.

Seeing Edward fall apart under her ministrations had worked Bella up, and now with the way he was kissing her, she couldn't help pressing her thighs together, seeking relief. Edward noticed her shifting impatiently against him and smiled.

Bella sighed breathily when his hand snaked down to cup her through her jeans. "Can I...?" he trailed off, his hand drifting to the fly of her pants suggestively.

"Yes," she gasped as he tugged at the button then slid his hand inside. His fingers slipped easily between her slick folds, and he groaned at the sensation at the same time she did. His range of movement was limited, and he tugged impatiently at her jeans until she helped him remove them, leaving the fabric bunched around her ankles.

Edward let his lips linger on her neck and collarbone for a moment, showering attention on the smooth skin there, before sliding lower. He ghosted his mouth over the curve of her breast, through the gentle valley between, before shifting to capture a rosy nipple gently with his lips. Lower, his fingers continued to work, swirling and pressing lightly.

Bella couldn't decide what to do - arch her back to allow Edward further access to her breasts, or flex her hips to garner more friction from his teasing fingers. Before she could make a decision, Edward gave a final flick of his tongue, then moved away from her breasts, lower, down her soft belly until his nose brushed her hip bones.

For a moment, she stiffened, a dozen insecurities flashing through her mind as Edward nuzzled the soft hairs on her mound. _What if he thinks I'm too hairy? What if I smell bad? What if I taste bad? What if it feels weird and I don't like it?_ All of her concerns were wiped away with the first flick of his tongue against her aching flesh.

Bella gasped, fisting her sheets tightly in her hands as molten heat spread through her abdomen. Ever the perfectionist, Edward tested all the different ways he could draw a reaction from Bella, laving her with the flat of his tongue, then just the tip, smooth strokes, then quick flicks of his tongue; by the time Edward focused on her throbbing bundle of nerves she was arching her hips shamelessly against his mouth.

Moments later, the dam burst and wave after wave of pleasure washed over her. She arched her back and gasped his name on a shuddering breath before melting, boneless, back onto the mattress. Edward wiped his face on the back of his hand then leaned down and fished around on the floor for his boxers, sliding them on gingerly. The temptation of her naked body against his would be too much, and he didn't want to risk starting something they wouldn't be able to finish before Charlie returned.

"Was that ok?" Bella asked shyly when Edward had wrapped his arms around her and she was settled against his chest

Edward gave her an incredulous look. "Shouldn't I be asking you that?"

Bella flushed, embarrassed to admit her insecurities. "Well, I mean...I don't know. Hair? And...taste?" she muttered, burying her face against his side to hide her mortification.

" I could ask you the same thing," he replied, though his words were gently teasing.

"It was fine," Bella objected immediately, then amended softly. "Perfect. I loved affecting you like that."

"Ditto, Bella. You're perfect. I can't think of a better Thanksgiving dessert."

Bella rolled her eyes, a smile tugging the corner of her lips. "God, you're cheesy."

"You love it."

_I love you._ Bella blinked at the thought that came immediately to mind. It was true, she did love him, but after all the emotion of the day already, she didn't want to toss that emotion in as well. And, truth be told, she was afraid of saying it first; maybe she had hurt him too much during their separation and he wouldn't return the sentiment. Best to wait with that admission, she decided.

"I do," she murmured instead, snuggling against his side and basking in the joy of being in his arms, incredibly thankful for her second chance.

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: My bad. It completely slipped my mind to post on Saturday...I don't even have a good reason for forgetting. Hopefully this was worth the few extra days wait, though :)**

**Lots of anger towards Charlie, though a few of you said you were reserving judgement until you heard his side of things. And lots of love for Esme, though a few of you said her timing could have been better. I love seeing your reactions like that. **

**Barring another brain meltdown, I'll see you Wednesday. **


	25. Chapter 25

"Chronic remorse, as all the moralists are agreed, is a most undesirable sentiment. If you have behaved badly, repent, make what amends you can and address yourself to the task of behaving better next time."

~ Aldous Huxley, _Brave New World_

o-o-o-o-o-o

Charlie stood awkwardly in the hallway outside Bella's room. This was not going to be a fun conversation, but it was long overdue. He took a deep breath to center himself before knocking gently on the door.

"Bella?"

"Go away."

"I want to talk to you about what happened."

"Why? It's not like you wanted to talk to me about it before Esme called you out." He winced, but couldn't deny the truth in her words.

"Just open the door, kid."

Bella sighed, then heaved herself off of the bed. She took her time crossing the room, and only opened the door just enough to peek out into the hallway.

"Yes?" she asked, her voice saccharine sweet.

"Come on, Bells. Let's be adults about this. Come downstairs. I made cider," he offered, not above bribing her with her favorite autumn drink.

She huffed, but opened the door wider and stepped into the hallway, giving Charlie a wide berth. Without looking back, she clomped down the stairs and dropped into a chair at the dining room table.

"Well?" she goaded when Charlie had settled himself across from her.

He narrowed his eyes at her disrespectful tone, but bit his tongue. He knew chiding her on her tone would only serve to alienate her further at this point.

"Look, I know you don't agree with my reasoning -" he started.

Bella interrupted by snorting, "Obviously," under her breath. He gave her a pointed look before clearing his throat and repeating. "I know you don't agree with my reasoning, but I truly did think it was the best way to protect you."

"Why? What on earth could make you think that was a good idea?"

"Bella, you're my little girl. I'm supposed to keep you safe, protect you from all the bad things in the world. When you were little, and the biggest thing I had to protect you from was the monsters in your closet, I could handle that. But, when your mom left... I couldn't protect you from that, and it killed me. I swore to myself to never let you get hurt like that again."

"But Edward and Esme and Carlisle aren't Mom. And it's not like they just packed up in the middle of the night and were suddenly gone. I knew they were moving. I wasn't happy about it, but I had a little time to prepare. And then you preyed on my insecurities and kept them away from me."

"Do you remember those first few months, just after Mom left?"

Bella frowned at his sudden change in topic. "Yes?"

"Do you remember getting those postcards from your mom?"

Bella thought back, fuzzy memories of colorful postcards from far-away places and grand stories of adventures. They'd showed up every few weeks for a few months, then slowly tapered off. "Yes," she affirmed.

"Do you remember what happened each time you got one of those?" When Bella furrowed her brows and shook her head no, Charlie sighed, then smiled ruefully. "Your face would light up like a Christmas tree, and you'd run up to your tree house and just sit up there for hours, studying every little thing about the cards. You'd tell me all about it over dinner. And then the next day, you'd run down to the mail box, so hopeful that there would be a new note from her. Of course, there wasn't, and you tried so hard not to show how disappointed you were, but it was obvious. But you kept going down to the mail box, getting more and more upset with each day that passed without a new postcard."

"As time went on, the postcards got further and further apart, and you would get more and more depressed. At one point, when it had been nearly two months since her last postcard, there were a few weeks where you didn't come out of your room except for school and to go to the bathroom. The only way I could get you to eat was to send Edward in with your supper. I didn't know what to do for you. It's not like I could make it better, make it go away. You were a little girl who'd lost her mother, but without the decency of a clean break. She kept stringing you along, keeping your hopes up, when she and I both knew she had no intention of coming back."

"So, when I learned the Cullens were moving to Alaska, I was afraid the same thing would happen again, except on a bigger scale. You'd already lost your mom, so you were sensitive to that kind of thing, and rightfully so, but you were also _so _dependent on Edward. I knew that if he did to you what your mom did, you'd never recover."

"Then you had Rosalie, and then Emmett, and it seemed like you were doing ok with moving on. I know you don't agree with what I did, but I honestly thought it would be easier for you if you had a clean break," he finished, letting out a long breath.

Bella sat back in her chair, absorbing Charlie's words and collecting her thoughts. Finally, she spoke. "You're right," she said softly. "I don't agree with what you did. I think it was overbearing and cruel to make that decision for me."

"I understand that," he interjected. "But, Bella, this is the 21st Century. Letters aren't exactly the first choice of communication for most people. I figured if he was writing you letters, you'd already made the break in electronic communications, and I was just saving you from having to ignore him in a different medium."

Bella cringed, but couldn't deny he had a point. Edward would never have had to resort to writing her letters if she hadn't ignored his emails and texts. Still... "Maybe the letters would have convinced me I'd made a mistake in cutting him off," she argued. "They could have shown me how serious he was about staying a part of my life."

Charlie shrugged. "Maybe. But there's no point arguing the what-if's. I can't change what I did. And I know it sounds harsh, but by my way of thinking, if your own mother could just up and abandon you... what's to say that he couldn't do the same thing to you?"

"But Edward wasn't like Mom," Bella started to argue, but Charlie interrupted her gently.

"You didn't know that at the time, Bella."

She crossed her arms over her chest and scowled. "Neither did you," she huffed, and he held his hands up in surrender.

"Look, you're my baby girl. No matter how old you get, you are always my baby girl, and it's always going to be my job to try to protect you from the evils of the world. I was just trying to protect you. Now, in hindsight, I probably ended up causing more hurt than I prevented. But, I'm also honestly glad they're back in your life. I just want what's best for you, and I haven't seen you so happy in a really long time. And I don't want you to hate me."

"Dad," Bella sighed, scrubbing her hands over her face. "Yeah, ok. It was shitty. And I get the whole 'hindsight is 20/20' thing, but it's just so fucked up. I can't just be over it, you know? I need time to work through everything. I don't hate you, but I'm still pissed."

Charlie pushed his chair back from the table and stood, dropping his hand to Bella's shoulder. "I can understand that, honey. I just want you to be happy."

"Edward makes me happy," she murmured.

"I know, honey," he said, squeezing her shoulder gently before heading upstairs.

Bella slumped against the back of her chair, the emotional weight of the past few days settling heavily over her. She never thought she'd say this, but going back to class would be a relief; at least in her classes there was a definitive right answer.

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: Oh, Charlie...so he may have gone about things the completely wrong way, but he really was trying to protect her. Dads do that sometimes. **

**See you Saturday!**


	26. Chapter 26

"With a secret like that, at some point the secret itself becomes irrelevant. The fact that you kept it does not."

~ Sara Gruen, _Water for Elephants_

o-o-o-o-o-o

Bella was curled on her desk chair as she surfed the internet, pointedly ignoring the way Angela would glance imploringly at her every few minutes from her spot at her own desk. She was still furious with her roommate.

First, she'd given the photographs of Bella to Ben after having sworn she wouldn't let anyone else see them. Then she'd kept that information from Bella for months, and might never have admitted it if Edward hadn't inadvertently sold her out. And last, but certainly not least, she'd lost a USB drive containing all of the pictures of Bella. Every. Single. Picture. Out there, floating around on campus somewhere, where anyone could have found them, and could be doing who knows what with them.

Bella growled under her breath as she typed in a new search. She'd been compulsively checking to see if someone had posted the pictures online somewhere; it had been nearly two weeks since Angela lost the USB drive, and she couldn't decide if the fact that the pictures had yet to surface was a good sign or a bad one. Add in the emotional rollercoaster of her Thanksgiving, and she was feeling less than forgiving.

"Bella," Angela started, her tone beseeching. She'd apologized at least a dozen times, though she knew her words didn't change the fact that she'd broken Bella's trust. One more apology couldn't hurt.

A knock on their door interrupted Angela's latest attempt at mending their friendship, and Bella launched out of her chair gratefully. She didn't think she had the heart to turn down another of Angela's heartfelt apologies.

"Kronk!" she exclaimed when she flung the door open. "What are you doing here? Did we have plans I forgot about?"

He shuffled from foot to foot as his ears tinged pink. "No, uh...no plans. Can we...talk?"

Bella furrowed her brows in concern. "Of course. Want to go walk around the quad?"

"Actually, it's kinda...private."

"Oh," she said, a little surprised by his serious tone. "Well, Angela's here..."

"I can go to the library!" Angela piped in, more than willing to make the small sacrifice if it might help smooth Bella's frustration with her.

Emmett shot Angela a grateful smile, but Bella kept her eyes trained on Emmett. "Is something wrong, Em?"

"I don't know," he hedged. "That's what I want to figure out."

Angela stuffed her laptop and a few notebooks into her bag before squeezing around Emmett and Bella, leaving them standing awkwardly in the doorway.

"Well, come in then," Bella offered, settling herself onto the edge of her bed. Emmett straddled her desk chair, facing her with a solemn expression on his face. "Please tell me what's wrong."

Emmett fidgeted in the chair for a few moments, looking anywhere but at her, before finally blurting out, "Are you cheating on Edward?"

Bella was glad she was sitting, because if she'd been standing, she likely would have keeled over from shock at his outburst. "What?" she gasped. "Why on _Earth_ would you ask me that?"

Emmett wrung his hands together, glancing up at her. "My roommate, Riley?" He paused, and Bella nodded that she knew who he was talking about. She'd met him a few times when she'd gone over to meet Emmett before a run or when they'd meet up for lunch. Riley hadn't said more than a handful of words in her presence, and while he seemed like a nice enough guy, Bella had gotten the impression he was incredibly shy.

"I came back from class the other night, and he must not have heard me come in - he was really focused on his computer. When I went to put my stuff on my desk, I could see his screen better, and he was looking at these pictures of a chick...like...a mostly naked chick. At first I didn't think anything of it, 'cause, y'know..." he trailed off uncomfortably. He and Bella were close friends, but things like that were not usually openly discussed, so he felt awkward alluding to it.

"But...when he noticed me, he got all red and tried to shut his laptop really quick. I tried to tell him it was no big deal, we all look at shit like that, but he was so squirrelly about it. So, thinking it might calm him down if he thought we were more...bros...I asked him to send me the link to the site, 'cause they looked hot."

Emmett took a deep, shuddering breath before pressing on. "But, then he tells me they're not on a site, they're his, and I'm thinking 'Nice, dude found himself a chick!' and that's why he's so squirrely, because he doesn't want me to see his girlfriend like that. But, then he shoots that theory to shit, because he opens up his laptop and starts showing them off."

Bella's heart was pounding as the pieces fell into place during Emmett's little speech. Pictures of a mostly naked girl, Emmett thinking she was cheating on Edward. She opened her mouth to explain, but Emmett cut her off.

"Bella," he implored. "Why did you give Riley pictures of you in your underwear?"

She couldn't help it. The giddy relief of knowing who had the USB drive of pictures, coupled with the absurdity of the thought that she would cheat on Edward, made mirth bubble up in her chest until she was laughing hysterically, tears rolling down her face.

Emmett stared at her with a sort of horrified fascination on his face. Of all the reactions he had expected while preparing to bring this up, laughter was not one of them. He just gaped at her until her laughter trailed off into intermittent giggles, and she wiped the tears from her eyes.

"Oh, Kronk, I'm sorry," she offered, trying to calm down. "I'm not laughing at you. I didn't give Riley those pictures." She explained what had happened, from Angela needing a model for her photography project, to Angela losing the USB drive, and the ensuing panic over where the pictures had ended up.

"So, you see, I'm just so...happy that it was Riley who found the pictures. It could have ended up so badly, and I've been so worried this whole week. I've even been checking all these sites like 'College Girls Gone Wild' just waiting for those pictures to show up there. And then, the idea that I'd cheat on Edward is probably the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard, so there's that..." she finished, a wide smile splitting her face.

Emmett regarded her carefully, searching her face for any hint of deceit. He had hoped he knew her well enough to know she wouldn't cheat on Edward, but he hadn't quite known how to reconcile his roommate having pictures like that of Bella. Satisfied by the pure joy radiating off of her, his grin matched her own.

"God, I can't believe I asked him to send me nudie pics of my best friend," he moaned, and Bella flushed.

"Sorry," she offered sheepishly.

"Not your fault," he dismissed. "But...why didn't you tell me earlier? About taking the pictures, or losing them? I mean, you told Rose about taking them. Did you tell her about Angela losing them?"

Bella grimaced at the hurt look on Emmett's face. "No, I didn't tell anyone but Edward about losing the pictures. I was already thinking about it 24/7, I figured there was no point in talking about it, too. And...I don't know, it felt weird telling you about it when I took the pictures. Rose is the one who talked me into it, but beyond her and Angela, no one knew." She paused, before tossing in, "Well, I _thought_ no one knew. It just...didn't seem like the kind of thing you'd want to know about me."

She relaxed when Emmett laughed and leaned back in the chair. "Yeah, it was rough enough realizing those pictures were of you. I'd probably have gone crazy knowing my little Ducky was doing something like that."

Bella reached over and shoved playfully on his shoulder, grinning at him. "So, why didn't tell me about seeing these pictures earlier? I've been going out of my mind for nearly two weeks! And, do you think you can get those pictures back from him? I know he's a nice enough guy, but I'd feel better if they weren't in a stranger's hands."

"I only just saw him looking at him a couple days ago. And it took me that long to work up the guts to ask you about it. I kept talking myself out of it, because I couldn't believe you'd do that to Edward, but then again, he had those pictures. I finally sucked it up and figured I'd just have to ask you. But I'll definitely get those pictures back for you."

"Thank you," Bella sighed, slumping in relief.

Emmett smiled mischievously. "Don't thank me just yet. You still have to tell Ratchet about all this. She's not going to be very happy that you didn't tell her right away and I knew about this before she did." Bella's face paled and she swallowed heavily.

"Oh, shit. I didn't even think of that. You have to be here for moral support. What time is it?" She checked the clock on her phone. "She should be home. We're going to call her now."

The phone rang a few times before Rose answered happily, "Hey, Ducks. What's up?"

"Hey, Rose. So, Emmett is here with me, and we've got a kinda funny story to tell you..."

"Oh? Do tell."

Bella relayed the events of the past few weeks, with Rose reacting loudly in all the right places. When Bella finally finished her tale, there was silence on the other end of the line.

"Rose?" Bella called warily, wishing she could see her face to give her clues how she was reacting.

"You should go out and buy a lottery ticket, like, right now, you lucky bitch," Rose finally drawled, and Bella sighed in relief that her friend didn't seem to be upset about being left out of the loop.

"I think I used up all my luck," she contended, laughing breathlessly.

"Oh my, God, Bella! Do you know how awful that could have turned out?"

Bella slumped against Emmett, who had moved to sit next to her on the bed while she was talking to Rose. "Yeah. I've been absolutely panicked for nearly two weeks now. Angela kept trying to apologize, but I was so caught up in what could go wrong, I didn't even want to hear it. It made it really tough to be in the same room with her."

"Are you going to forgive her now?" Emmett asked, and Bella shrugged.

"I'm still pissed that she showed the pictures to Ben and then lied about it, but I can't stay mad at her forever. I still have to live with her, y'know?"

"I have an idea..." Rose suggested. "And with what I'm thinking, you can get even with Angela, Ben, and Edward all at once."

o-o-o-o-o-o

Bella paused outside the door of the library and took a deep breath, centering herself. After getting off the phone with Rose, she'd gone with Emmett back to his room, and they'd had a conversation with Riley. He had flushed crimson when Bella asked him if she could have her pictures back, but he hadn't put up a fight about giving the USB back to her and deleting the pictures off of his hard drive.

Then, while Emmett went to work on their payback plan, Bella had called Edward to ask him to meet her at the library. She was thrilled when he told her he was already there with Ben and Angela; they were almost making it too easy for her.

Clutching the papers tightly in her hand, she took one more deep breath before pushing inside and seeking out her friends. She smirked when she saw them, tucked into a secluded corner. She recalled the panic of the past few weeks, getting herself worked up, before rushing over.

"Angela!" she screeched when she reached the table. Angela jerked in surprise, her highlighter scrawling across the passage she had been marking. She lifted her eyes to find a frantic Bella hovering over her.

"Bella! What's wrong?" she gasped, her eyes darting towards Ben for help. Edward regarded Bella warily, his eyebrows furrowed in concern.

"This!" Bella answered, shoving the papers into Angela's face. "_This_ is what's wrong!"

Angela took the crumpled pages from Bella's hand, smoothing them out on the table in front of her. She made a strangled noise when she saw the screenshot of a webpage displaying one of the pictures she'd taken of Bella. It was one of the less risqué shots, but it was still on a website for anyone to see. "Oh my, God," she whimpered. "Bella..."

Edward grabbed the top page from Angela, reading aloud the caption under the picture. "This UDub math major knows a thing or two about _bell_ curves and will show you how to deviate your standards." His stomach twisted, bile rising in his throat at the disgusting way someone had objectified his Bella.

All of the color drained from both Angela and Ben's faces. Angela buried her face in her hands, and Ben placed a calming hand on her shoulder.

"Bella, I'm so sorry," Angela whispered through her hands.

"There's more," Bella said, a steely edge to her voice.

Grudgingly, Angela pulled her hands away from her face and regarded the other pages still sitting in front of her. The next was another screenshot of the same website, this time of another, more risqué photograph. She lifted her eyes imploringly to Bella, but Bella just raised an eyebrow, forcing her to continue. The next picture was of a couple in a compromising position, with Bella's face visible.

Angela's eyebrows shot towards her hairline and her mouth gaped open. "But...that's not real!" she squeaked.

"Oh my, God," Edward breathed. He looked up at Bella, aghast, but she wouldn't meet his eyes.

"Keep going," Bella gritted out. It was taking all of her control to hold back her laughter, but it had the added advantage of making her voice waver slightly.

Another picture of a couple, this time with Edward's face visible in addition to Bella's; his eyes nearly bugged out of his head when he saw it. Then another picture. Angela let out a high pitch shriek. Ben leaned over to look at the picture and made an odd sort of choking sound.

Bella glanced at Edward, and could barely contain her laughter at the look on his face. She took a deep breath to steady herself, schooling her face into a scowl just in time for Angela to look up with wide, frantic eyes. "These are online?" she whispered, pointing at the picture that showed a couple in the throes of passion - a couple who just happened to look exactly like Ben and Angela. Bella felt a twinge of guilt for putting Edward and her friends through this, but pushed past it.

"There's one more," she replied, cutting her eyes over to Edward again.

Tentatively, Angela flipped to the last page. It was a picture of a smirking Bella holding Angela's lost USB drive in her hand, the word 'Gotcha' written in bold red letters above her head.

All three had identical looks of confusion, their brows furrowed as they tried to comprehend what the last picture meant. "I...I don't...what?" Angela finally stammered, her eyes bouncing between Bella, Edward, and Ben.

"I found out today that Emmett's roommate Riley is the one you bumped into. Emmett saw him looking at the pictures and brought them back to me. Since you lied to me and showed these to Ben, then lost that USB, I thought I'd give you a taste of the panic I've felt for the last two weeks. I'd say we're even now."

"Oh my God!" Angela shrieked. "This is all fake?" Bella nodded smugly.

"R2?" Edward murmured tentatively.

"Fake," she repeated, unable to contain her laughter anymore.

"Seriously?" he asked, his disbelief and frustration seeping into his voice.

"That's not funny," Ben growled. "You nearly gave me a heart attack."

"Yeah, what the hell?" Angela chimed in indignantly.

"Hey, how do you think I felt when I found out you'd seen those pictures?" Bella said with a pointed look at Ben, then turned to Angela. "Or when you lost the USB? I've been dealing with that feeling for weeks now." She then turned to Edward. "And you're my boyfriend! You couldn't find a moment in all that time we were together to tell me you'd see those pictures of me?"

They all had the decency to look chagrined. Angela was the first to recover. "This _is_ all fake, right?"

Bella laughed. "Yes. Emmett is actually pretty good with Photoshop, so he helped me rig these up. We pulled some pictures off the internet and 'shopped the faces in."

Angela slumped back in her chair and scrubbed her hands over her face, while Ben grabbed the pages, studying the pictures more closely. "I feel like I should pay you back for this, but I suppose this is _your_ payback. So you said something about us being even now?" Angela finally asked, a smile tilting the corner of her lips.

"You're buying the supplies for movie nights for the rest of the school year, but otherwise, yeah. I forgive you and we're even," Bella conceded.

"Fine. Jesus, I never knew you were so evil, Bella. Remind me not to get on your bad side again," Angela teased.

"Like you'll forget this any time soon," Bella replied with a grin.

"Do you think you could send me a copy of this picture?" Ben interjected, pointing to the couple with his and Angela's faces on it. The other three gaped at him for a moment before Angela smacked him on the back of the head and they all began laughing. "What? I was just asking."

Edward stood up and pulled Bella into a tight hug. "I'm glad you got the USB back, R2, but don't think I won't get you back for this," he murmured in her ear. She shivered, deciding she wasn't necessarily opposed to the type of payback his tone promised.

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: Whew! I know so many of you were worried Leah would end up with the USB and put them online. And tbh, I did write it that way at first. But I changed my mind since the emotional toll of something like that for Bella felt too deep for what I intended for this story. So we get happy endings :)**

**And many of you said you could understand Charlie's reasoning last chapter, though there was still a lot of anger at him for doing what he did. I loved seeing all your reactions to him, good and bad. **

**See you Wednesday!**


	27. Chapter 27

"No, this trick won't work... How on earth are you ever going to explain in terms of chemistry and physics so important a biological phenomenon as first love?"

~ Albert Einstein

o-o-o-o-o-o

"Thank God that's over with," Bella sighed as she collapsed into the chair next to Edward.

He glanced up from his Algorithms notes to give her a sympathetic smile. "Did the final go ok?"

Bella nodded and started rummaging in her backpack for her economics notebook. "Yeah, I mean, I was doing ok in calc for most of the semester, but you never quite know what to expect on those finals. At least he let us have a note sheet. Unlike bio where he expected us to memorize everything. _That _was not a fun final. You've still got a couple left, right?"

"Yeah, Algorithms is tomorrow, and then Physics is Thursday night. Whose brilliant idea was it to schedule a final for 6 pm?" he groused.

"I know! Apparently Angela has one on Saturday. That's just cruel," Bella agreed. "So, we haven't really talked about it yet, but do you want to come over for Christmas? I know Thanksgiving was kinda awkward, but Dad usually works Christmas Day, so you and I would have the house to ourselves."

"Oh," Edward said, startled. "I thought I told you I was going back to Alaska for winter break. I swear we talked about it..."

Bella's face fell. "You're not staying here?" she murmured, her surprise and disappointment evident on her face.

"Mom and Dad figured since break is a couple weeks, it would make sense, and they want me up there for Christmas. Plus, I haven't seen Alice or Jasper since August, and I miss them," he defended.

"Oh," she muttered, dropping her eyes to her notebook, an embarrassed flush spreading across her cheeks. Of course his parents would want him home for Christmas, and he'd want to see his friends. It's not like there was any real reason for him to stay here.

"You're not going to stop talking to me again, are you?" Edward asked sarcastically. He had intended the words to be light and joking, but they came out much sharper than he'd planned. Bella gasped, shocked at the venom in his tone. He glanced up, seeing the wounded look on her face, and immediately regretted his careless words. "Bella, shit. I'm sorry. I didn't mean that. It's just stress from finals, and shit like that, and I shouldn't have taken it out on you," he pleaded, reaching over and settling his hand on her wrist.

"No," she sniffled, using her free hand to scrub away the traitorous tears that were brimming in her eyes. "I deserved that. I hurt you. A lot. And it makes sense you'd be worried I'd do it again."

Edward shook his head, tugging her closer to him and settling his hand on the nape of her neck. "No, I told you I forgave you. I can't say that to you and then keep holding it over your head."

"I'm sorry I hurt you," Bella whispered, twin tears sliding down her cheeks. Edward stood and collected her into a tight hug.

"I know. But we're moving past that, right?"

"Yeah," she agreed in a small voice.

"Ok, then no more dwelling. I'm so sorry I snapped at you," he murmured, pressing his lips against her forehead in contrition. "Stay and study with me?"

Bella nodded against Edward's chest, tightening her arms around his waist briefly before pulling back. She gave him a watery smile and he dropped a gentle kiss to her lips. They settled back in to study, though Bella could hardly focus on the words in front of her.

o-o-o-o-o-o

Bella settled against the arm of the couch with her well worn copy of Dune, wrapping her favorite quilt around her shoulders. The house was quiet, with Charlie out running New Year's Eve crowd control. Not that it would have been much louder if he were there at home; though they'd talked after Esme's accusations at Thanksgiving, thing were still strained between them.

Speaking of strained relationships, she glanced at her phone, disappointed but not surprised that there were no new messages. After Edward's comments during finals, her guilt had returned full force. She'd hoped that with as well as things had been going since they reunited, he'd been able to reconcile her misdeeds, but clearly he still harbored some animosity.

They'd spoken on the phone several times during break, and texted nearly every day, but after his earlier sarcastic rebuke, she kept looking for hidden, deeper meanings in their interactions. She couldn't tell if guilt and doubt were skewing her perception, but often his words rang hollow, as if he were distracted, or simply going through the motions. She'd tried to call him earlier in the evening to see if he had any plans with Jasper and Alice for New Year's, but it had gone straight to voicemail. She'd also sent him a text, telling him she missed him and wishing him a happy New Year, but that was hours ago and he hadn't responded.

Suddenly, her phone buzzed against her thigh, startling her. The knot in her chest loosened infinitesimally when she saw the message from Edward.

_Thanks! Sorry I missed your call, I was out with Jasper. What are you up to tonight? ~E_

_Hot date with Ben &amp; Jerry and my couch ~B_

_Wouldn't that be a cold date? Should I be worried you can replace me so easily? ~E_

Bella cringed at his words, unable to tell if he were joking or serious. Ugh, this is why texting sucked; meanings became ambiguous. Either way, she needed him to know he wasn't replaceable.

_Never - you're one of a kind. I wish you were here. Or I was there. Or we were together, anywhere. ~B_

_I think you're just hoping for a midnight kiss ~E_

_Well that would be nice, but I just...miss you ~B_

_I have something that might help. I had Rose help me set up a surprise for you in your old tree house. Go find it ~E_

_Seriously? I'm in my PJs and it's cold out ~B_

_Bring a blanket with you. It'll be worth it. Promise. Pleeeeease? *puppy dog eyes* ~E_

_Ugh, fine, but if I catch pneumonia you're bringing me soup ~B_

_Deal. Hurry. ~E_

Bella rolled her eyes at his impatience, but couldn't stifle the grin that spread across her face. She raced upstairs to grab a sweatshirt and socks, then headed out to her tree house with her quilt tucked under her arm.

When she reached the top of the little ladder, she tossed the blanket into the tree house first, then squeezed through the child-sized doorway. She straightened up, scanning the room though her eyes weren't quite adjusted to the early evening darkness. Just as she turned to look in the corners behind her, a light flicked on and she gasped, her hand flying to her chest, clutching at her racing heart.

"Oh my God! What are you doing here?"

"Surprising my girlfriend," Edward murmured, stepping forward from the little camping lantern he'd brought up into the tree house with him.

Bella flew into Edward's open arms, her doubts from the past few days obliterated with his sudden appearance. She crashed her mouth against his, pressing as close to him as possible. After several interminable minutes, their kisses slowed, gentling into sweet caresses.

Finally, Edward pulled back, pressing his cheek against Bella's. "I missed you," he whispered, his warm breath tickling her ear.

"So much," Bella agreed softly. After a moment, her curiosity won the better of her. "Why are you in my tree house?"

Edward laughed, dropping a soft kiss to her neck. "I wasn't sure if Charlie was home, and I figured it would be safer to have you come to me. Plus, it felt kinda symbolic, like we'd come full circle. The last time we were up here, I told you about us moving to Alaska, and now here I am, back from Alaska."

"Mmm," Bella hummed in agreement, nuzzling closer to him. "I like that. I hated coming up here after you left, because it reminded me of you leaving. Now, I have a better memory."

They stood wrapped in each other for a few more minutes until Edward noticed Bella shivering against him. "Where's that blanket I told you to bring?" he asked, searching for the pile of fabric that had announced her arrival to the tree house.

"Let's just go inside. It's nice and warm in there," she suggested, tugging on his hand. He hesitated, and she looked back with a slight frown on her face. "What's wrong?"

"Charlie...?"

"Is on duty. He's doing security and crowd control for The Islander cruise tonight. He'll be on a boat in the middle of Lake Union until well after midnight," Bella explained. This time, Edward let her pull him out of the tree house.

They settled onto the couch, Bella between Edward's legs with her back nestled against his chest, her old quilt tucked carefully around them. Edward rested his chin on her shoulder, and she leaned her head back against him.

"Do you have a New Year's resolution?" he asked softly once they were settled, rubbing his thumbs up and down her upper arms.

Bella wrinkled her nose. "I decided not to bother this year, since I never keep up with them. Why, do you have one?"

"Yeah, and it's one I'm positive I'll be able to keep," Edward admitted, blowing out a nervous breath and bracing himself. Bella turned her head to look up at him curiously, waiting for him to reveal his resolution. He gave her a hesitant smile before saying, "My resolution is to not let a day go by without showing you how much I love you." He watched her nervously, waiting for her reaction to his declaration.

Bella's breath caught in her throat momentarily before a wide grin spread slowly across her face. "Hm, well that seems like the kind of resolution I might actually be able to keep," she agreed. "Maybe mine should be: make the most of this second chance with the amazing man I've loved forever."

The tension in Edward's shoulders melted into relieved bliss, and the grin on his face rivaled Bella's as he leaned down to capture her mouth in a deep kiss. "Forever, huh?" he asked once he'd pulled back.

"Ever since you drew that swan for me when we were five," Bella admitted.

"You mean ever since you _forced _me to draw that swan for you?" he teased.

Bella scoffed indignantly. "I did not!"

"You totally did, bossy little thing that you were. I was afraid for my life if I went against you."

"Shut up!" she scolded, trying to scowl, but unable to keep the giddy smile off her face. She'd known she'd been in love with him, but hearing him reciprocate - she wasn't sure she'd be able to sleep tonight with the adrenaline coursing through her veins.

"Make me," Edward challenged playfully, pinching at Bella's waist, just as high on adrenaline as her.

She yelped and squirmed away from his fingers, then flipped herself over so she was straddling him. "That can be arranged," she purred, cupping the back of his head and drawing him in for a deep kiss.

As their tongues met and caressed, Bella slipped her hands under the hem of Edward's sweatshirt, scraping her nails gently against the silky skin of his abdomen. He shivered at the pleasurable touch, his hands fluttering for a moment before anchoring themselves on her hips. Bella rocked her hips experimentally against his, and they both moaned at the delicious friction.

Suddenly, Bella had slipped her top off, leaving her in only a delicate blue bra, and her hands were fumbling at the fly of his jeans. Edward dropped a hand to still her. "I want you," she protested, and he swallowed thickly. He knew he had good reasons to stop her, but at the moment, with her hovering over him, all swollen lips and glazed eyes and smooth skin, her soft heat pressing exactly where he wanted it most, he was having a difficult time remembering them.

"Wait," he pleaded, and Bella reared back as if she'd been struck.

"You...you don't want...?" she stammered, eyes darting around searching for her shirt to cover herself.

Edward sat up, pulling her tightly against his chest. "Of course I want you," he reassured, flexing his hardness against her to prove his point. "But I know once I start, I won't be able to stop. I want to learn everything about you, take my time with you, hold you against me afterwards. I want to fall asleep with you in my arms, and wake up to your beautiful face in the morning. I _don't_ want to have to rush out of here to avoid your dad when he comes home. Please?"

Bella nodded wordlessly, leaning down and pressing her lips gently against his. She felt his lips tighten and widen into a grin, and she pulled back, smiling at the mischief twinkling in his eyes.

"Of course," he drawled, tracing his hands up her bare back before unhooking her bra. "There are plenty of _other _things we could do..."

When they came up for air, flushed and sated, Bella snuggled against Edward's side, resting her ear against his still-racing heart. "Thank you," she murmured, pressing a kiss to his chest to punctuate her words.

"For what?" Edward asked, smiling gently as he tucked a tendril of hair behind her ear.

She shrugged self-consciously."For second chances. For being you." A shy smile curved her lips as she added, "For loving me."

Edward tilted her chin, catching her lips in a soul-searing kiss. "I told you, R2: it's always been you. I love you."

"I love you, too. So much," she whispered against his lips before settling her head back to his chest.

"Happy New Year, Bella," Edward whispered, combing his fingers gently through her hair.

"Happy New Year, Edward."

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: Oh, Edward, putting your foot in your mouth like that. But he more than made up for it, I think. That first time saying "I love you" is so nerve-wracking, even in cases like this when they've really loved each other for years.**

**See you Saturday...it's going to be a good one ;)**


	28. Chapter 28

"But when a woman decides to sleep with a man, there is no wall she will not scale, no fortress she will not destroy, no moral consideration she will not ignore at its very root: there is no God worth worrying about."  
― Gabriel Garcí a Márquez, _Love in the Time of Cholera_

o-o-o-o-o-o

Edward had just stepped out of the shower when there was a knock on the apartment door. He growled to himself as he wrapped a towel around his waist, muttering as he stalked towards the door as the person on the other side of it began knocking again.

"Ben, seriously, this is the second time this week! Do I need to glue your key to your -" he called as he yanked the door open, expecting to find his forgetful roommate on the other side. He cut off abruptly when he saw Bella's surprised brown eyes staring back at him. "Oh," he stammered, suddenly very aware that he was in only a towel. "Um...I thought you were Ben."

Bella glanced down at her obviously feminine body, then arched an eyebrow at Edward. "Unless there's something I don't know about Ben...and Angela, for that matter..." she drawled, making Edward flush.

"No, I just mean, he keeps forgetting his keys when he goes to class, and then he acts like it's my fault when I don't let him in immediately," Edward explained.

"Hm...well I suppose, I can let this one slide. Unless you're saying I look like a dude."

"Um, nope, I'm _definitely_ aware that you're not a dude," he chuckled, eyeing her up and down to prove his point, aware the towel did very little hide the semi he was now sporting.

She smirked at him, blatantly ogling his crotch before lifting her eyes to meet him again. "So I see. Aren't you going to invite me in?"

"Oh, yeah, sorry. Come in," he said, stepping back so she could enter. She trailed her fingernails over his chest as she brushed past him, the sensation sending pleasant tingles across his torso. "So, to what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?"

Bella shrugged, a coy smile tugging at her lips. "Oh, you know, just thought I'd swing by and surprise you. So, surprise!"

"I like this kind of surprise," he purred, leaning in to drop a kiss on her lips. She stepped closer, standing on her tiptoes so she could press her lips more firmly against his.

As the kiss intensified, Bella dragged her fingers across his chest and over his abs, before dropping to toy with the edge of the towel slung around his hips. Edward clutched the knot of the towel tighter in his hand to prevent it from slipping even lower. "What are you doing?" he asked hoarsely.

"Seducing you," she answered nonchalantly, as if that were a perfectly normal thing to say. Edward swallowed thickly, and Bella reveled in the way the muscles of his jaw flexed as he absorbed her words.

"Bella..." he started cautiously, but she cut him off before he could voice any protest.

"I want you," she implored quietly, taking a deep breath as she prepared to lay her heart on the line. "You have been my first everything - first real friend, first kiss, first boyfriend, first love. I want you to be _all _of my firsts."

Edward screwed his eyes shut tightly, trying desperately to reign in the lust that shot through his veins at her words. "Ben could come back," he whispered weakly. He wasn't really trying to change her mind, but with their luck, he thought it best to at least mention the possibility that they could be interrupted.

"Ben is going to spend the night with Angie tonight. I brought ingredients for dinner, and I brought a change of clothes. I'm yours, if you want me," she offered, completely obliterating his self control.

"God, you have _no idea _how much I want you," Edward groaned, crushing his mouth against hers in a feverish kiss. Bella dropped her bag to the floor as her arms wound around his neck, toying with the short hair at the nape of his neck. He skimmed his hands down her side before sliding them around to cup her ass, pulling her forward so her hips were flush against his. Bella could feel the thick ridge of him pressed against her stomach, and she squirmed against him, trying to get closer.

Suddenly, he wrenched his lips from her. "I don't have any condoms," he panted, his frustration and disappointment evident in his eyes.

Bella just smirked at him. "What kind of seduction would this be if I didn't come prepared?" she asked coyly, bending down and producing a box from her bag. Relieved, Edward couldn't help but smile at her preparedness, then leaned down to press hot, open-mouth kisses along the column of her throat.

He groaned when she shifted in his arms, one of her hands dropping down to cup him through his towel. He pressed himself against her hand, inhaling sharply as she increased the pressure of her grip. "Dinner?" he asked quietly, his lips grazing her neck with his words, sliding his mouth up to press his lips to the sensitive hollow below her ear. He wasn't particularly interested in food at the moment, but he could manage waiting if she was hungry.

"Later," she insisted, taking a step backwards, propelling him towards her since her hand was still gripping him through his towel.

They stumbled their way into Edward's bedroom, and in a sudden display of boldness, he pressed her against the door, grinding himself into the cradle of her hips. Bella gasped into his mouth, then curled a leg around his hips, pulling him tighter against her as she arched wantonly.

"I love you," he muttered, peppering kisses along her jaw and throat as he continued the slow roll of his hips against her.

Bella moaned, her hands scrabbling frantically against the smooth skin of his back before finding purchase in his ass. "I love you, too," she panted, squeezing the globes of flesh in her hand to punctuate her statement.

"It probably won't be any good," he warned as he pulled back slightly, knowing he was already near the end of his control. Just the thought of sliding into the welcoming heat between her legs made his cock twitch eagerly against her.

"It will be perfect," Bella disagreed. Edward gave her a doubtful look, but she smiled and brushed back a few strands of hair that had fallen over his forehead. "It will," she insisted, "Because it's you."

Edward just grunted in response, squeezing his eyes shut tightly as he dropped his forehead against hers. His breathing was harsh, the heady mix of lust and sentiment pushing him that much closer to the edge. He took a step back and Bella lowered her foot back to the floor, though she stayed pressed against the door, leaning against it until her legs were steady enough to hold her.

"You're way overdressed," he teased, and she smirked in response.

"Oh? Well, I suppose we'll have to fix that, won't we?" she drawled, dropping her hands to the hem of her shirt and lifting it slowly over her head. Edward's throat went dry as inch by torturous inch she revealed the smooth plane of her stomach, the sharp angles of her ribcage, the lower swell of her breasts.

He sucked in a strangled breath when the material lifted past her breasts and over her head. Bella couldn't help the smug grin that spread across her face as she watched Edward's reaction, but he didn't notice. He was too enthralled by the sight in front of him.

"Jesus, Bella. Are you trying to kill me?" he croaked, eyes raking over her hungrily. She was wearing a bra that looked exactly like the first he'd ever seen her wear - black with white polka dots, a deceptively sweet rosette nestled between the creamy globes of her breasts.

She let him look his fill, waiting patiently as his eyes committed every detail to memory. She figured it was the least she could do, considering she was ogling him exactly the same way.

Finally, Edward stepped forward and rested his hands gently on her ribcage, just below the band of the bra that had haunted his dreams for years. "Can I - ?" he asked hesitantly. Bella nodded and he slipped his hand behind her to fiddle with the clasp.

After tugging on it unsuccessfully for several long seconds, Bella laughed quietly and reached behind her back, opening the hook-and-eye closures with a flick of her wrist. Edward scowled and muttered something about Rubik's cubes, then was distracted by the way Bella's laughter caused her chest to jiggle.

He slid the straps over her shoulder, letting the garment drop to the floor. It may have starred in countless fantasies of his, but he had the real thing in front of him now, and reality was so much better. He caressed her skin, palming her and squeezing gently, before leaning down and capturing a pink nipple in his mouth.

Bella sighed happily, letting her head fall back against the door as she arched under his ministrations. Edward shifted to the other breast, his tongue circling and flicking while his thumb mimicked the moves on the nipple he'd just released. He worked her over until she was writhing and panting, then lifted his head up, a playful smirk lifting the corner of his mouth.

"Still overdressed," he chastised, dropping his hand to flick open the button on her jeans. He took his time sliding the zipper down, drawing out the anticipation, and Bella swore she could feel the vibrations all the way to her core.

When the material was slack around her hips, Edward dipped his hands beneath the waistband, sliding his palms behind her so he could cup her ass again, skin to skin this time, before pushing the material down her legs.

Bella shimmied to help the fabric move down her thighs before gravity took over, and the denim fell in a pool at her ankles, leaving her in only a pair of boy-shorts that match the discarded bra. She stepped out of her jeans while Edward's eyes raked over her again.

"Did you have matching panties like this back then, too?" he asked, his voice husky.

She nodded shyly.

He groaned and pressed himself against her, dropping a hungry kiss to her lips before muttering, "Jesus, I'm glad I didn't know that. I'd have been hard around you all the damn time."

Bella chuckled at him, then skated her hands up his torso, settling them on his pecs. "Bed?" she suggested softly, letting her thumb brush over his nipple, making him jerk.

He swallowed thickly again, and she could see the doubt start to creep into his eyes. Not wanting him to talk himself out of anything, she stepped forward, letting her fingers drift down his arm until she captured his hand in hers. She tugged him towards the bed, pausing only to retrieve the box of condoms.

Edward trailed behind her slowly, lust and insecurity battling for dominance. He wanted her more than he wanted his next breath, but he was terrified something would go wrong. What if he was a two-pump-chump? What if he hurt her? What if she hated it and never wanted to see him again?

Bella lowered herself to the mattress, her hair spilling in a glossy halo of curls around her head, just like it had in his dreams so many times before, and Edward had to restrain himself from pouncing on her and claiming her like a wild animal. She scooted up the bed towards his headboard, then beckoned him to join her. He hesitated, and Bella's smile faltered.

"Please?" she whispered, worried that he was changing his mind about being with her. She relaxed, though, when he sank to his knees on the bed next to her with a groan.

"You're so beautiful," he whispered reverently, tracing his knuckles along her cheekbone before grazing them down her neck and over her collar bone. He couldn't decide where to look first, trying to memorize the vision of her in front of him, in case she would decided afterwards that this was a mistake.

Edward's eyes bounced around over her exposed body, drinking in the sight of her. Her smooth stomach, rising and falling rapidly with her excited breaths. Her breasts, perfectly sized and tipped with sweet, pink nipples just begging for his attention. Her long, smooth legs, childhood memories of scraped knees and twisted ankles warring with this new vision of them, bare and ready to wrap around his waist. The juncture of her thighs, a tiny scrap of fabric preventing him from seeing the soft curls and smooth skin he knew were waiting for him.

Finally, he settled his gaze on her face, her eyes soft and understanding, lust simmering behind them as she watched him watch her. "I love you, Edward," she repeated softly, reassuring him as she reached for the knotted end of the towel at his hips.

His breath faltered as she loosened the terrycloth, letting it drop to the floor, but she kept her eyes locked on his, giving him a chance to adjust. Only when the tension in his gaze had faded to desire did she allow her eyes to wander over him, taking in his leanly muscled torso, swirls of hair on his chest and stomach, then lower, where his cock stood proud and eager.

Edward's hands were clenched at his sides as Bella looked her fill, and for a moment, she silently appreciated how the tension made the veins in his forearms protrude, ropy and masculine. Then, she reached out, linking her fingers with his and tugged him down so he was hovering over her.

He pressed soft, reverent kisses to her forehead, her cheeks, her nose, before catching her lips gently with his own. What started off tenderly quickly escalated to deep, fervent kisses, all teeth and tongue and lips.

Edward shifted his weight to one elbow, giving him freedom to skim his hand down Bella's side. She shivered at his feather-light touch, her hips subtly lifting in invitation. When he reached the elastic band of her panties, he paused, trailing his fingertips along the edge of the fabric from one hip to the other.

Their eyes met, seeking and reassuring, then Edward slipped his fingers under the fabric. She lifted her hips to help him maneuver the panties down her legs, then kicked them to the floor when they tangled around her ankles.

Edward's hand trailed up the sensitive skin of her inner thigh, and her knees fell apart, granting him access. He slid a finger through her folds, finding her already slick with anticipation. Bella hummed her pleasure as she reached towards him, but he shifted just out of her reach. She pouted at him, and he dropped an apologetic kiss to her nose. "You first," he whispered.

Bella smiled her understanding, knowing how nervous he was about making the experience perfect for them both, even after she'd tried to reassure him. Her eyelids fluttered closed as Edward stroked her, her breath hitching each time he passed over the most sensitive part of her, then she gasped as he slid a finger into her.

He pumped his hand gently, his thumb rubbing tight circles against her, winding the coil in her abdomen tighter and tighter. When he added a second finger and curled them against a particularly sensitive spot, the coil sprang loose, and she clenched and shattered around him. He brought her down from her high gently, peppering kisses along her collarbone and neck, before leaning over to the night stand.

The sound of ripping cardboard seemed unnaturally loud in the otherwise quiet room as Edward opened the box of condoms, fishing out a strip of the foil packets. He tore one of the packets from the strip, and made a move to tear it open before Bella stilled him with a hand on his wrist.

"Let me?" she asked shyly. Edward swallowed thickly, but nodded, handing the condom to Bella. She removed the slippery latex ring, then wrapped her hand around his shaft. She pumped him gently a few times, and just as he was starting to flex his pelvis into her strokes, he felt the cool latex followed by Bella's fingers smoothing the condom over him.

She leaned back, and Edward settled himself against her. They both sucked in a breath when their naked flesh met, hard and masculine against soft and feminine. Bella smiled at him, then arched up and captured his lips with hers. Anticipation made their kisses wet and sloppy, and their hips shifted instinctively against each other, seeking friction.

Edward darted a hand down to where they pressed together, spreading the evidence of her arousal around her lips before taking himself in hand and positioning himself at her entrance. She looked up at him through heavy-lidded eyes, and he didn't even need to ask if she was sure or ready; the love and trust in her gaze told him everything he needed to know.

"I love you," he whispered, resting his lips against hers as slowly pressed himself into her. When he was fully seated in her, he stilled, taking a deep, shuddering breath. She was so warm, so tight around him. Heaven.

Bella watched as he squeezed his eyes shut, the tendons in his neck and shoulders tight with tension as he held himself above her. She felt so very full; it wasn't unpleasant, per se, but it was a very foreign sensation. She flexed her hips a little to adjust, clenching involuntarily, and Edward groaned low in his throat.

"It's ok," she whispered, lifting her hand to brush back the hair that had fallen across his forehead. His eyes were glassy with barely contained lust when they met hers, and she smiled reassuringly at him. "You can move. Please."

He made another low noise in his throat before slowly pulling his hips back, then pushing forward again. His eyes rolled back in his head at the feeling, and he repeated the motion, stretching and filling Bella again and again. He'd never felt anything so incredible, her slick warmth gripping him in the most delicious way.

"Are you...? Oh, God. I can't..." he panted, hoping Bella understood his stilted words. He desperately wanted her to join him in this blissful pleasure, but the sensations were too intense, he couldn't hold back much longer.

"It's ok," she answered gently, understanding his intent. It felt nice, good even, and watching Edward take his pleasure from her made her heart clench in the most amazing way, but she wasn't there. "Let go, Edward. I love you."

At her permission, Edward dropped his forehead to her shoulder, his panting breath hot and humid against her skin as he pressed into her over and over, before he gave one final thrust. With a shuddering groan of her name, he stilled with his hips pressed tight against hers as he pulsed his release into her.

Bella scratched her nails lightly over the smooth expanse of Edward's back as he floated down from his orgasm, smiling to herself. After catching his breath, he rolled to his side, keeping Bella close to him as he pressed a soft kiss to her forehead.

"I don't think I can move," he murmured, his arms caging her in loosely.

"So don't," she replied, snuggling against him.

He grimaced and gestured to his hips. "Gotta," he said, grunting as he swung himself up and out of bed, discarding the condom and returning with a handful of tissues. He handed them to Bella, who accepted them gratefully.

"Are you hungry?" Bella asked as she snuggled back into Edward's embrace. "I can make us dinner."

He nuzzled his nose into her hair. "Later," he decided. "Right now, I've got everything I need right here."

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: Took them long enough, huh? **

**I feel like I should warn you, there's only one more chapter and an epilogue. We're nearing the end of our journey with these two lovebirds. I can't thank you enough for joining me on this ride. **

**See you Wednesday!**


	29. Chapter 29

"October knew, of course, that the action of turning a page, of ending a chapter or of shutting a book, did not end a tale. Having admitted that, he would also avow that happy endings were never difficult to find: "It is simply a matter," he explained to April, "of finding a sunny place in a garden, where the light is golden and the grass is soft; somewhere to rest, to stop reading, and to be content."

~ Neil Gaiman, _The Sandman, Vol. 4: Season of Mists_

o-o-o-o-o-o

Bella woke slowly, stretching languidly with a sleepy smile on her face. She turned to her right, and her smile widened when her eyes landed on Edward. His face was smooth and peaceful as he slept, his mouth slightly open, and his hair a riotous mess against the pillow.

The fact that he was wearing only boxers, and the sheets were twisted around his ankles, leaving his whole lean body available for her viewing enjoyment was just a bonus.

She had to admit, she certainly liked waking up next to Edward more than she liked waking up alone in her dorm room. Since the first night she'd stayed over, she'd spent the night a handful of other times, usually when Ben was working; he did IT support for the residence halls, and was scheduled for the overnight shift every few weeks.

With a disbelieving smile tugging at her lips, she marveled silently for a moment at how differently this year had gone than she'd expected. She'd started college, expecting to keep her head down, focus on classes, hang out with Emmett; basically just coast. But then Edward had barreled back into her life, and turned her boring little plans upside down.

As if he could feel her eyes on him, Edward stirred, blinking his eyes open slowly. "Good morning, 3PO," Bella whispered.

"Mmm...morning," he replied, his voice thick with sleep. "What time is it?"

Bella glanced at the small digital clock on his end table. "7:45. What time is your first final today?"

"10, over in Bagley."

"That means you have time for breakfast," she said, swinging her legs around towards the edge of the bed.

Edward growled and grabbed her around the waist. "Where do you think you're going?"

Bella giggled as he pulled her back against him, his lips immediately latching onto the tender flesh on the nape of her neck.

"Aren't you hungry?" she chastised. He tightened his arms around her as she squirmed, nipping gently at her skin.

"Starving," he agreed, rolling them so he was hovering over her.

She rolled her eyes at him, but couldn't contain her grin. "You're impossible."

"Maybe, but you love me anyway."

"I do. So much," she agreed, leaning up to press a tender kiss against his lips. Edward pressed his lips against her harder, but she twisted her head away when he tried to slip his tongue past the seam of her lips.

"Morning breath," she murmured, pressing her lips to his jaw in apology. He snorted, but complied, skimming his lips along her neck and collarbone. "You know, a nutritious breakfast is important before a big test."

"Mmmhmm," he mumbled against her skin as he shifted over to her other collarbone. He skimmed a hand up her ribcage to cup her breast through her thin pajama top, her nipple pebbling under his palm.

She arched into his touch, as she continued in a breathy voice, "I don't want to feel responsible if you don't do well on your chem final."

"I find I always do better on tests if I'm very, very relaxed beforehand," he offered huskily as his hand flexed against her.

"Oh, well, in that case..." she murmured, pulling him down against her, flexing her hips up to meet his. He responded eagerly, slipping his hands under her shirt so he could palm her breasts. They quickly shed their pajamas, exposing sleep warmed flesh to the cool air of the bedroom.

The crinkle of a foil packet filled the otherwise quiet room, then Edward was pressing himself slowly into Bella. Their movements were gentle and languid, no rush or urgency, simply enjoying the luxury of being able to start their day this way.

Bella tipped over the edge first, clutching tightly to Edward as she careened into bliss, and with a reverent kiss to her forehead and a low groan of her name, Edward followed her into oblivion.

o-o-o-o-o-o

"Can you believe we're here?" Bella asked as she plated up a stack of pancakes, sliding them across the counter to Edward. He glanced around the apartment, and gave her a confused quirk of his brow. She rolled her eyes playfully, and explained. "I don't mean _here,_ your apartment. I mean _here_, the end of the year. Together. In love."

Edward smiled softly and reached across the counter to lace his fingers with hers. He brought her knuckles up to his lips, pressing a soft kiss there. "Yes. Sometimes I feel like I'm in the middle of a fantastic dream, but this just feels so...right. We were always supposed to be together, even if we took our sweet time figuring it out. Plus, I knew you couldn't resist me forever. I'm amazing."

Bella snorted and tugged her hand away. "Don't forget humble." Edward grinned unrepentantly and dug into his pancakes, moaning his appreciation as the fluffy, buttery cake melted in his mouth.

"Damn, I'm good," Bella smirked, scooping up a forkful of her own breakfast.

"A guy could get used to this kind of test prep," Edward teased, wiggling his eyebrows lasciviously to drive home that he wasn't referring to the breakfast.

Bella tapped her chin thoughtfully. "Well, I suppose I could tell Ben he needs to help you out before big tests..." she drawled. Edward grimaced and pushed his plate away.

"Ugh. Thanks for that visual," he said sarcastically. "Now I've lost my appetite."

"More for me," she grinned, reaching for his pancakes with her fork. He snatched the plate back, curling his arm around it protectively. Bella just laughed and continued eating her own breakfast. "You still planning on meeting me at the library before my final?"

"Of course," he agreed. "Though since we'll be in public, it probably wouldn't be appropriate for me to relax you the same way you relaxed me this morning..." He wiggled his eyebrows suggestively, and Bella laughed around a mouthful of pancake. "Hot," he teased.

"Your fault," she retorted, taking a sip of her milk.

Edward glanced at his phone, checking the time, and sighed. "Time to go," he announced. They strolled together towards the chemistry building, enjoying the promise of summer in the air on campus.

Bella wrapped her arms around Edward's neck when they stopped outside Bagley, kissing him soundly. "Good luck. I know you'll do awesome," she murmured against his lips.

"Thanks," he said, pressing his lips to hers again. "See you soon. Love you."

"You, too," Bella agreed as she headed off towards the library with a wave.

o-o-o-o-o-o

Bella and Edward were huddled together at a table in the library, going over their calculus notes, when the clack of heels rushed past their table. Bella glanced up, and was surprised to see Leah, a thunderous scowl on her face, trailed by her friend Vanessa. She nudged Edward, pointing towards the two girls who looked like they were on a mission.

"Wonder what got her panties in a twist?" Bella whispered, her curiosity piqued. Edward just shrugged. He didn't particularly care; Leah seemed to have gotten the hint after he yelled at her in the fall, and since he didn't have any classes with her this semester, he hadn't seen her since the physics final.

Bella had just turned back to her notes when she heard a loud yelp, followed by a very confused, "What the fuck!"

Their heads whipped in the direction of the disgruntled voice, seeing Vanessa standing over a dripping wet Jacob, an empty water bottle poised over his head. As he gaped up at Vanessa, Leah pulled a jar out of her bag, unscrewed the lid, and upended it over him. A cloud of pink glitter poured out, coating his hair, face, and shoulders until he looked a little like a pink disco ball.

"Jesus Christ!" Jacob bellowed, leaping out of his seat and swiping frantically at his face. His movements did nothing but spread the glitter around. Leah and Vanessa stood back, vicious smiles on their faces. He whirled to face them, though the murderous look on his face didn't have the same effect since he was very pink and very sparkly. "What the fuck did you do that for?"

"_That_ was payback, you slimeball," Leah smirked.

"What did I ever do to you?"

"Oh, you mean, what did you do besides fuck and duck on me? Or besides moving on to do the same thing to my bestie, here?" She jerked a thumb at Vanessa, who wiggled her fingers at him in a sarcastic wave. "How about the fact that you gave us both crabs, you disgusting weasel!" With that, both girls stormed off, leaving a bewildered Jacob gaping at their retreating backs.

Bella clapped a hand over her mouth to hold in her shocked laughter, but Edward had no problem letting his laughter out. "Dodged a bullet with that one," he snickered, remembering Jacob's persistent pursuit of Bella earlier in the school year.

"Pffft," she snorted, snuggling up against him. "Like that douche ever stood a chance. And Leah certainly dropped her standards after you shot her down."

"Well, when you start at the top, there's nowhere to go but down," Edward drawled, buffing his fingernails on his shirt as he puffed out his chest jokingly. Bella smacked him playfully in the stomach, forcing the air out of his lungs in a quick whoosh.

He dragged her closer, flexing his fingers into the ticklish flesh of her midriff. She squeaked and tried to wriggle out of his grip, but he held her close. He dropped a quick kiss to her temple before pulling back to grin at her. "Want to get out of here? I have a feeling it's going to be too distracting here now."

Bella glanced back over where Jacob was futilely trying to shake the glitter out of his hair as everyone around him tried to pretend they weren't staring at him. There certainly was a wider berth around him now that Leah had announced that he had crabs.

"Yeah, let's go. I'm not going to be able to memorize anything else without making my brains ooze out of my ears anyway," she agreed, packing up her notes and leading Edward out into the early afternoon sunshine.

o-o-o-o-o-o

Bella was sprawled on the quad, basking in the joy of having finished her last final of the year and making the most of the rare Seattle sunshine. At least, she was, until a shadow blocked her light. She squinted one eye open, smiling when she saw Edward grinning down at her.

"Hey," she greeted, closing her eyes again. Something dropped onto her face and she gave a frustrated growl as she grabbed at it; she just wanted to enjoy being done with school for a few months and he was messing with her. She sat up, eying the envelope in her hands. "What's this?" she asked, turning it over in her hands curiously. There were no markings on it besides her name written in elegant script on the front.

"An envelope," he deadpanned. "Open it, genius."

She stuck her tongue out at him as she slid her thumb under the flap, opening it carefully. Edward rolled his eyes at her caution. "It's not anthtrax," he teased. "Just open it already." He could barely contain his excitement and was having a difficult time holding his tongue.

"Edward?" Bella breathed as she pulled out a pair of plane tickets, one for departure to Alaska in three weeks, and one for the return trip a month later. "What are these?"

"Plane tickets so you can come spend some time with us this summer," he announced, practically bouncing with excitement. "When I was scheduling when I'd go up there, Mom insisted you come with. She talked with Charlie, and he agreed to pay for the flight since we'll be putting you up and feeding you for the month."

"Charlie agreed to this?" Bella gaped at him, and he nodded excitedly. "How?"

Edward shrugged. "You know Mom, she's persuasive when she needs to be. Or maybe he's trying to make up for his part in keeping us apart in high school. Either way, does it really matter? You do want to come, right?" For the first time, a sliver of doubt crept in. Maybe he'd been presumptuous in letting his mom pull the trip together.

But his fears melted away when Bella launched herself off the ground, wrapping her arms tightly around him. "Are you serious? This is amazing!" She gave a very uncharacteristic squeal, then kissed him soundly on the lips. "Thank you! I can't wait to spend the summer with you."

"You know the summer is just the beginning. I've said it before, and I'll say it again: you're stuck with me forever, R2," Edward promised, kissing her gently.

Bella grinned up at him, happiness and love sparkling in her eyes. "3PO, I wouldn't have it any other way."

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: Well...I don't even know what to say here. Let's do the important stuff before I get into the sappy stuff, yes? There is an epilogue yet to come, but this is the end of the road for these two and it's so bittersweet to mark this story as "complete". I currently have no plans for a sequel or any future-takes, but never say never. I also have plans to post a pdf of the entire story to my blog (once I figure out the tech aspects of it), so keep an eye out for that if you're interested. **

**There's an awesome contest coming up called Meet the Mate that I will be writing at least one entry for, so keep an eye out for that and see if you can figure out which is mine (and then maybe vote for it if you like it? *wink wink*) u/6798308/MeetTheMateContest**

**Ok, on to the sappy. You all have made this such an extraordinary experience. I can't begin to tell you how much I have appreciated your faves, follows, and especially your words in your reviews. I love reading your reactions and thoughts, and seeing so many of you reviewing each and every chapter (even if it was just a smile)...each and every one made me smile. **

**Thank you, truly, for your gracious and overwhelming reception of this story.**

**Until next time,**

**XO Eli**


	30. Epilogue

"Sonny, don't you tell me what's worthwhile-true love is the best thing in the world, except for cough drops. Everybody knows that."

~ William Goldman, _The Princess Bride_

o-o-o-o-o-o

**Age 22:**

"Bella!" Rosalie barked impatiently. "Stop pacing! You're going to wear a hole in the floor and then we won't get the security deposit back."

Edward was coming to pick Bella up a 5 so they could exchange gifts before joining his parents for dinner, and she had been pacing around the apartment she shared with Rosalie and Angela for the last half an hour. "I can't help it," Bella whined. "Seriously, I think he's going to propose tonight."

"Remind me why?" Rosalie asked, hoping to distract her for a few minutes.

"Well, we've been together for a few years now," Bella began ticking off on her fingers. "So, we've talked about it before, that it's kinda an inevitability. But, we've been talking about it more lately, especially since we're almost done with college and starting to figure out what we want to do after we've graduated. Then, at Thanksgiving, he was looking over my shoulder as I went through the Black Friday ads, making a lot of comments about the rings in the ads. Plus, he's been kinda...I don't know...jumpy lately?"

Rosalie just hummed and nodded as she put the finishing touches on the package she was wrapping. "Guess you'll find out in a few hours, huh?" She didn't mean to sound flippant, but Bella had been obsessing for the past few weeks, and Rosalie could only give her reassurances so many times before she felt like she was repeating herself.

"I know, I know," Bella groaned, flopping back on the couch. "Sorry, I know you're sick of me."

"Nah, I just think you're thinking too hard about it. You just need to go with the flow."

Bella sighed. "You're right...but easier said than done, y'know?"

"I know, Ducky. Just breathe."

She took an exaggerated deep breath, then checked her phone again, sighing when she saw only four minutes had passed since the last time she'd checked. It was going to be a long couple of hours.

Rose breathed a sigh of relief when Edward finally arrived and she buzzed him up to the apartment. Bella was in her room, changing her outfit for the fourth time, and Rose was ready to strangle her.

"Ready to go, R2?" Edward asked when Bella emerged a few minutes later. She nodded, lacing her fingers with his as he reached for her. "You look lovely," he murmured, kissing her gently.

The knot in Bella's stomach loosened a little at his smile and sweet words. "You look pretty good, yourself, 3PO," she replied, taking a moment to appreciate the way his button down shirt stretched across his broad shoulders. "See you tomorrow, Rose," she called over her shoulder as Edward helped her into her coat and they headed down to his car.

The small measure of calm Bella had achieved diminished the closer they got to Edward's apartment, and by the time he had unlocked the door and ushered her inside, she was a bundle of nerves again.

Edward flipped on some soft Christmas music while Bella poured them some wine, then they settled together on the couch. "You ok?" Edward asked softly, seeing how stiff she was next to him.

"Mmhmm," she mumbled, taking a large sip of her wine and avoiding eye contact.

Edward opened his mouth to say something, then though better of it. Instead, he cupped the back of her neck and leaned in to press a soft kiss to her jaw. "Presents before or after dinner?"

"Before?" Bella squeaked. She couldn't possibly survive dinner with this level of anticipation. She took another gulp of her wine before mentally chastising herself for being ridiculous. Time to put on the big-girl panties. "Open yours first," she suggested, leaning down and retrieving the package she'd brought with her.

Edward kissed her again before ripping the paper and opening the box. He lifted the slim book out of the box, the solid black cover with an embossed infinity symbol not giving him any clues to its contents. He flipped to the first page, and his eyebrows shot to his hairline. Bella watched nervously as he paged through the book she'd put together with Angela's help.

Angela had been thrilled when Bella had approached her about recreating the original calendar photo shoot they had done freshman year. She was even more excited when Bella told her they would be for Edward, so she was ok with her face being in some shots. It also meant she was willing to do a few more risqué shots as well - the opening image was her in nothing but a sheet, sprawled on Edward's bed, her hair a cloud of tousled curls.

"This is my bed," Edward pointed out. Bella nodded, a sly smile curling her lips. "How?" he asked.

"Ben," she shrugged.

"Ben saw you like this?" he growled, possessive rage bubbling up inside him.

She laughed and cupped his face in her hands.

"Of course not. Angela helped me by taking the pictures, and we used Ben's key. He was in class while we took these," she reassured him. He relaxed immediately, feeling silly for his irrational reaction.

"These are amazing," he murmured as he flipped through more pictures, several of the original pictures interspersed with the new shots they had taken.

Bella smile shyly. "You always joked about wanting a copy of those pictures. So, I finally decided to give them to you. I hope you like it."

"I love it, Bella. This is amazing." He leaned in and pressed a reverent kiss to her lips. "Thank you."

"And I have the USB with the only copies of the pictures, so no worries of a repeat of _that_ debacle, either," she added. Edward threw back his head and laughed; it had taken a while, but now they were able to laugh about Angela losing the pictures of Bella.

"Thank God. And I'm really glad you even took the chance again. This is so worth it." By the time Edward had flipped through all of the pages in the book, he was ready to shoot a text to his parents and tell them not to expect him and Bella to join them for dinner, but he reminded himself there would be plenty of time for him to show her his appreciation later. Good things to those who wait, and all that.

Besides, she still needed to open her present. "Your turn," Edward announced, smiling softly at Bella before turning to the tree and rustling through the packages beneath it.

Her heart fluttered in her throat in anticipation. _This is it,_ she coached herself. But, when Edward turned back to her, he held out a flat, rectangular package, about the size of a text book. She kept her smile plastered on her face, even though her heart sank. _Guess he's not proposing._

She carefully tore the paper off the package, and lifted the lid to reveal a photo album. She hesitated, a little confused, and Edward prompted her, "Open it."

She opened the cover, finding a note written in Edwards distinctive scrawl.

_Bella,_

_You once told me that you wanted me to be all of your firsts. I can't tell you how happy it makes me that we got to share all of those moments together. _

_But you are so much more than a "first" to me. You are everything, and I put this together to show you just what you are to me. _

_I love you forever._

_Edward_

She glanced up at him with a glowing smile, before turning to the first page. Her smile widened when her eyes landed on the picture of them as children, sitting together on her porch, grinning at each other as their ice cream cones dripped down their arms. There was a handwritten caption beneath the picture: _You are the only person I'll share my mint chocolate chip with._

Bella continued to flip through the pages, finding pictures throughout her history with Edward, with notes beneath each, some silly, some sweet.

_You are my favorite teammate for Trivial Pursuit. _

_You are the person I can tell all of my hopes and dreams. _

_You are my favorite pillow. _

_You are my inspiration when I feel like giving up. _

_You are my partner in crime. _

_You are the reason my reality is better than my dreams._

The last picture was a shot of them from the previous summer, all dressed up for Esme and Carlisle's 25th Anniversary party. Bella was smiling at the camera, but Edward was gazing down at her, his expression one of pure adoration. The caption beneath said: _You are my best friend and the love of my life._

Bella looked up at Edward, tears shimmering in her eyes. "Thank you, Edward. This is wonderful," she murmured, her voice thick.

"There's more," he urged. Bella turned the page; there was no picture, just another note. _You are all of these things and more. But, there's one thing you're not..." _Bella's eyebrows knit in confusion, and she turned to the next page, hoping he had clarified that statement.

He did.

She gasped when she registered the words on the page, her heart fluttering wildly against her ribcage.

..._yet_

_My wife_

Beneath the words, a photograph of a ring box.

Bella's eyes flew to Edward, and she choked back a sob when she realized he was now kneeling before her, the ring box from the picture clutched in his hands.

"Bella, you are my everything, and I will love you forever. Will you marry me?" He flipped the box open, revealing a beautiful ring.

Her throat was tight with unshed tears, so she began nodding, finally managing to choke out an ecstatic, "Yes!"

Edward beamed at her, gathering her tight into his arms and pressing his lips against hers in a joyous kiss. "I love you so much."

"I love you, too," Bella murmured. Her smile spread wide across her face as Edward slipped the ring onto her finger.

He pointed to the band next to the sparkling center stone, where the metal twisted into a small infinity symbol. "Now, I tried this before with jewelry, and it didn't work, but hopefully this really drives it home. Infinity, Bella. That means I'm yours. Forever."

Bella kissed him soundly, before pulling back to lock gazes with him. She may have doubted the possibility of forever with Edward when they were teenagers, but now, there was no doubt in her mind. "You are my past, and my future," she promised. "You are my forever."

"No," Edward corrected gently. "We're each other's forever."

o-o-o-o-o-o

**A/N: Pic of the ring on my blog. **

**I love you all :)**


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